Church Signs
Signs of religious times

A clear conscience makes a soft pillow.
A man’s character is like a fence. It cannot be strengthened by whitewash.
A miser is a rich pauper.
Ask about our pray-as-you-go plan.
Aspire to inspire before you expire.
Beat the Christmas rush, come to church this Sunday!
Can’t sleep? Try counting your blessings.
Christians, keep the faith... But not from others!
Come early for a good Backseat.
Come in and have your faith lifted.
Come in and pray today. Beat the Christmas rush!
Come in and let us prepare you for your finals.
Come in. We’re prayer conditioned.
Come work for the Lord. The work is hard, the hours are long and the pay is love, but the retirement benefits are out of this world!
Delay is preferable to error.
Don’t give up. Moses was once a basket case!
Don’t wait for the hearse to take you to Church.
“Don't make me come down there” - God.
Dusty Bibles lead to Dirty Lives.
Everything you always wanted to know about heaven and hell but were afraid to ask.
Fall back into worship. [Autumnal message]
Fight truth decay - study the Bible daily.
“For fast, fast, fast relief, take two tablets.” [Headline for a picture of two hands holding stone tablets on which the Ten Commandments are inscribed]
Forbidden fruit creates many jams.
Free Trip to heaven. Details Inside!
God answers kneemail.
God so loved the world that He did not send a committee.
Home Church - For Members Only. Trespassers Will Be Baptized.
How will you spend eternity - Smoking or Non-smoking?
I was going to waste, but Jesus recycled me.
If some people lived up to their ideals they would be stooping.
If you can’t sleep, don’t count sheep. Talk to the Shepherd.
If you do not want to reap the fruits of sin stay out of the devil’s orchard.
If you don’t like the way you were born, try being born again.
If you’re headed in the wrong direction, God allows U-turns.
In the dark? Follow the Son.
It is unlikely there’ll ever be a reduction in the wages of sin.
It wasn’t raining when Noah built the ark.
It’s hard to stumble when you’re down on your knees.
K-mart is not the only saving place.
Life has many choices - For Eternity, two. What’s yours?
Looking at the way some people live, they ought to obtain eternal fire insurance soon.
May is God’s apology for February.
Never give the devil a ride. He will always want to drive.
No God - No Peace. Know God - Know Peace.
No Jesus - No Peace, Know Jesus - Know Peace!
No matter how much you nurse a grudge it won’t get better.
Our arms are the only ones God has to hug His children.
Patience is the ability to stand something as long as it happens to the other fellow.
People are like tea bags-you have to put them in hot water before you know how strong they are.
Pray up in advance.
Preach the gospel at all times. Use words if necessary.
Prevent truth decay. Brush up on your Bible.
Reputation is what people think about you. Character is what people know you are.
Running low on faith? Stop in for a fill-up.
Satan subtracts and divides. God multiplies and multiplies.
Searching for a new look? Have your faith lifted here.
Seven days without prayer makes one weak.
Sign broken. Message inside this Sunday.
Soul food served here.
Start living to beat hell.
The best vitamin for a Christian is B1.
The wages of sin is death. Repent before payday.
This is a ch__ch. What is missing?
Tithe if you love Jesus! Anyone can honk!
To belittle is to be little.
Trouble sleeping? We have sermons - come hear one.
Try Jesus. If you don’t like Him, the devil will always take you back.
Try our Sundays. They are better than Baskin-Robbins.
Under same management for over 2000 years.
Wal-Mart isn’t the only saving place!
We hold sit-in demonstrations every Sunday.
We should be more concerned with the Rock Of Ages, instead of the age of rocks.
What on earth are you doing for heaven’s sake?
What part of “THOU SHALT NOT” don’t you understand?
When down in the mouth, remember Jonah. He came out all right.
Will it take six strong pall-bearers to bring you back?
Worry is interest paid on trouble before it is due.
You are not too bad to come in. You are not too good to stay out.
You can give without loving but you cannot love without giving.
You think it’s hot HERE? [At an Arizona Church in August]

When the restaurant next to the Lutheran Church put out a big sign with red letters that said, “Open Sundays.”
The Church reciprocated with its own message: “We are open on Sundays, too.”

A singing group called “The Resurrection” was scheduled to sing at a Church. When a big snowstorm postponed the performance, the pastor fixed the outside sign to read, “The Resurrection is postponed.”


see also   Religious  &  Sign   Sections
All Dogs Go To Heaven
Biblical Humour
Church Sign Generator
Church Sign Messages
Devil Sky
Garden of Eat’En
God Darts
Judas Asparagus
Moses As A Lifeguard
Moses’ Headache Relief - the Sequel
Moses’ USB Tablets
Need A Lifeguard?
Organ Donor
Original Homeland Security - 2nd Amendment
Prayer Conditioning
Sundae Sermon
Sunday Weather Forecast
Truth Decay
Uplifting Church
Youth Pastor’s Last Speech

 

Runaway Tree

Human Explosion

Air Force Pilots

See You Later

Lunch Admirers

Loo View

Cell Phone Booth

Topless Kate Middleton

Skype Hype

Almost Batman

Cadillac Bike

Donut Decadence

Manmade Beach in Japan

Bacon Bikes

Animal Taxi
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22-May-2019