Webster’s First Dictionary

An alternative to talking to the wife





How to get along with your wife

QuotaBills
Women Liberteens - Archie Bunker

Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman - Christopher Walken

Women would rather be right than reasonable. - Ogden Nash

Age to women is like Kryptonite to Superman. - Kathy Lette

Love is blind, but marriage restores its sight. - Georg C. Lichtenberg

Her husband was infidelicate with another woman. - Archie Bunker

Taking joy in life is a woman's best cosmetic. - Rosalind Russell

Don't marry for money, you can borrow it cheaper. - Scottish Saying

I think housework is the reason most women go to the office. - Heloise Cruse

Bride: A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her. - Ambrose Bierce

A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong. - Rodney Dangerfield

If a word in the dictionary were mispelled, how would we know? - Steven Wright

My wife is such a bad cook, in my house we pray after the meal. - Rodney Dangerfield

There's two theories to arguing with a woman. Neither one works. - Will Rogers

Women are wiser than men because they know less and understand more. - James Stephens

I was going to marry a gardener, but he was too rough around the hedges. - Unknown

I think gay marriage is something that should be between a man and a woman. - Arnold Schwarzenegger

Why can't a woman be more like a dog, huh? So sweet, loving, attentive. - Kirk Douglas

If women can be railroad workers in Russia, why can't they fly in space? - Valentina Tereshkova

My best friend ran away with my wife. And let me tell you, I really miss him. - Henny Youngman

Sir, it is your duty to get married. You can't be always living for pleasure. - Oscar Wilde

A son is a son till he takes him a wife, a daughter is a daughter all of her life. - Unknown

In Hollywood, the women are all peaches. It makes one long for an apple occasionally. - W Somerset Maugham

Nothing changes the gender equation more significantly than women's economic freedom. - Gloria Steinem

If women ran the world we wouldn't have wars, just intense negotiations every 28 days. - Robin Williams

In life, it's not who you know that's important, it's how your wife found out. - Joey Adams

The true republic: men, their rights and nothing more; women, their rights and nothing less. - Franklin P Adams

In Las Vegas, a man said to his wife, "Give me the money I told you not to give me." - Henny Youngman

Women have a wonderful instinct about things. They can discover everything except the obvious. - Oscar Wilde

You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen, and that's not saying much for you. - Groucho Marx

The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open. - Groucho Marx

I would venture to guess that Anon, who wrote so many poems without signing them, was often a woman. - Virginia Woolf

I think women are foolish to pretend they are equal to men - they are far superior and always have been. - William Golding

Marriage always demands the greatest understanding of the art of insincerity possible between two human beings. - Vicki Baum

The scorn men express for a male who does housework is exceeded only by their aversion to a woman who doesn't. - Penny Kome

I wore a thong and a bra and a wig. Those things hurt. I mean, thongs? Like, they dig in. It takes a tough man to be a woman. - Hank Azaria

I think being a woman is like being Irish. Everyone says you're important and nice, but you take second place all the same. - Iris Murdoch

One disadvantage of being a hog is that at any moment some blundering fool may try to make a silk purse out of your wife's ear. - J.B. Morton

Can't figure women. Sometimes they're afraid of a spider, other times they're not afraid to stand right up to the devil. - Donal Harding

Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who cannot sleep with the window shut, and a woman who cannot sleep with the window open. - George Bernard Shaw


see also   Language,  Marriage  &  Relationship  Sections
3 Stages Of A Man’s Life
4 Stages Of Life
A Man’s Life
A Woman’s Hands
A Woman’s Mind
Bedside Non-Assistance
Before The Impact
Everything Men Know About Women
Female Attraction
“Female Speak” Translation
Flower Shop For Men
Hormone Guide
Keyboard Wedding
Looking For Your Wife?
Looking Small
Mission Gap - for Men & Women
Names of the Colours
Real Man’s Point System
Romance Lost
Secret Of A Long Marriage
The Origin of the White Wedding Dress
Understanding Women
Until We Understand Women
When Men Shop For Groceries

 

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21-Sep-2018