Redneck Hood Ornament

Caution: Deer Was On Road

The car was starting to run a little hot the last few miles



An elderly couple were on their way to Tawas City, Michigan.
They stopped at a McDonalds in Augres, just off of US Highway 23.
They didn’t realize that they had hit a deer!
Someone in McDonalds had to tell them...
Redneck Hood Ornament - car truck with dead buck deer in its grill after road accident

When is it time to turn in one’s license?

QuotaBills
A bambiraptor is a savage baby dear. - Alan Davies

Name the greatest of all inventors. Accident. - Mark Twain

I used to look like a deer in headlights on the red carpet. - Emily Blunt

Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth. - Erma Bombeck

I had to stop driving my car for a while - the tires got dizzy. - Steven Wright

Coward: One who, in a perilous emergency, thinks with his legs. - Ambrose Bierce

Living with a conscience is like driving a car with the brakes on. - Budd Schulberg

The best car safety device is a rear-view mirror with a cop in it. - Dudley Moore

If you need 100 rounds to kill a deer, maybe hunting isn't your sport. - Elayne Boosler

A private railroad car is not an acquired taste. One takes to it immediately. - Eleanor R. Belmont

You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't. - Jeff Foxworthy

When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife. - Prince Philip

Wealthy people miss one of life's greatest thrills: making the last car payment. - Unknown

I'm a Catholic deer hunter. I am happy to be clinging to my guns and my religion. - Paul Ryan

To be born free is an accident; to live free a responsibility; to die free is an obligation. - Mrs. Hubbard Davis

They say you only go around once, but with a muscle car you can go around two or three times. - Tim Allen

Yesterday I parked my car in a tow-away zone... when I came back the entire area was missing. - Steven Wright

If you're not paying for it through the health plan, you pay for it in the emergency room. - David Lehman

A suburban mother's role is to deliver children obstetrically once, and by car forever after. - Peter DeVries

The fabled musk deer searches the world over for the source of the scent which comes from itself. - Ramakrishna

I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving. - Steven Wright

When walking, you see things that you miss in a motor car or on the train. You give your mind space to ponder. - Tom Hodgkinson

Life's golden age is when the children are too old to need babysitters and too young to borrow the family car. - Unknown

I do get scared of the dentist, so a drive-through dentist might make me feel more at home. If I got to stay in my car. - Jessica Pare

Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car. - Garrison Keillor

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car. - Erma Bombeck

I'm not a car guy. The subway gets me where I need to go efficiently and cheaply, and I don't worry about traffic. - Joe Scarborough

Is fuel efficiency really what we need most desperately? I say what we really need is a car that can be shot when it breaks down. - George Carlin

Tonight we'll be talking to a car designer who's crossed Toyota with Quasimodo and come up with the Hatchback of Notre Dame. - Ronnie Corbett

I have an answering machine in my car. It says, "I'm home now. But leave a message and I'll call when I'm out." - Steven Wright

A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car; but if he has a university education, he may steal the whole railroad. - Theodore Roosevelt

Success is no accident. It is hard work, perseverance, learning, studying, sacrifice and most of all, love of what you are doing or learning to do. - Pele

When I get real bored, I like to drive downtown and get a great parking spot, then sit in my car and count how many people ask me if I'm leaving. - Steven Wright

My wife told me the car wasn't running well because there was water in the carburetor.
I asked where the car was.
She told me, "In the lake." - Red Skelton

Canada should always open its doors to those who are oppressed or in cases of emergency. When Canada offered refuge to 50,000 boat people in Vietnam in the 1970s, I was particularly proud to be Canadian. - David Suzuki

Consider the wheelbarrow. It may lack the grace of an airplane, the speed of an automobile, the initial capacity of a freight car, but its humble wheel marked out the path of what civilization we still have. - Hal Borland

Germans are flummoxed by humor, the Swiss have no concept of fun, the Spanish think there is nothing at all ridiculous about eating dinner at midnight, and the Italians should never, ever have been let in on the invention of the motor car. - Bill Bryson

I play the harmonica. The only way I can play is if I get my car going really fast, and stick it out the window. I put a new engine in my car, but forgot to take the old one out. Now my car goes 500 miles per hour. The harmonica sounds "amazing". - Steven Wright

Every kid has a toy that they believe is their best friend, that they believe communicates with them, and they imagine it being alive, their toy horse or car or whatever it is. Stop-motion is the only medium where we literally can make a toy come to life, an actual object. - Henry Selick

Al Gore, the former vice-president of the United States, lives in a mansion that uses more electricity than the average family's bungalow! David Suzuki rides on a bus that uses more fuel than a Smart car to get across Canada! And this is just the tip of the vanishing iceberg! - Linwood Barclay


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13-Dec-2017