Understanding Women

Genie in a bottle - one wish 4U...


A man walking along a California beach was deep in prayer. All of a sudden, he said out loud, “Lord grant me one wish.” Suddenly the sky clouded above his head and in a booming voice the Lord said, “Because you have TRIED to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish.”

The man said, “Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can drive over anytime I want.”

The Lord said, “Your request is very materialistic. Think of the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking. The supports required to reach the bottom of the Pacific! The concrete and steel it would take! I can do it, but it is hard for me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more time and think of another wish, a wish you think would honour and glorify me.”

The man thought about it for a long time. Finally he said, “Lord, I wish that I could understand women. I want to know how they feel inside, what they are thinking when they give me the silent treatment, why they cry, what they mean when they say “nothing”, and how I can make a woman truly happy.”

The Lord replied, “You want two lanes or four lanes on that bridge?”


QuotaBills
Candlestine romance - Archie Bunker

Marriage is not a word but a sentence. - Unknown

Marriage is the chief cause of divorce. - Groucho Marx

A happy marriage is the union of two forgivers. - Ruth Bell Graham

To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance. - Oscar Wilde

Never trust a husband too far, nor a bachelor too near. - Helen Rowland

Love is a fair garden, and marriage a field of nettles. - Finnish Proverb

Deceiving others. That is what the world calls a romance. - Oscar Wilde

There is no perfect marriage, for there are no perfect men. - French Proverb

The secret to a happy marriage? Do what your wife tells you. - Denzel Washington

Before you marry keep both eyes open; after marriage shut one. - Jamaican Proverb

Marriage: A word which should be pronounced "mirage." - Herbert Spencer

Falling in love and having a relationship are two different things. - Keanu Reeves

Most women are afraid of clowns, but somehow end up still dating one. - Unknown

There's one thing about a late marriage - it doesn't last long. - Unknown

Marriage requires a special talent like acting. Monogamy requires genius. - Warren Beatty

If you have a boat and a happy marriage, you don't need another thing. - Ed McMahon

College is a place to keep warm between high school and an early marriage. - George Gobel

Marriage is really tough because you have to deal with feelings and lawyers. - Richard Pryor

I wanted a man who wouldn't stray so I'm dating a guy on house arrest. - Kim Bove

Want to improve your relationships? See love as a verb rather than as a feeling. - Stephen R. Covey

Peppering your relationship with a dash of mystery can make it far more palatable. - Khang K. Nguyen

Marriage is one of the few institutions that allow a man to do as his wife pleases. - Milton Berle

Let us now set forth one of the fundamental truths about marriage: the wife is in charge. - Bill Cosby

Marriage is like putting your hand into a bag of snakes in the hope of pulling out an eel. - Leonardo da Vinci

As a man in a relationship, you have a simple choice: You can be right or you can be happy. - Ralphie May

The easiest kind of relationship for me is with ten thousand people. The hardest is with one. - Joan Baez

Somehow a bachelor never quite gets over the idea that he is a thing of beauty and a boy forever. - Helen Rowland

For marriage to be a success, every woman and every man should have her and his own bathroom. The end. - Catherine Zeta-Jones

I have a great relationship with the blacks. I've always had a great relationship with the blacks. - Donald Trump

Romance is thinking about your significant other, when you are supposed to be thinking about something else. - Nicholas Sparks

The most happy marriage I can picture or imagine to myself would be the union of a deaf man to a blind woman. - Samuel Taylor Coleridge

Marriage always demands the greatest understanding of the art of insincerity possible between two human beings. - Vicki Baum

Marriage is like a cage; one sees the birds outside desperate to get in, and those inside desperate to get out. - Ogden Nash

Relationships are about give and take; not tit-for-tat. If you're keeping score, you'll lose at your own game. - Faydra D. Fields

Twenty years of romance make a woman look like a ruin, but twenty years of marriage make her something like a public building. - Oscar Wilde

If the marriage needs help, the answer almost always is have more fun. Drop your list of grievances and go ride a roller coaster. - Garrison Keillor

Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who cannot sleep with the window shut, and a woman who cannot sleep with the window open. - George Bernard Shaw

One advantage of marriage is that when you fall out of love with him or he falls out of love with you, it keeps you together until you fall in again. - Judith Viorst

Fraud in business is no different from infidelity in marriage or plagiarism in scholarly work. Even people committed to high moral standards succumb. - Miroslav Volf


see also   Genie  &  Relationship  Sections
Understanding Women - Pocket Edition

A Mother’s Love
A Woman’s Mind
Bedside Non-Assistance
Before Online Dating
Everything Men Know About Women
Hormone Guide
Keyboard Wedding
Looking For Your Wife?
Looking Small
Names of the Colours
Real Man’s Point System
Romance Lost
The Origin of the White Wedding Dress
When Men Shop For Groceries
Will To Live
Winning An Argument With A Woman

 

Time Management

Melted Dog

Bible Bar

Shower Dog

Scottish Choices

Is Lunch Ready?

Food Bank Closure

Breakfast In Bed

'Turn Me Over' Pickup

Ice Cream Thief

Chocolate Bed

Uplifting Church

Touchy Subject

It's A Keeper

Horse Hearse
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19-Aug-2018