Understanding Women

Genie in a bottle - one wish 4U...


A man walking along a California beach was deep in prayer. All of a sudden, he said out loud, “Lord grant me one wish.” Suddenly the sky clouded above his head and in a booming voice the Lord said, “Because you have TRIED to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish.”

The man said, “Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can drive over anytime I want.”

The Lord said, “Your request is very materialistic. Think of the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking. The supports required to reach the bottom of the Pacific! The concrete and steel it would take! I can do it, but it is hard for me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more time and think of another wish, a wish you think would honour and glorify me.”

The man thought about it for a long time. Finally he said, “Lord, I wish that I could understand women. I want to know how they feel inside, what they are thinking when they give me the silent treatment, why they cry, what they mean when they say “nothing”, and how I can make a woman truly happy.”

The Lord replied, “You want two lanes or four lanes on that bridge?”


QuotaBills
Civilized humanical relationships - Archie Bunker

Death ends a life, not a relationship. - Jack Lemmon

A happy marriage is the union of two forgivers. - Ruth Bell Graham

Love - a temporary insanity curable by marriage. - Ambrose Bierce

Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener. - Paula Deen

Love is a fair garden, and marriage a field of nettles. - Finnish Proverb

A bachelor is a guy who never made the same mistake once. - Phyllis Diller

The proper basis for marriage is mutual misunderstanding. - Oscar Wilde

There's more to marriage than four bare legs in a bed. - English Proverb

There is no perfect marriage, for there are no perfect men. - French Proverb

Marriage is the only war in which you sleep with the enemy. - Unknown

Most women are afraid of clowns, but somehow end up still dating one. - Unknown

Marriage is better than leprosy because it's easier to get rid of. - WC Fields

Marriage requires a special talent like acting. Monogamy requires genius. - Warren Beatty

College is a place to keep warm between high school and an early marriage. - George Gobel

Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship. - Sharon Stone

I think gay marriage is something that should be between a man and a woman. - Arnold Schwarzenegger

The great majority of neuroses in women have their origin in the marriage bed. - Sigmund Freud

Peppering your relationship with a dash of mystery can make it far more palatable. - Khang K. Nguyen

Only choose in marriage a woman whom you would choose as a friend if she were a man. - Joseph Joubert

Love and respect are the most important aspects of parenting, and of all relationships. - Jodie Foster

Inspirations never go in for long engagements; they demand immediate marriage to action. - Unknown

Our marriage vows: till death do us part, for better for worse, in secrets and in health. - Archie Bunker

We seldom give each other advice - I think that's the success of 25 years of marriage. - Laura Bush

As a man in a relationship, you have a simple choice: You can be right or you can be happy. - Ralphie May

The easiest kind of relationship for me is with ten thousand people. The hardest is with one. - Joan Baez

Health is the greatest gift, contentment the greatest wealth, faithfulness the best relationship. - Buddha

The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open. - Groucho Marx

The key to a long and healthy marriage is that, honestly, there's nothing worth fighting about. - Jay Leno

Wit is the sudden marriage of ideas which before their union were not perceived to have any relation. - Mark Twain

My husband always felt that a marriage and career don't mix. That's why he's never worked. - Phyllis Diller

There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage. - Sam Kinison

Remember that your best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other. - Unknown

Relationships are about give and take; not tit-for-tat. If you're keeping score, you'll lose at your own game. - Faydra D. Fields

The quality of your life is determined by the quality of your relationships. The quality of your business is no different. - Harvey Mackay

The greatest mistake we humans make in our relationships: we listen half, understand quarter, think zero, and react double. - Unknown

It's a funny relationship that makeup artists have. I always feel kind of like a dentist. People look at me and think of pain. - Rick Baker

Your marriage is in trouble if your wife says, 'You're only interested in one thing,' and you can't remember what it is. - Milton Berle

In every marriage more than a week old, there are grounds for divorce. The trick is to find, and continue to find, grounds for marriage. - Robert Anderson

Fraud in business is no different from infidelity in marriage or plagiarism in scholarly work. Even people committed to high moral standards succumb. - Miroslav Volf


see also   Genie  &  Relationship  Sections
Understanding Women - Pocket Edition

A Mother’s Love
A Woman’s Mind
Bedside Non-Assistance
Before Online Dating
Everything Men Know About Women
Hormone Guide
Keyboard Wedding
Looking For Your Wife?
Looking Small
Names of the Colours
Real Man’s Point System
Romance Lost
The Origin of the White Wedding Dress
When Men Shop For Groceries
Will To Live
Winning An Argument With A Woman

 

Nose For Coke

Crisp Chips

3 Stages Of A Man's Life

Tipsy Crane

Clear View

Redneck Ladder

Home Depot Delivery

Taco Bell Secret Seasoning

Are You OK?

Downchuck

Rickshaw Workout

Tenacity

Annual Meeting of Women Drivers

Bach Flip

Alien Smuggling
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24-Aug-2019