Take The Bus

New way to avoid any .05 alcohol issues while driving


I went out with some friends last night and tied one on. I got really plastered.

Knowing that I was wasted, I did something that I have never done before. I took the bus home.

I arrived safe and warm, which seemed really surprising as I have never driven a bus before.


QuotaBills
Wine is bottled poetry. - Robert Louis Stevenson

Beer speaks. People mumble. - Tony McGee

In wine, there is the truth. - Pliny the Elder

When the wine is in, the wit is out. - English Proverb

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. - Unknown

When wine goes in strange things come out. - Friedrich Schiller

Every cask smells of the wine it contains. - Spanish Proverb

It's too late Edith, my bus has sailed. - Archie Bunker

Beer. Now there's a temporary solution. - Homer Simpson

I'm Hybrid. I run on chocolate and wine. - Unknown

Step aside Coffee. This is a job for Alcohol. - Unknown

When life hands you lemons, make whiskey sours. - WC Fields

As a cure for worrying, work is better than whiskey. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

I should never have switched from Scotch to martinis. - Humphrey Bogart

I cook with wine; sometimes I even add it to the food. - WC Fields

It was 2:00 p.m., too early for wine but not for chocolate. - Andrea Hurst

I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already. - Tommy Cooper

Stop trying to make everybody happy - you're not tequila. - Unknown

Drinking rum before noon makes you a pirate, not an alcoholic. - Unknown

I never drank anything stronger than beer before I was twelve. - WC Fields

God invented whiskey to prevent the Irish from ruling the world. - Irish Saying

Champagne for my real friends and real pain for my sham friends. - Tom Waits

You ought to get out of those wet clothes and into a dry martini. - Mae West

I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me. - Winston Churchill

Give me a woman who truly loves beer and I will conquer the world. - Kaiser Willhelm II

In heaven there is no beer...
That's why we drink ours here. - Unknown

Men are like wine. Some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age. - Pope John XXIII

A raise is like a martini: it elevates the spirit, but only temporarily. - Dan Seligman

To alcohol! The cause of - and solution to - all of life's problems. - Homer Simpson

Never marry anyone you could not sit next to during a three-day bus trip. - Roger Ebert

In 1969 I gave up women and alcohol - it was the worst 20 minutes of my life. - George Best

You can lead a horse to water but I'd rather ride it to the liquor store. - Wayne Nowazek

Whiskey is by far the most popular of all remedies that won't cure a cold. - Jerry Vale

One of the disadvantages of wine is that it makes a man mistake words for thoughts. - Samuel Johnson

I'll bring ya a bottle of champagne. Maybe I'll even bring home a whole maggot. - Archie Bunker

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke

You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar. - Groucho Marx

My heart says chocolate and wine but my jeans say, for the love of God women, eat a salad. - Unknown

Measure thy life by loss instead of gain, not by the wine drunk, but the wine poured forth. - Harriet King

There's an old saying, "Ya don't keep runnin' after you catch the bus." - Archie Bunker

I don't drink these days. I am allergic to alcohol and narcotics. I break out in handcuffs. - Robert Downey Jr.

Every form of addiction is bad, no matter whether the narcotic be alcohol or morphine or idealism. - Carl Jung

If you have to choose between drinking wine every day or being skinny, which would you choose: Red or White? - Unknown

Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat. - Alex Levine

Ninety percent I'll spend on good times, women and Irish Whiskey. The other ten percent I'll probably waste. - Tug McGraw

We have embarked upon the world's largest and longest cocktail party, and every issue imaginable is up for grabs. - Geoffrey Moore

It was so quiet, a reservation kind of quiet, where you can hear somebody drinking whiskey on the rocks three miles away. - Sherman Alexie

Irish whiskey was first developed for its medicinal benefits. It's just lucky for the rest of us that the Irish are such a sickly bunch. - Unknown

Morals are not, like bacon, to be cured by hanging; nor, like wine, to be improved by sea voyages; nor, like honey, to be preserved in cells. - William Taylor

If you sang "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall" and counted all the numbers mentioned throughout the entire song, it would add up to 14,850. - the Joe-kster


see also   Bar  &  Travel   Sections
Bus Head Rest
Bus Wait Weight
Cold Weather Travel Warning
Deluxembourg
Designated Driver
Drink Refill
Safe Drive Home

 

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24-Aug-2019