Fatherly Advice

Dad & Son talk... be-fore it’s too late!


A father spoke to his son, “It’s time we had a little talk, my son. Soon you will have urges and feelings you’ve never had before. Your heart will pound and your hands will sweat. You’ll be preoccupied and won’t be able to think of anything else.”

He added, “But don’t worry, it’s perfectly normal... it’s called golf.”


QuotaBills
The Child is father of the Man. - William Wordsworth

Golf is a puzzle without an answer. - Gary Player

A father is a banker provided by nature. - French Proverb

It is a wise father that knows his own child. - William Shakespeare

Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do. - Luke 23:24

The uglier a man's legs are, the better he plays golf. - H G Wells

My Father had a profound influence on me, he was a lunatic. - Spike Milligan

The income tax has made liars out of more Americans than golf. - Will Rogers

Hold me, grip me, cherish me, pretend that I'm a golf club! - Unknown

Golf is a game where the ball lies poorly, and the players well. - Unknown

When I die, bury me on the golf course so my husband will visit. - Unknown

My father... one of the great immorals, er, immortals, of our time. - WC Fields

I got a new set of golf clubs for my husband. Best trade I ever made. - Unknown

My father would take me to the playground, and put me on mood swings. - Jay London

Golf is a game in which you yell fore, shoot six, and write down five. - Paul Harvey

Blessed indeed is the man who hears many gentle voices call him father! - Lydia Child

If you break 100, watch your golf. If you break 80, watch your business. - Joey Adams

How has retirement affected my golf game? A lot more people beat me now. - Dwight D Eisenhower

One advantage of golf over bowling is that you never lose a bowling ball. - Don Carter

It doesn't matter who my father was; it matters who I remember he was. - Anne Sexton

Don't talk about a rope in the house of someone whose father was hung. - Colin Farrell

The Pirate is surrealism and so, in a curious way, is Father of the Bride. - Vincente Minnelli

Those who slew my father I drove into exile... and defeated them in battle. - Augustus

Retirement means no pressure, no stress, no heartache... unless you play golf. - Gene Perret

Humour is based on a modicum of truth. Ever heard a joe-k about a father-in-law? - Dick Clark

My father used to say, "Don't raise your voice. Improve your argument." - Desmond Tutu

Golf is the worst drug in the world. You just keep coming back fro more embarrassment. - Deacon Jones

Sometimes the game of golf is just too difficult to endure with a golf club in your hands. - Bobby Jones

It is almost impossible to remember how tragic a place the world is when one is playing golf. - Robert Lynd

They say that life is a lot like golf - don't believe them. Golf is a lot more complicated. - Gardner Dickinson

Don't you just hate it when you try to think of something other than golf... and you can't? - Mike Purkey

I want to die like my father; peacefully in his sleep, not screaming and terrified, like his passengers. - Bob Monkhouse

If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play it, it's recreation. If you work at it, it's golf. - Bob Hope

Give me my golf clubs, fresh air, and a beautiful partner, and you can keep my golf clubs and the fresh air. - Jack Benny

That he delights in the misery of others no man will confess, and yet what other motive can make a father cruel? - Joseph Addison

Long ago, when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft. Today, it's called golf. - Unknown

I still play hockey every now and then, and I still golf. But my biggest exercise is walking my big dog in the park every day. - Michael J. Fox

Golf is a game whose aim is to hit a very small ball into an even smaller hole, with weapons singularly ill designed for the purpose. - Winston Churchill

My father said there were two kinds of people in the world: givers and takers. The takers may eat better, but the givers sleep better. - Marlo Thomas

Luke, you can destroy the Emperor. He has foreseen this. It is your destiny. Join me, and together we can rule the galaxy as father and son. - Darth Vader


see also   Golf  Section
Father Sayings for Father’s Day
Father’s Day Selfie
Ways to say “Dad” in Different Languages

 

Don't Get Your Head In A Knot

Cornfield Fishing

Dawn Gone

Highest Human Position In The World

Together Since

You Never Call

CLUMSY Driver

Water Short

Post Research

Motorcycle Taxi

Columbia Street Party

Fly By Meal

Down Day

Hanging Out With Friends

You Want Me To Do What?

Mirror Lake

Kitchen Thing

Light Road

Coffee Spoon

Show Stopper
Full list of creditsFacebookTwitterDiggStumbleUponDelicious

20-Aug-2019