Hospital Gown Insurance or Ass-urance?

Q: How is a Hospital Gown like insurance?
A: You’re never covered as much as you think you are.



Hospital Gown Insurance and Assurance

Why ICU is an acronym for Hospital Gowns

QuotaBills
Laughter is the best medicine. - the Joe-kster

Caring is the essence of nursing. - Jean Watson

In a mad world only the mad are sane. - Akira Kurosawa

Surgery is the cry of defeat in medicine. - Martin H. Fischer

God heals, and the doctor takes the fees. - Benjamin Franklin

The best doctor gives the least medicines. - Benjamin Franklin

Hollywood is an asylum run by the inmates. - Laurence Stallings

Show me a sane man and I will cure him for you. - Carl Jung

An asylum for the sane would be empty in America. - George Bernard Shaw

Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. - Erma Bombeck

A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running. - Groucho Marx

Five exclamation marks, the sure sign of an insane mind. - Terry Pratchett

Sometimes the appropriate response to reality is to go insane. - Philip K. Dick

A smart mother makes often a better diagnosis than a poor doctor. - August Bier

The worst thing about medicine is that one kind makes another necessary. - Elbert Hubbard

A woman doctor is only good for women's problems - like your groinocology - Archie Bunker

To array a man's will against his sickness is the supreme art of medicine. - Henry Ward Beecher

This is a sharp medicine, but it is a physician for all diseases and miseries. - Sir Walter Raleigh

A hospital should also have a recovery room adjoining the cashier's office. - Francis O'Walsh

If you are too smart to pay the doctor, you had better be too smart to get ill. - African Proverb

Oh, when I was a kid, I was ugly. When I was born, the doctor smacked my mother. - Rodney Dangerfield

The best doctors in the world are Doctor Diet, Doctor Quiet, and Doctor Merryman. - Jonathan Swift

The art of medicine consists in amusing the patient while nature cures the disease. - Voltaire

The only medicine for suffering, crime, and all the other woes of mankind, is wisdom. - Thomas Huxley

I wonder why you can always read a Doctor's bill but you can never read his prescription. - Finley Peter Dunne

And those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

I wondher why ye can always read a doctor's bill an' ye niver can read his purscription. - Finley Peter Dunne

Kindness and a generous spirit go a long way. And a sense of humor. It's like medicine - very healing. - Max Irons

The doctor sees all the weakness of mankind, the lawyer all the wickedness, the theologian all the stupidity. - Arthur Schopenhauer

Even if the doctor does not give you a year ... make one brave push and see what can be accomplished in a week. - Robert Louis Stevenson

Following his doctor's orders, Nikita (Khrushchev) has cut his drinking in half. He's leaving out the water. - Bob Hope

The doctor may also learn more about the illness from the way the patient tells the story than from the story itself. - James B. Herrick

The trained nurse has become one of the great blessings of humanity, taking a place beside the physician and the priest. - William Osler

My doctor recently told me that jogging could add years to my life. I think he was right. I feel ten years older already. - Milton Berle

A good friend is a connection to life - a tie to the past, a road to the future, the key to sanity in a totally insane world. - Lois Wyse

A doctor must work eighteen hours a day and seven days a week. If you cannot console yourself to this, get out of the profession. - Martin H. Fischer

I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away. - George Carlin

When I was born the doctor came out to the waiting room and told my father, "We did everything we could... but he pulled through." - Rodney Dangerfield

Among creatures born into chaos, a majority will imagine an order, a minority will question the order, and the rest will be pronounced insane. - Robert Brault

Just be good and kind to your children. Not only are they the future of the world, they're the ones who can sign you into the nursing home. - Dennis Miller


see also   Hospital  Section
Alzheimer’s or Parkinson’s?
Bed Friends
Big Birth - They Start Off Big At This Hospital
Brain Transplant
Camping For Seniors
Cell Phone For Seniors
Coke Dispenser
Corn Maze For Old People
Daily Exercise for Seniors
Dementia Purse
Dementia Relations
Dr. Paul Dhillon - Sierra Leone Ebola Clinic
Dreams Come True
Handicap Porch
Hedge Face
Hopscotch for Seniors
Hospital Friends
Is Laughter The Best Medicine?
Mal Nutrition
Manitoba Health Care’s Test For Alzheimers
Mechanical Patient
Once A Kid, Always A Kid
Redneck ATV
Redneck Wheelchair Stroller
Senile Agitation
Senior Center Reminder
Snow Birth
Time For a Trade-In?
Winter Tree
Working Past 65
Worst Aid

 

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21-Apr-2018