Atheist Professor

Religious brain child


A college class was led by an atheist professor, and every day he’d stand in front of his class and say, “Have you ever seen God?” to which nobody would answer. Then he’d ask, “Have you ever felt God?” and nobody would answer. Finally he’d ask, “Have you ever heard God?” and, like the other times, nobody would answer. He then would say, “It is obvious that there is no God.”

One day a Christian student had been having an extremely bad day: her car broke down, her mother was sick, her boyfriend was out of town, and she’d gotten a bad grade on one of her exams. She had been fed up with her professor’s little act every morning, so she decided to do something about it.

While the professor stood up at the beginning of class and did his thing, the student had an idea. She got up and said, “Professor, would you mind if I said something?”
He said, “Of course not. This is an expressive classroom, and I think it would be fine if you spoke your mind.”

The girl said to the class, “Have you ever seen our professor’s brain?” and nobody answered. Then she asked, “Have you ever felt our professor’s brain?” and nobody answered. Finally she asked, “Have you ever heard our professor’s brain?” and, like the other times, nobody answered.

She then said, “It is quite obvious that our professor has no brain.”




QuotaBills
What has God wrought? - Samuel Morse

The brain is wider than the sky. - Emily Dickinson

God, please save me from your followers! - Unknown

If God be for us, who can be against us? - Romans 8:31

Faith which does not doubt is dead faith. - Miguel de Unamuno

Ultimately, blind faith is the only kind. - Mason Cooley

God Bless America, written by Milton Berlin. - Archie Bunker

Will no one rid me of this turbulent priest? - Henry II

Friends are God's apology for relatives. - Hugh Kingsmill

Faith is believing what you know ain't so. - Mark Twain

Some Catlick priest sprinkling incest over everyone. - Archie Bunker

The atheist religion don't believe in the bible. - Archie Bunker

Love beauty; it is the shadow of God on the universe. - Gabriela Mistral

God, it seems, is a verb, not a noun, proper or improper. - R Buckminster Fuller

Praise is the only gift for which people are really grateful. - Marguerite

God never sent hunger without sending something to satisfy it. - Ireland Proverb

What a lover's heart knows let no man's brain dispute. - Aberjhani

God gave us our memories so that we might have roses in December. - James M Barrie

You can do very little with faith, but you can do nothing without it. - Samuel Butler

Prayer is when you talk to God; meditation is when you listen to God. - Diana Robinson

And God saw everything that he had made, and behold, it was very good. - Genesis 1:31

Troubles are often the tools by which God fashions us for better things. - Henry Ward Beecher

God gets you to the plate, but once you're there you're on your own. - Ted Williams

If a door slams shut it means that God is pointing to an open door further on down. - Anna Delaney Peale

Any concern too small to be turned into a prayer is too small to be made into a burden. - Corrie ten Boom

All of us are guinea pigs in the laboratory of God. Humanity is just a work in progress. - Tennessee Williams

It is the final proof of God's omnipotence that he need not exist in order to save us. - Peter De Vries

I don't see anywhere in the Bible where it says you shouldn't get breast implants. - Carrie Prejean

Art is a collaboration between God and the artist, and the less the artist does the better. - Andre Gide

I always distrust people who know so much about what God wants them to do to their fellows. - Susan B Anthony

Religion is like a map. The route isn't important. It's the destination that matters. - Marianne Williamson

The value of persistent prayer is not that he will hear us, but that we will finally hear him. - William McGill

There is much in the world to make us afraid. There is much more in our faith to make us unafraid. - Frederick W. Cropp

I have an everyday religion that works for me. Love yourself first, and everything else falls in to line. - Lucille Ball

It ain't those parts of the Bible that I can't understand that bother me, it is the parts that I do understand. - Mark Twain

The Bible's full of wine. God ain't got nothing against a little drink to celebrate His Son's birthday with. - Archie Bunker

I went to a Catholic boys' school for a year, but that was to play hockey. Religion class was quite contentious for me. - Keanu Reeves

It is a press, certainly, but a press from which shall flow in inexhaustible streams... through it, God will spread his word. - Johannes Gutenberg

Englishmen learn Christ's law best in English. Moses heard God's law in his own tongue; so did Christ's apostles. - John Wycliffe

Be yourself no matter what other people think. God made you the way you are for a reason. Besides, an original is always worth more than a copy! - Unknown


see also   Religious  Section
Brain Logic

Ain’t Peter's Place
All Dogs Go To Heaven
An Evening Prayer
Autographed Copy
Biblical Humour
Breakable Postal Package
Catch Up With Jesus
Church Sign Generator
Church Sign Messages
Church Signs
Da End Iss Near
Daily Inspiration
Day of Light and Darkness
Dead Sea Fish
Equal Rights Church
For Your Synths
God’s Little Instructions
Golfing Nun
Halo to the Holy Dog
How To Tweet Others
In-Spired Safety Tip
Job Interview With God
John The Baptist Souvenirs
Letters to God - From Children
New School Prayer
Organ Donor
Please Help My Car
Rabbi Road
Redneck Revenge
Reformed Buddhists
Superior Church
The End Is Near
The Eye of God
The Very First King Size Bed
Wash Away Sins
With The Pope
World’s Oldest Menorah
Youth Pastor’s Last Speech

 

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20-Aug-2019