Redneck Dog House

Redneck’s home for old dogs, young dogs & several stupid dogs



Redneck Dog House

QuotaBills
A hard dog to keep on the porch. - Hillary Clinton

Our dog died from licking our wedding picture. - Phyllis Diller

A spotless house is a sign of a misspent life. - Unknown

There will be no whitewash at the White House. - Richard M Nixon

At my house, Dust is a noun, not a verb. - Unknown

Choose your neighbor before you buy your house. - African Proverb

Maybe I should just go home and ride my tractor. - Chuck Grassley

Pedestrian: a man whose son is home from college. - Unknown

Every strike brings me closer to the next home run. - Babe Ruth

I spilled spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone. - Steven Wright

Anybody who hates dogs and babies can't be all bad. - Leo Rosten

I just heard from Bill Bailey. He's not coming home. - Henny Youngman

He taught me housekeeping; when I divorce I keep the house. - Zsa Zsa Gabor

There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home. - Ken Olson

To be happy in the home is the ultimate result of all ambition. - Samuel Johnson

Go often to the house of a friend, for weeds choke the unused path. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

I have nothing against dogs. I just hate rugs that go squish-squish. - Phyllis Diller

I will clean house when Sears comes out with a riding vacuum cleaner. - Roseanne Barr

Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you. - Mary Bly

I wanted a man who wouldn't stray so I'm dating a guy on house arrest. - Kim Bove

On stage I make love to twenty five thousand people; and then I go home alone. - Janis Joplin

I wouldn't run for President. I wouldn't want to move to a smaller house. - Bono

I have only one superstition. I make sure I touch all bases when I hit a home run. - Babe Ruth

Strength of character may be learned at work, but beauty of character is learned at home. - Henry Drummond

People say satire is dead. It's not dead; it's alive and living in the White House. - Robin Williams

Anyone who has been to an English public school will always feel comparatively at home in prison. - Unknown

People travel to faraway places to watch, in fascination, the kind of people they ignore at home. - Dagobert D. Runes

Don't make the mistake of treating your dogs like humans, or they'll treat you like dogs. - Martha Scott

You have a cough? Go home tonight, eat a whole box of Ex-Lax - tomorrow you'll be afraid to cough. - Pearl Williams

Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing is like shovelling the walk before it stops snowing. - Phyllis Diller

All the plants in my house are dead - I shot them last night. I was teasing them by watering them with ice cubes. - Steven Wright

A girl phoned me the other day and said, "Come on over, nobody's home." I went over. Nobody was home. - Rodney Dangerfield

You reached into my soul and rearranged the position of my bones,
You rebuilt my rib cage so your heart could be home. - Unknown

My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide whether to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives. - Rita Rudner

One need not be a chamber to be haunted;
One need not be a house;
The brain has corridors surpassing
Material place. - Emily Dickinson

The worst thing about work in the house or home is that whatever you do it is destroyed, laid waste or eaten within twenty-four hours. - Lady Hasluck

An expert is somebody who is more than fifty miles from home, has no responsibility for implementing the advice he gives, and shows slides. - Edwin Meese

Among God's creatures two, the dog and the guitar, have taken all the sizes and all the shapes, in order not to be separated from the man. - Andres Segovia

Dogs display reluctance and wrath
If you try to give them a bath;
They bury bones in hideaways
And half the time they trot sideaways. - Ogden Nash

This is a honeydew day. That is when you get a day off and the wife says, "Honey, do this," and "Honey, do that" around the house. - Jim Lemon


see also   Dog  &  Redneck  Sections
In The Dog House
Redneck B&B

 

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19-Jul-2019