No Fee Chinese Detective

Looking for the Wong person

[A man suspected his wife was seeing another man, so he hired the famous Chinese detective, Chen Lee, to watch and report any activities while he was gone. A few days later, he received this report...]

MOST HONOURABLE SIR:

YOU LEAVE HOUSE. I WATCH HOUSE.
HE COME TO HOUSE. I WATCH.
HE AND SHE LEAVE HOUSE, I FOLLOW.
HE AND SHE GO IN HOTEL.
I CLIMB TREE. I LOOK IN WINDOW.
HE KISS SHE. SHE KISS HE.
HE STRIP SHE. SHE STRIP HE.
HE PLAY WITH SHE. SHE PLAY WITH HE.
I PLAY WITH ME.
I FALL OFF TREE.
I NOT SEE.

NO FEE,
CHEN LEE


QuotaBills
Justice is truth in action. - Benjamin Disraeli

The law is silent during war. - Cicero

Common sense often makes good law. - William O Douglas

A bad compromise beats a good lawsuit. - Saying

99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name. - Steven Wright

The good of the people is the chief law. - Cicero

Don't judge folks by their relatives. - Unknown

We judge of man's wisdom by his hope. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Law cannot persuade where it cannot punish. - Thomas Fuller

Law and order are not necessarily partners. - Saying

Our ancestors ... were laborers, not lawyers. - Thomas Jefferson

I'm trusting in the Lord and a good lawyer. - Oliver North

It is not wisdom but authority that makes a law. - Thomas Hobbes

Going to law is losing a cow for the sake of a cat. - Mark Twain

Lawyers are men who hire out their words and anger. - Martial

I have always fought for concrete facts, for justice. - Fidel Castro

Judge a man by his questions rather than his answers. - Voltaire

The first thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers. - William Shakespeare

Justice is a law of nature rarely found in human affairs. - Unknown

In the Halls of Justice, the only justice is in the halls. - Lenny Bruce

The innkeeper loves the drunkard, but not for a son-in-law. - Yiddish Proverb

People hasten to judge in order not to be judged themselves. - Albert Camus

Behind every successful man stands a surprised mother-in-law. - Hubert Humphrey

Don't judge me by my past. I don't live there anymore. - Unknown

A lawyer's opinion is worth nothing unless it is paid for. - Unknown

Do not judge a man until you have walked two moons in his moccasins. - Native American Proverb

Books should be tried by a judge and jury as though they were crimes. - Samuel Butler

If you have ten thousand regulations you destroy all respect for the law. - Winston Churchill

True friends don't judge each other, they judge other people together. - Unknown

The only thing a lawyer won't question is the legitimacy of his mother. - WC Fields

I just got back from a pleasure trip. I took my mother-in-law to the airport. - Henny Youngman

Litigation: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage. - Ambrose Bierce

True peace is not merely the absence of tension; it is the presence of justice. - Martin Luther King, Jr.

Under the English legal system you are innocent until you are shown to be Irish. - Ted Whitehead

If a law is unjust, a man is not only right to disobey, he is obligated to do so. - Thomas Jefferson

A jury consists of twelve people who determine which client has the better lawyer. - Robert Frost

I busted a mirror and got seven years bad luck, but my lawyer thinks he can get me five. - Steven Wright

Justice is the insurance we have on our lives, and obedience is the premium we pay for it. - William Penn

My husband and I had our best sex during our divorce. It was like cheating on our lawyers. - Priscilla Lopez

Only one thing is impossible for God: To find any sense in any copyright law on the planet. - Mark Twain

The practice of medicine occurs even in primitive society, but law accompanies civilization. - Saying

If two friends ask you to judge a dispute, don't accept, because you will lose one friend. - St. Augustine

Do not judge me by my successes, judge me by how many times I fell down and got back up again. - Nelson Mandela

Shakespeare said pretty well everything and what he left out, James Joyce, with a judge from meself, put in. - Brendan Behan

Whenever men take the law into their own hands, the loser is the law. And when the law loses, freedom languishes. - Robert Kennedy

No oppression is so heavy or lasting as that which is inflicted by the perversion and exorbitance of legal authority. - Joseph Addison

When the law no longer protects you from the corrupt, but protects the corrupt from you, you know your nation is doomed. - Ayn Rand

I sometimes wish that people would put a little more emphasis upon the observance of the law than they do upon its enforcement. - Calvin Coolidge

We discern across the centuries a commanding and versatile intelligence, wielding with equal force the sword of war and of justice. - Winston Churchill

Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid. - Albert Einstein


see also   Detective  Section
Chinese Law School
Chinese Proverbs
Chinese Shoelusion
Chinese Sudoku
Chinese to English Translation
Chu Your Food Well
Fortune Cookies - In Bed
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16-Jun-2019