iGifts

Technology can get you in trouble



It all began with an iPhone. March was when my son
celebrated his 15th birthday, and I got him an iPhone.
He just loved it. Who wouldn’t?


I celebrated my birthday in July, and my wife made me
very happy when she bought me an iPad.


My daughter’s birthday was in August so
I got her an iPod Touch.


September came by, so for her birthday i got my wife an iRon.
iGifts iRon - technology can get you in trouble

It was around then that the fight started. What the wife
failed to recognize is that the iRon can be integrated into
the home network with the iWash, iCook and iClean.
(Warning: this inevitably activates the iNag reminder service)

I hope to be out of the hospital by Christmas...


QuotaBills
The woman that deliberates is lost. - Joseph Addison

Marriage is the chief cause of divorce. - Groucho Marx

Put the light out, and all women are alike. - German Proverb

Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes. - Jim Carrey

I like men who have a future and women who have a past. - Oscar Wilde

I only take Viagra when I'm with more than one woman. - Jack Nicholson

Marriage is the only war in which you sleep with the enemy. - Unknown

To give anything less than your best is to sacrifice the gift. - Steve Prefontaine

The only place men want depth in a woman is in her decolletage. - Zsa Zsa Gabor

Love is what happens to men and women who don’t know each other. - W Somerset Maugham

When women kiss it always reminds one of prize fighters shaking hands. - H L Mencken

Every politician should have been born an orphan and remain a bachelor. - Lady Bird Johnson

Marriage, like a submarine, is only safe if you get all the way inside. - Frank Pittman

If women can be railroad workers in Russia, why can't they fly in space? - Valentina Tereshkova

A woman's best love letters are always written to the man she is betraying. - Lawrence Durrell

It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has exceeded our humanity. - Albert Einstein

A man's face is his autobiography. A woman's face is her work of fiction. - Oscar Wilde

Enthusiasm is a vital element toward the individual success of every man or woman. - Conrad Hilton

And what is better than wisdom? Woman. And what is better than a good woman? Nothing. - Geoffrey Chaucer

I believe in tying the marriage knot, as long as it's around the woman's neck. - WC Fields

When once a woman has given you her heart, you can never get rid of the rest of her body. - John Vanbrugh

Make pumpkin bread as the default gift for everyone. It is cheap, it is beloved, it is carbs. - Karen Bender

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea. - Robert A. Heinlein

Women have a wonderful instinct about things. They can discover everything except the obvious. - Oscar Wilde

Feminism was established so as to allow unattractive women access to the mainstream of society. - Rush Limbaugh

Some old women and men grow bitter with age. The more their teeth drop out, the more biting they get. - George D. Prentice

Marriage is the only known example of the happy meeting of the immovable object and the irresistible force. - Ogden Nash

There goes a woman who knows all the things that can be taught and none of the things that cannot be taught. - Coco Chanel

We are each given a limitless capacity to love and attain wisdom. The extent we use these gifts is our choice. - Anthony Douglas

We in the industry know that behind every successful screenwriter stands a woman. And behind her stands his wife. - Groucho Marx

The scorn men express for a male who does housework is exceeded only by their aversion to a woman who doesn't. - Penny Kome

I wanted to be the first woman to burn her bra, but it would have taken the fire department four days to put it out. - Dolly Parton

Somewhere on this globe, every ten seconds, there is a woman giving birth to a child. She must be found and stopped. - Sam Levenson

I like the West. That's where men are men and women are women, and it's hard to beat a combination like that. - Milton Berle

Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is God's Gift. That's why we call it the 'Present.' - Bill Keane

The circumstances of one's birth are irrelevant. It is what you do with the gift of life that determines who you are. - Mewtwo

For two people in a marriage to live together day after day is unquestionably the only miracle the Vatican has overlooked. - Bill Cosby

Men want the same thing from their underwear that they want from women: a little bit of support, and a little bit of freedom. - Jerry Seinfeld

I was just so lucky with 'Real Women Have Curves.' At that point, I would have done an insurance commercial. I would have done anything. - America Ferrera

A woman with confidence is hypnotic. A smile is mesmerizing. Presence, openness, a sense of humor - these are all things that make a woman attractive. - Jessica Ortner


see also   Birthday,  Hospital,  Marriage,  Shopping  &  Stress  Sections
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iPhone Evolution
iPottie
Iron Deposit
Mission Gap - for Men & Women
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Names of the Colours
Real Iron Man Competition
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19-Feb-2019