Play Cat

A baby is an inestimable blessing and a bother. - Mark Twain

Ever notice how baby shampoo smells like spring? - Toni Sorenson

Dogs can't operate an MRI machine but cats can. - Unknown

With kids, the days are long, but the years are short. - John Leguizamo

A baby is God's opinion that the world should go on. - Carl Sandburg

You know what's cool? My kids think I'm ordinary. - Michael J. Fox

Every baby born into the world is a finer one than the last. - Charles Dickens

Women's clothes: never wear anything that panics the cat. - P.J. O'Rourke

On Halloween, the parents sent their kids out looking like me. - Rodney Dangerfield

We've had bad luck with our kids - they've all grown up. - Christopher Morley

People that hate cats will come back as mice in their next life. - Faith Resnick

When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them. - Rodney Dangerfield

I love you like crazy, baby
'Cuz I'd go crazy without you. - Pixie Foudre

It was a great interview process. They were fighting like cats and dogs. - Donald Trump

Kids: they dance before they learn there is anything that isn't music. - William Stafford

Baby: a loud noise at one end and no sense of responsibility at the other. - Ronald Knox

Oh, when I was a kid, I was ugly. When I was born, the doctor smacked my mother. - Rodney Dangerfield

When a kid says "smell my hand," it almost never smells like cinnamon. - Brian P. Cleary

All kids need is a little help, a little hope, and somebody who believes in them. - Earvin "Magic" Johnson

The most effective form of birth control I know is spending the day with my kids. - Jill Bensley

When I was a kid, I used to think pork chops and karate chops were the same thing. - Shane Koyczan

Having a baby is like falling in love again, both with your husband and your child. - Tina Brown

If man could be crossed with the cat, it would improve man, but deteriorate the cat. - Mark Twain

My wife and I have a tradition of popcorn and videos with our kids on Friday evenings. - Ozwald Boateng

I am who I am: an Irish Catholic kid, working class from Long Island. And I made it big. - Bill O'Reilly

If we would listen to our kids, we'd discover that they are largely self-explanatory. - Robert Brault

I want to have a bunch of kids so I can open a factory and have free labor. Beat that, China! - Jarod Kintz

You know how kids dream of being soccer players or actors? Well, my dream was to be a sushi chef. - Nobu Matsuhisa

When I go home, I play with my baby dolls and strollers and diaper bags, and play with my sisters. - Dakota Fanning

I'm beginning to have morning sickness. I'm not having a baby, I'm just sick of morning. - Phyllis Diller

No matter how long we've been together Edith, you still, as the kids say, "turn me over." - Archie Bunker

You know what it's like having five kids? Imagine you're drowning. And someone hands you a baby. - Jim Gaffigan

Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing is like shovelling the walk before it stops snowing. - Phyllis Diller

When witches go riding and black cats are seen,
The moon laughs and whispers, 'tis near Halloween. - Unknown

I never used to like babies. I'd always thought if a baby were more like a chimpanzee, I'd have one. - Candice Bergen

Here lies my past.
Good-bye I have kissed it;
Thank you, kids.
I wouldn’t have missed it. - Ogden Nash

I want my kids to have the things in life that I never had when I was growing up. Things like beards and chest hair. - Jarod Kintz

When I was a kid, one cop could have taken care of the whole neighborhood. Now, one cop wouldn't be safe in the neighborhood. - Mike Royko

I'm not a bad guy! I work hard, and I love my kids. So why should I spend half my Sunday hearing about how I'm going to hell? - Homer Simpson

Like all parents, my husband and I just do the best we can, and hold our breath and hope we've set aside enough money for our kids' therapy. - Michelle Pfeiffer