Real Man’s Point System

How to deal with women


For thousands of years, men have tried to understand the rules when dealing with women. Finally, this merit/demerit guide will help you to understand just how it works. Remember, in the world of romance, one single rule applies: Make the woman happy. Do something she likes, and you get points. Do something she dislikes and points are subtracted. You don’t get any points for doing something she expects…

SIMPLE DUTIES
You make the bed… +1
You make the bed, but forget to add the decorative pillows… 0
You throw the bedspread over rumpled sheets… -1
You leave the toilet seat up… -5
You replace the toilet paper roll when it is empty… 0
When the toilet paper roll is empty, you resort to Kleenex... -10
When the Kleenex runs out you use the next bathroom… -20
You go out to buy her extra-light panty liners with wings… +15
In the snow… +28
But return with beer… -5
And no liners… -25
You check out a suspicious noise at night… 0
You check out a suspicious noise and it is nothing… 0
You check out a suspicious noise and it is something… +5
You pummel it with a six iron… +10
It’s her cat… -40

AT THE PARTY
You stay by her side the entire party… 0
You stay by her side for a while, then leave to chat with a College drinking buddy… -2
Named Tiffany… -4
Tiffany is a dancer… -10
With breast implants… -18

HER BIRTHDAY
You remember her birthday… 0
You buy a card and flowers… 0
You take her out to dinner… 0
You take her out to dinner and it’s not a sports bar… +1
Okay, it is a sports bar… -2
And it’s all-you-can-eat night… -3
It’s a sports bar, its all-you-can-eat night, and your face is painted the colours of your favorite team… -10

A NIGHT OUT WITH THE BOYS
Go with a pal… 0
The pal is happily married… +1
The pal is single… -7
He drives a Ferrari… -10
With a personalized license plate (GR8NBED)… -15

A NIGHT OUT WITH HER
You take her to a movie… +2
You take her to a movie she likes… +4
You take her to a movie you hate… +6
You take her to a movie you like… -2
It’s called Death Cop III… -3
Which features Cyborgs that eat humans… -9
You lied and said it was a foreign film about orphans… -15

YOUR PHYSIQUE
You develop a noticeable pot belly… -15
You develop a noticeable pot belly & exercise to get rid of it… +10
You develop a noticeable pot belly and resort to loose jeans and baggy Hawaiian shirts… -30
You say, “It doesn’t matter, you have one too”… -800

THE BIG QUESTION:  She asks, “Does this dress make me look fat?”
You hesitate in responding… -10
You reply, “Where?”… -35
You reply, “No, I think it’s your ass”… -100
Any other response… -20

COMMUNICATION:  When she wants to talk about a problem...
You listen, displaying a concerned expression… 0
You listen, for over 30 minutes… +5
You relate to her problem and share a similar experience… +50
Your mind wanders to sports and you suddenly hear her saying “Well, what do you think I should do?”… -100
You have fallen asleep… -200

IT’S THAT TIME OF THE MONTH
You talk… -100
You don’t talk… -150
You spend time with her… -200
You don’t spend time with her… -500
You seem to be enjoying yourself… -1000
You send her to joe-ks.com… +777


QuotaBills
Ability is a poor man's wealth. - John Wooden

Golden dreams make men awake hungry. - Proverb

Where a man feels pain he lays his hand. - Dutch Proverb

A man is known by the company he avoids. - Unknown

The more a man knows, the more he forgives. - Catherine the Great

Until Eve arrived, this was a man's world. - Richard Armour

Man is the only animal that blushes. Or needs to. - Mark Twain

No free man shall ever be debarred the use of arms. - Thomas Jefferson

I like men who have a future and women who have a past. - Oscar Wilde

Men will let you abuse them only if you make them laugh. - Henry Ward Beecher

You can see real attitude of man when he's terrified. - Toba Beta

If a man has common sense, he has all the sense there is. - Sam Rayburn

Talk to a man about himself, and he will listen for hours. - Benjamin Disraeli

A man is not old until his regrets take the place of dreams. - Yiddish proverb

If a man who cannot count finds a four-leaf clover, is he lucky? - Stanislaw J. Lec

Always be ready to speak your mind, and a base man will avoid you. - William Blake

The real problem is not whether machines think but whether men do. - B.F. Skinner

Life is not having been told that the man has just waxed the floor. - Ogden Nash

Misogynist: A man who hates women as much as women hate one another. - H L Mencken

Women are wiser than men because they know less and understand more. - James Stephens

The trouble with being best man is you don't get a chance to prove it. - Les A Murray

The best use of laws is to teach men to trample bad laws under their feet. - Wendell Phillips

There is nothing more beautiful in this world than a healthy, wise old man. - Lin Yutang

The concept of number is the obvious distinction between the beast and man. - Joseph de Maistre

Any fool can paint a picture, but it takes a wise man to be able to sell it. - Samuel Butler

There's man all over for you, blaming on his boots the fault of his feet. - Samuel Beckett

No man is truly married until he understands every word his wife is NOT saying. - Unknown

Men do not quit playing because they grow old; they grow old because they quit playing. - Oliver W. Holmes

Every moment and every event of every man's life on earth plants something in his soul. - Thomas Merton

I believe in the institution of marriage, and I intend to keep trying until I get it right. - Richard Pryor

A man does not attain the status of Galileo merely because he is persecuted; he must also be right. - Stephen Jay Gould

What can be added to the happiness of man who is in health, out of debt, and has a clear conscience? - Adam Smith

There's no reason to be the richest man in the cemetery. You can't do any business from there. - Colonel Harland Sanders

Any man who can drive safely while kissing a pretty girl is simply not giving the kiss the attention it deserves. - Albert Einstein

Every man is afraid of something. That's how you know he's in love with you; when he is afraid of losing you. - Unknown

Men occasionally stumble over the truth, but most of them pick themselves up and hurry off as if nothing ever happened. - Winston Churchill

The greatest mistake we humans make in our relationships: we listen half, understand quarter, think zero, and react double. - Unknown

Part of the reason that men seem so much less loving than women is that men's behavior is measured with a feminine ruler. - Francesca M. Cancian

One of the greatest discoveries a man makes, one of his great surprises, is to find he can do what he was afraid he couldn't do. - Henry Ford

Painting is a blind man's profession. He paints not what he sees, but what he feels, what he tells himself about what he has seen. - Pablo Picasso


see also   Marriage  &  Relationship   Sections
A Woman’s Mind
Before Online Dating
Before The Impact
Everything Men Know About Women
“Female Speak” Translation
Flower Shop For Men
Hormone Guide
Mission Gap - for Men & Women
iGifts
Looking For Your Wife?
Names of the Colours
Romance Lost
Secret Of A Long Marriage
Sheer Surprise
Understanding Women
When Men Shop For Groceries
Winning An Argument With A Woman

 

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17-Jun-2019