Texas Divorce

It’s OK to give away the mobile home, but NOT the pickup!


Dear Billy Bob,
As you know, my divorce was final yesterday, and in the divorce settlement, she was awarded the double-wide mobile home and my pickup truck.

Can you believe it? I expected her to get the double-wide, but having to give her my truck was just more than I could bear.

I had no choice, so as per the court order, I delivered the truck to her before 2:00 PM today.

I’m sure gonna miss that truck. I had to get a picture of it before it was gone forever.

If you need to get hold of me, I’ll be staying with my folks until I can find me a place.

Take care,
Bubba

Pickup truck smashed through side of building - Texas Divorce

QuotaBills
The law is silent during war. - Cicero

A bad compromise beats a good lawsuit. - Saying

Don't judge your taco by its price. - Hunter S. Thompson

Law cannot persuade where it cannot punish. - Thomas Fuller

Law and order are not necessarily partners. - Saying

Our ancestors ... were laborers, not lawyers. - Thomas Jefferson

A government of law is a government of lawyers. - Saying

The first thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers. - William Shakespeare

A fox should not be on the jury at a goose's trial. - Thomas Fuller

Lawyers spend a great deal of their time shoveling smoke. - Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.

You're breakin' about 18 laws, maybe even a dozen. - Archie Bunker

Ambition is like hunger; it obeys no law but its appetite. - H.W. Shaw

It is only shallow people who do not judge by appearances. - Oscar Wilde

In the Halls of Justice, the only justice is in the halls. - Lenny Bruce

If there were no bad people there would be no good lawyers. - Charles Dickens

You shall judge a man by his foes as well as by his friends. - Joseph Conrad

Behind every successful man stands a surprised mother-in-law. - Hubert Humphrey

A lawyer's opinion is worth nothing unless it is paid for. - Unknown

It should be possible to explain the laws of physics to a barmaid. - Albert Einstein

When you judge another, you do not define them, you define yourself. - Wayne W. Dyer

Laws control the lesser man... Right conduct controls the greater one. - Mark Twain

The laws of probability - so true in general, so fallacious in particular. - Edward Gibbon

Law school is the opposite of sex. Even when it's good it's lousy. - Unknown

The best use of laws is to teach men to trample bad laws under their feet. - Wendell Phillips

The only thing a lawyer won't question is the legitimacy of his mother. - WC Fields

It took me a long time not to judge myself through someone else's eyes. - Sally Field

Ignorance, allied with power, is the most ferocious enemy justice can have. - James Baldwin

The successful revolutionary is a statesman, the unsuccessful one a criminal. - Erich Fromm

Even when laws have been written down, they ought not always to remain unaltered. - Aristotle

To make laws that man cannot, and will not obey, serves to bring all law into contempt. - Elizabeth C Stanton

Justice is the insurance we have on our lives, and obedience is the premium we pay for it. - William Penn

My husband and I had our best sex during our divorce. It was like cheating on our lawyers. - Priscilla Lopez

Law: an ordinance of reason for the common good, made by him who has care of the community. - Thomas Aquinas

Disease is war with the laws of our being, and all war, as a great general has said, is hell. - Lewis G. Janes

Do not judge me by my successes, judge me by how many times I fell down and got back up again. - Nelson Mandela

Whatever their other contributions to our society, lawyers could be an important source of protein. - Guindon

In Hollywood, an equitable divorce settlement means each party getting fifty per cent of publicity. - Lauren Bacall

In a litigation-happy society, clear agreements often prevent small disagreements form becoming big ones. - Harvey Mackay

If the misery of the poor be caused not by the laws of nature, but by our institutions, great is our sin. - Charles Darwin

Shakespeare said pretty well everything and what he left out, James Joyce, with a judge from meself, put in. - Brendan Behan

There's a lot of fake people in the world, but before you judge them, make sure you're not one of them. - Unknown

Whenever men take the law into their own hands, the loser is the law. And when the law loses, freedom languishes. - Robert Kennedy

There are not enough jails, not enough policemen, not enough courts to enforce a law not supported by the people. - Hubert H Humphrey

The courtrooms of America all too often have Piper Cub advocates trying to handle the controls of Boeing 747 litigation. - Warren E. Burger

My other brother-in-law died. He was a karate expert, then joined the army. The first time he saluted, he killed himself. - Henny Youngman

Laws are like spiders' webs which, if anything small falls into them they ensnare it, but large things break through and escape. - Solon

As far as the laws of mathematics refer to reality, they are not certain; and as far as they are certain, they do not refer to reality. - Albert Einstein

Morality cannot be legislated, but behavior can be regulated. Judicial decrees may not change the heart, but they can restrain the heartless. - Martin Luther King Jr.

The Law, in its majestic equality, forbids the rich, as well as the poor, to sleep under the bridges, to beg in the streets, and to steal bread. - Anatole France

There is only one categorical imperative: Act only according to that maxim by which you can at the same time will that it should become universal law. - Immanuel Kant


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20-Feb-2019