My Father Is Gay (PG)

Little Johnny’s playoff hopes dashed

Little Johnny was in his 5th grade class when the teacher asked the children what their fathers did for a living. All the typical answers came up - fireman, policeman, salesman, etc.

Little Johnny was being uncharacteristically quiet and so the teacher asked him about his father.

“My father’s an exotic dancer in a gay bar and takes off all his clothes in front of other men. Sometimes, if the offer is really good, he’ll go out to the alley with some guy and make love with him for money.”

The teacher, obviously shaken by this statement, hurriedly set the other children to work on some colouring, and took Little Johnny aside to ask him, “Is that really true about your father?”

“No,” said Little Johnny. “He plays for the Vancouver Canucks but I was too embarrassed to say that in front of the other kids.”


QuotaBills
Hockey is a tough game. - Bobby Orr

Hire character. Train skill. - Peter Schutz

Hockey's my favorite sport. - Denis Leary

Every day is a great day for hockey. - Mario Lemieux

To succeed in hockey, you need teamwork. - Henry Samueli

Happiness is not the end of life; character is. - Henry Ward Beecher

Treasure your relationships, not your possessions. - Anthony J. D'Angelo

Appropriate rules cultivate a disciplined character. - Bill Welker

A bachelor is a guy who never made the same mistake once. - Phyllis Diller

If you don't have enemies, you don't have character. - Paul Newman

There is no greater index of character so sure as the voice. - Benjamin Disraeli

Hockey seems completely lawless and, therefore, inexplicably sexy. - Rachel Nichols

It is of little traits that the greatest human character is composed. - William Winter

Character may almost be called the most effective means of persuasion. - Aristotle

Fame is only good for one thing - they will cash your check in a small town. - Truman Capote

My goal was to play in the NHL, because that is the best hockey in the world. - Jaromir Jagr

You can't play hockey with a bald spot, so I'm hanging up the skates. - Joe Sakic

Character and personal force are the only investments that are worth anything. - Walt Whitman

When you think of hockey, when you think of Canada, you think of Wayne Gretzky. - Joe Sakic

Peppering your relationship with a dash of mystery can make it far more palatable. - Khang K. Nguyen

You can only go as high on the leadership ladder as your character will allow you. - John C Maxwell

You cannot dream yourself into a character; you must hammer and forge yourself one. - Henry David Thoreau

Actions, looks, words and steps form the alphabet by which you may spell character. - Johann Kasper Lavater

A man never discloses his own character so clearly as when he describes another's. - Jean Paul Richter

There is nothing in which people more betray their character than in what they laugh at. - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Strength of character may be learned at work, but beauty of character is learned at home. - Henry Drummond

I never looked at hockey as work. Now that I'd finished playing, I had to go to work. - Bobby Orr

Any disaster you can survive is an improvement in your character, your stature, and your life. - Joseph Campbell

Great acting is being able to create a character. Great character is being able to be yourself. - John Leguizamo

Talent is God-given. Be humble. Fame is man-given. Be thankful. Conceit is self-given. Be careful. - Harvey Mackay

I think the thing you always got to keep in mind, you know, hockey is a game of one-on-one battles. - Mark Messier

Romance is thinking about your significant other, when you are supposed to be thinking about something else. - Nicholas Sparks

When writing a novel a writer should create living people; people not characters. A character is a caricature. - Ernest Hemingway

By my count, more business leaders have failed and derailed because of arrogance than any other character flaw. - Harvey Mackay

Every human being is intended to have a character of his own; to be what no others are, and to do what no other can do. - William Henry Channing

Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain but it takes character and self control to be understanding and forgiving. - Dale Carnegie

From a shy, timid girl I had become a woman of resolute character, who could no longer be frightened by the struggle with troubles. - Anna Dostoevsky

Faithfulness is essential to the character of a friend: without this there can be no safety in intimacy with and confidence in him. - Samuel Hopkins

Parents can only give good advice or put them on the right path, the final forming of a person's character lies in their own hands. - Anne Frank

Baseball happens to be a game of cumulative tension but football, basketball and hockey are played with hand grenades and machine guns. - John Leonard


see also   Hockey,  Little Johnny  &  Relationship  Sections

 

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17-Oct-2017