Perfectly Groomed Love Rug

Driving and shaving don’t mix - unless you’re a Redneck




QuotaBills
Never insult anyone by accident. - Robert A. Heinlein

A child is a curly dimpled lunatic. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Safety doesn't happen by accident. - Unknown

Name the greatest of all inventors. Accident. - Mark Twain

Stardom isn't a profession, it's an accident. - Lauren Bacall

The police must obey the law while enforcing the law. - Earl Warren

Stress should be a powerful driving force, not an obstacle. - Bob Phillips

Two-lane blacktop isn't a highway - it's an attitude. - Unknown

Giving never happens by accident. It's always intentional. - Amy Grant

Desperation is a fellow shaving before stepping on the scales. - Unknown

I had to stop driving my car for a while - the tires got dizzy. - Steven Wright

Have fun, be active. Ride a bike instead of driving, for example. - Dan Buettner

I don't own a camera, so I travel with a police sketch artist. - George Carlin

Living with a conscience is like driving a car with the brakes on. - Budd Schulberg

I really mustache you a question... but I'll shave it for later. - Unknown

My driving abilities from Mexico have helped me get through Hollywood. - Salma Hayek

I aimed at the public's heart and by accident I hit it in the stomach. - Upton Sinclair

If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent? - George Carlin

Sometimes when you look in his eyes you get the feeling that someone else is driving. - David Letterman

You've got to concentrate on one idea. You can't ride a horse with two asses. - Joe Segal

Concentrate on what you're doing - then you won't have time to tense up and worry. - Unknown

To be born free is an accident; to live free a responsibility; to die free is an obligation. - Mrs. Hubbard Davis

There's only two people in your life you should lie to... the police and your girlfriend. - Jack Nicholson

You may be right
I may be crazy.
But it just may be a lunatic you're looking for. - Billy Joel

I have to tell them that last night was a shameful train wreck filled with blind cuddly puppies. - Charlie Sheen

Most of American life is driving somewhere and then driving back wondering why the hell you went. - John Updike

I don't understand American football at all. It looks like all-in wrestling with crash helmets. - Sting

But the thought of being a lunatic did not greatly trouble him; the horror was that he might also be wrong. - George Orwell

Women are like the police. They could have all the evidence in the world, but they still want the confession. - Chris Rock

Concentrate all your thoughts upon the work in hand. The Sun's rays do not burn until brought to a focus. - Alexander Graham Bell

Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac? - George Carlin

It's a sad day when you find out that it's not accident or fortune but just yourself that kept things from you. - Lillian Hellman

My house is on the median strip of a highway. You don't really notice, except I have to leave the driveway doing 60 MPH. - Steven Wright

I am certain that a Sewing Machine would relieve as much human suffering as a hundred Lunatic Asylums, and possibly a good deal more. - Margaret Atwood

If Beethoven had been killed in a plane crash at the age of twenty-two, it would have changed the history of music... and of aviation. - Tom Stoppard

Mathematics is not a careful march down a well-cleared highway, but a journey into a strange wilderness where the explorers often get lost. - W.S. Anglin

Eating a tuna roll at a sushi restaurant should be considered no more environmentally benign than driving a Hummer or harpooning a manatee. - Daniel Pauly

If the "black box" flight recorder is never damaged during a plane crash, why isn't the whole airplane made out of that stuff? - George Carlin

Be thankful for what you have; you’ll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don’t have, you will never, ever have enough. - Oprah Winfrey

Success is no accident. It is hard work, perseverance, learning, studying, sacrifice and most of all, love of what you are doing or learning to do. - Pele


see also   Dubm,  Police   &  Redneck  Section
Alberta Hood Ornament
Car Whitewash
Close Call Parking
Drink And Drive Directions
Driving in Bolivia
Driving While Fatigued
Gold Ferrari
I Love Dad
Infringement Notice - New Zealand Cracker
Irish Dock Overboard Oh-Nos
Love Lost
Motorcycle Enforcement in Japan
New Speed Trap
Not-So-Smart Car
Portable Shower
Redneck Bull-Only Carrier
Reserved for Drunk Drivers
Sans Seatbelt
Scratch-Off Parking Tickets
Shimmy Car-nage
The Perfect Husband
Tie Wrap Bumper
Traffic Jam Intersection
When Not To Stop Too Fast
Where Nobody Speeds

 

Dunking Straw

Vatican Chess

Boot Camp

Hold On, Let Me Catch The Ball

Big Hands Baby

Fire Truck Sinkhole

Cyclist Mailbox

Tearable Puns

Penmanship

Tree Removal

I Sea Drums

Statue of Libertea

Breakfast, Lunch, and Dinner Burrito

Cow Photobomb

Commas Save Lives

Never Give Up

Girl Sitting or Boy Hugging?

The Domino's Effect

Outdoor Pool

Wedding Pound Cake
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23-Aug-2019