#1 humor site on the 'net

Snow Safe

Safety underneath in the storm

Snow Safe thanks to Barry McCartney

QuotaBills
Pork is my friend. - Tom Douglas

There is flattery in friendship. - William Shakespeare

Friends are the sunshine of life. - John Hay

Act like a horse. Be dumb. Just run. - Unknown

Hold a true friend with both your hands. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

The only way to have a friend is to be one. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

One does not make friends. One recognizes them. - Garth Henrichs

Love is not love without a violin playing goat. - Julia Roberts

Strangers are friends that you have yet to meet. - Roberta Lieberman

The speed of a runaway horse counts for nothing. - Jean Cocteau

On second thought, I think I am more crazy than my goat. - Remedios Varo

Animals are my friends... and I don't eat my friends. - George Bernard Shaw

God gave us our relatives; thank God we can choose our friends. - Ethel Mumford

No one is completely unhappy at the failure of his best friend. - Groucho Marx

He will never have true friends who is afraid of making enemies. - William Hazlitt

Champagne for my real friends and real pain for my sham friends. - Tom Waits

A man must eat a peck of salt with his friend before he knows him. - Miguel De Cervantes

Go often to the house of a friend, for weeds choke the unused path. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

She walked across the ballroom as if she were trudging through deep snow. - Noel Coward

I met so many people. I don't even know some of my friends' names. - Paris Hilton

A friend is a person with whom I may be sincere. Before him, I may think aloud. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

We make our friends. We make our enemies. But God makes our next-door neighbour. - G K Chesterton

Friends are those rare people who ask how we are and then wait to hear the answer. - Ed Cunningham

Only choose in marriage a woman whom you would choose as a friend if she were a man. - Joseph Joubert

The one thing I do not want to be called is First Lady. It sounds like a saddle horse. - Jacqueline Kennedy

A true friend is the one that's coming in the door while everyone else is going out. - Dr. Phil McGraw

Before you contradict an old man, my fair friend, you should endeavor to understand him. - George Santayana

When my friends and I played cowboys and Indians, I was always the Chinese railroad worker. - Robin Williams

One of the worst things that can happen in life is to win a bet on a horse at an early age. - Danny McGoorty

Yes, know thyself: in great concerns or small,
Be this thy care, for this, my friend, is all. - Juvenal

No guest is so welcome in a friend's house that he will not become a nuisance after three days. - Plautus

Advice is like snow, the softer it falls the longer it dwells upon, and the deeper it sinks into the mind. - Samuel Taylor Coleridge

Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings. - Unknown

I value the friend who for me finds time on his calendar, but I cherish the friend who for me does not consult his calendar. - Robert Brault

New York is my Lourdes where I go for spiritual refreshment...a place where you are least likely to be bitten by a wild goat. - Brendan Behan

The space in a needle's eye is sufficient for two friends, but the whole world is scarcely big enough to hold two enemies. - Solomon Ibn Gabirol

Though my friends envied me because I always seemed so cheerful and confident, I was secretly terrified of practically everything. - Erica Jong

The proper office of a friend is to side with you when you are in the wrong. Nearly anybody will side with you when you are right. - Mark Twain

If a friend is in trouble, don't annoy him by asking if there is anything you can do. Think up something appropriate and do it. - Edgar Watson Howe

Science will never be able to reduce the value of a sunset to arithmetic. Nor can it reduce friendship or statesmanship to a formula. - Louis Orr


Annual Meeting of Women Drivers

Bach Flip

Alien Smuggling

The Three Stooges In And Out Of Character

Teamwork

Sorry

Dunking Straw

Vatican Chess

Boot Camp

Hold On, Let Me Catch The Ball

Big Hands Baby

Fire Truck Sinkhole

Cyclist Mailbox

Tearable Puns

Penmanship

Tree Removal

I Sea Drums

Statue of Libertea

Breakfast, Lunch, and Dinner Burrito

Cow Photobomb

Commas Save Lives

Never Give Up

Girl Sitting or Boy Hugging?

The Domino's Effect