#1 humor site on the 'net

Size Matters

No one wants a small glass of wine

Size Matters thanks to Barry McCartney

QuotaBills
In wine, there is the truth. - Pliny the Elder

I like a wine that fights back. - John Steed

Wine is my favorite 4 letter word. - Unknown

When the wine is in, the wit is out. - English Proverb

That one kind of grapes on my nerves. - Archie Bunker

Does wine count as a serving of fruit? - Joe-kster

Religions change; beer and wine remain. - Hervey Allen

When wine goes in strange things come out. - Friedrich Schiller

Life is too short to drink the house wine. - Helen Thomas

Every cask smells of the wine it contains. - Spanish Proverb

We only serve fine wine. Did you bring any? - Unknown

The tartness of his face sours ripe grapes. - William Shakespeare

Wine improves with age. I improve with wine. - Unknown

Good friends, like wine, get better with age. - Unknown

Talking to you is like casting pearls into wine. - Archie Bunker

Everything's better with bacon and red wine. - Dianne Harman

It was 2:00 p.m., too early for wine but not for chocolate. - Andrea Hurst

The sweetest grapes are picked from the vineyard of friendship. - French Proverb

I'm aging like fine wine. I'm getting complex and fruity. - Unknown

Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy. - Benjamin Franklin

We are all mortal until the first kiss and the second glass of wine. - Eduardo Galeano

It's hard to find a negligee in my size. I wear a Junior Mister. - Phyllis Diller

Men are like wine. Some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age. - Pope John XXIII

In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. - Ben Franklin

One of the disadvantages of wine is that it makes a man mistake words for thoughts. - Samuel Johnson

It's not the size of the man in the fight, but the size of the fight in the man. - Unknown

It's not the size of the dog in the fight - it's the size of the fight in the dog. - Mark Twain

My heart says chocolate and wine but my jeans say, for the love of God women, eat a salad. - Unknown

Measure thy life by loss instead of gain, not by the wine drunk, but the wine poured forth. - Harriet King

Size isn't everything. The whale is endangered, while the ant continues to do just fine. - Bill Vaughan

Great people talk about ideas, average people talk about things, and small people talk about wine. - Fran Lebowitz

I'm making wine at home, but I'm making it out of raisins so it will be aged automatically. - Steven Wright

Our ideas, like orange-plants, spread out in proportion to the size of the box which imprisons the roots. - Edward Bulwer Lytton

The Bible's full of wine. God ain't got nothing against a little drink to celebrate His Son's birthday with. - Archie Bunker

If you want to make a permanent change, stop focusing on the size of your problems and start focusing on the size of you. - T. Harv Eker

The disparity between a restaurant's price and food quality rises in direct proportion to the size of the pepper mill. - Bryan Miller

Confidence is beautiful, no matter your size, no matter your weight. Be confident in who you are and you'll be beautiful. - Unknown

A fruit is a vegetable with looks and money. Plus, if you let fruit rot, it turns into wine; something Brussels Sprouts never do. - P.J. O'Rourke

I've never believed in measuring one's worth by the size of his or her bank account. I prefer to look at distance traveled. - Dan Rather

Morals are not, like bacon, to be cured by hanging; nor, like wine, to be improved by sea voyages; nor, like honey, to be preserved in cells. - William Taylor


Camel Walkers

Head Path

Whiskey Jig

Running Track

Body Bodice - Double OUCH!!!

DogWood

Feel-Good Story of the Year

Octostump

Poodle Power

Anyone Home?

Newfie Cab Driver - Can You Guess His Number?

Men In Kilts

iPhone Sushi

2 At A Time

Redneck House Move

Circle Of Fear

Busy Train

Kia vs Nokia

Redneck Potter's Wheel

Child Disarma-meant

Grandma Needs Help

Friendly BBQ Reminder

Cell Phone Book

It's Play Time!