#1 humor site on the 'net

Make America Great Britain Again

the Queen passes greetings to the Donald

Make America Great Britain Again thanks to Wayne Nowazek

QuotaBills
Every man is a king at home. - English Proverb

Scotland is the Canada of England. - Rainn Wilson

There is no royal road to geometry. - Euclid

England is a nation of shopkeepers. - Napoleon Bonaparte

When you strike at a king, you must kill him. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Never live like a king, and die like a pauper. - Joe Segal

In the kingdom of the blind, the one-eyed man is king. - Erasmus

Hunger is felt by a slave and hunger is felt by a king. - Ashanti Proverb

The best thing I know between France and England is the sea. - Douglas Jerrold

Irene Lorenzo, queen of the Women's Lubrication Movement. - Archie Bunker

What Great Britain calls the Far East is to us the near north. - Robert Gordon Menzies

I would rather be a beggar and single than a queen and married. - Queen Elizabeth I

Don King is a big ... thief, and everyone in this room knows it. - Donald Trump

There'll always be an England, even if it's in Hollywood. - Bob Hope

At the end of the game, the King and the pawn go into the same box. - Italian Proverb

Elvis may have been the king of rock 'n roll, but I am the queen. - Little Richard

The institution of royalty in any form is an insult to the human race. - Mark Twain

England is an empire, Germany is a nation, a race, France is a person. - Jules Michelet

Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince, and dinner like a pauper. - Adelle Davis

A goose flies by a chart the Royal Geographical Society could not improve. - Oliver Wendell Holmes

It's a good thing I was born a girl, otherwise I'd be a drag queen. - Dolly Parton

Martin Luther King took us to the mountaintop; I want to take us to the bank. - Don King

Exercise is king, nutrition is queen. Put them together and you have a kingdom. - Jack LaLanne

My way of joe-king is telling the truth; that is the funniest joke in the world. - George Bernard Shaw

My favourite characters in the Bible are King David, Delilah and Charlton Heston. - Milton Berle

On the Continent people have good food; in England people have good table manners. - George Mikes

The royal road to a man's heart is to talk to him about the things he treasures most. - Dale Carnegie

Physiology is the stepchild of medicine. That is why Cinderella often turns out the queen. - Martin H. Fischer

I have the body but of a weak and feeble woman, but I have the heart and stomach of a King. - Elizabeth I

Ireland is a small but insuppressible island half an hour nearer the sunset than Great Britain. - Thomas Kettle

The Kingdom of France will be thus ruled by King Charles VII... He will enter Paris in good company. - Joan of Arc

The first who was king was a fortunate soldier: Who serves his country well has no need of ancestors. - Voltaire

I'm a games and theory king of guy. I love puzzles, so it was fun dissecting Shakespeare's prose. - Neil Patrick Harris

There is no king who has not had a slave among his ancestors, and no slave who has not had a king among his. - Helen Keller

I have a catch phrase: "You're fired," ... Don King has a catch phrase: "Not Guilty." - Donald Trump

The New England Journal of Medicine reports that 9 out of 10 doctors agree that 1 out of 10 doctors is an idiot. - Jay Leno

The diamond may adorn royalty, regardless of personal worth; but jewels of thought render even poverty illustrious and sublime. - Gems for the Fireside

In England people actually try to be brilliant at breakfast. That is so dreadful of them! Only dull people are brilliant at breakfast. - Oscar Wilde

In this year, King Aethelstan, Lord of Warriors, ring-giver to men... won eternal glory, in battle with sword edges, around Brunaburh. - Unknown

Lincolnshire is the Idaho of England. You were either going to drive a tractor for the rest of your life or head for the city to work in a factory. - Bernie Taupin


Wet T-Shirt Contest Winners

Cheating Husband

Stuck On High Gear

Bottom Blast Car Wash

Yo Mama Bin Shopping

Gangsta

Helmet Full Of Hair

Air Conditioner Repair

Redneck Towing

Walking His Fresh Food Pet

Japanese Tea Bath

Redneck Daycare

Hedge Hunter

Pilot Prop Job

Front To Side View

Moses' USB Tablets

Family Photo

Is Laughter The Best Medicine?

Plastered Wall Plasterer

Waffle Board

Stairway Repair

Cowboy Bubble Bath

Trunk Load

Centennial Puff