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In Stitches

Does your Doctor have a good sense of humour?

In Stitches thanks to Wayne Nowazek

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I told you I was sick. - B.P. Roberts

Physician, heal thyself. - Luke 4:23

Gags die, humor doesn't. - Jack Benny

Medicine is the best medicine. - Doctors Anonymous

One doctor makes work for another. - English Proverb

A young doctor means a new graveyard. - German Proverb

God heals, and the doctor takes the fees. - Benjamin Franklin

The best doctor gives the least medicines. - Benjamin Franklin

I think God has a tremendous sense of humor. - Rainn Wilson

Space ails us moderns: we are sick with space. - Robert Frost

A sense of humor is just common sense, dancing. - Clive James

Sickness comes on horseback but departs on foot. - Dutch Proverb

I want my food dead. Not sick, not dying - dead. - Oscar Wilde

Humor is the instinct for taking pain playfully. - Max Eastman

A little chocolate a day keeps the doctor at bay. - Marcia Carrington

One doesn't have a sense of humor. It has you. - Larry Gelbart

When I first found out I had diabetes I denied it. - Nell Carter

One should only see a psychiatrist out of boredom. - Muriel Spark

Humor is the affectionate communication of insight. - Leo Rosten

I always say shopping is cheaper than a psychiatrist. - Tammy Faye Bakker

The doctor is often more to be feared than the disease. - French Proverb

No man is a good doctor who has never been sick himself. - Chinese Proverb

If you wish to die young, make your physician your heir. - Romania Proverb

I'm never sick. Why get sick? It's a waste of time. - Martha Stewart

A sense of humour is the ability to laugh at one's self. - Charlie Chaplin

A doctor whose breath smells has no right to medical opinion. - Martin H. Fischer

Trips to the dentist - I like to postpone that kind of thing. - Johnny Depp

Humor is the first of the gifts to perish in a foreign tongue. - Virginia Woolf

In a sick-room or a bed-room there should never be shutters shut. - Florence Nightingale

The more I live, the more I think that humor is the saving sense. - Jacob Riis

Be kind to your dentist because he has "fillings" too. - Unknown

My doctor gave me two weeks to live. I hope they're in August. - Ronnie Shakes

There is no curing a sick man who believes himself to be in health. - Henri Amiel

The next best thing to solving a problem is finding some humor in it. - Frank A. Clark

The worst thing about medicine is that one kind makes another necessary. - Elbert Hubbard

There's no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face. - Bernard Williams

Doctors think a lot of patients are cured who have simply quit in disgust. - Don Herold

Humor does not diminish the pain - it makes the space around it get bigger. - Allen Klein

Financial ruin from medical bills is almost exclusively an American disease. - Roul Turley

I told my dentist my teeth are going yellow. he told me to wear a brown tie. - Rodney Dangerfield

To array a man's will against his sickness is the supreme art of medicine. - Henry Ward Beecher

A hospital should also have a recovery room adjoining the cashier's office. - Francis O'Walsh

If you are too smart to pay the doctor, you had better be too smart to get ill. - African Proverb

He's the best physician that knows the worthlessness of the most medicines. - Benjamin Franklin

Humour is a rubber sword - it allows you to make a point without drawing blood. - Mary Hirsch

The best doctors in the world are Doctor Diet, Doctor Quiet, and Doctor Merryman. - Jonathan Swift

Humor distorts nothing, and only false gods are laughed off their earthly pedestals. - Agnes Repplier

The only medicine for suffering, crime, and all the other woes of mankind, is wisdom. - Thomas Huxley

What clinical lectures I will give in heaven, demonstrating the ignorance of doctors! - Israel Zangwill

It is the ability to take a joke, not make one, that proves you have a sense of humor. - Max Eastman

If suffering brought wisdom, the dentist's office would be full of luminous ideas. - Mason Cooley

The latest thing in psychiatry is group therapy. Instead of couches, they use bunk beds. - Henny Youngman

I think superheroes are heroes with flaws, and in their flaws, there is a sense of humor. - Peter Segal

I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course. - Groucho Marx

There is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and hurt. - Erma Bombeck

Coaching doesn't make sick people well - it helps healthy people become extra-ordinary. - Thomas Leonard

Humor is an affirmation of dignity, a declaration of our superiority to all that befalls us. - Romain Gary

The practice of medicine occurs even in primitive society, but law accompanies civilization. - Saying

I wonder why you can always read a Doctor's bill but you can never read his prescription. - Finley Peter Dunne

Analyzing humor is like dissecting a frog. Few people are interested and the frog dies of it. - E.B. White

Constant attention by a good nurse may be just as important as a major operation by a surgeon. - Dag Hammarskjold

Some people say my humor focuses too much on stereotypes. It doesn't. It focuses on facts. - Sarah Silverman

My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four. Unless there are three other people. - Orson Welles

A psychiatrist is a fellow who asks you a lot of expensive questions your wife asks for nothing. - Joey Adams

You may not be able to change a situation, but with humor you can change your attitude about it. - Allen Klein

The art of medicine consists of amusing the patient, whilst Mother Nature takes care of the cure. - Voltaire

My physician has become warden of my medically imprisoned body, pharmaceuticals the bars on my cell. - Grey E. Livingston

Diabetes is a great example whereby, giving the patient the tools, you can manage yourself very well. - Clayton Christensen

The only equipment lack in the modern hospital? Somebody to meet you at the entrance with a handshake! - Martin H. Fischer

Mark my words, when a society has to resort to the lavatory for its humour, the writing is on the wall. - Alan Bennett

Congratulations, you have a sense of humor. And to those who didn't: Go stick your head in the mud. - Jesse Ventura

One in four kids have either pre-diabetes or diabetes - what I like to call diabesity. How did this happen? - Mark Hyman

There seems to be no lengths to which humorless people will not go to analyze humor. It seems to worry them. - Robert Benchley

If my doctor told me I had only six minutes to live, I wouldn't brood, I'd just type a little faster. - Isaac Asimov

You go to a psychiatrist when you're slightly cracked and keep going until you're completely cracked. - Unknown

A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon without springs. It's jolted by every pebble on the road. - Henry Ward Beecher

Humor has been the balm of my life, but it's been reserved for those close to me, not part of the public Lana. - Lana Turner

My illness is due to my doctor's insistence that I drink milk, a whitish fluid they force down helpless babies. - WC Fields

Humour is the weapon of unarmed people: it helps people who are oppressed to smile at the situation that pains them. - Simon Wiesenthal

When humor works, it works because it's clarifying what people already feel. It has to come from someplace real. - Tina Fey

I have never understood why it should be considered derogatory to the Creator to suppose that he has a sense of humor. - Ralph Inge

To the person with a toothache, even if the world is tottering, there is nothing more important than a visit to a dentist. - George Bernard Shaw

Health is the state about which medicine has nothing to say; sanctity is the state about which theology has nothing to say. - W H Auden

Women, as they grow older, rely more and more on cosmetics. Men, as they grow older, rely more and more on a sense of humor. - George Jean Nathan

A doctor who cannot take a good history and a patient who cannot give one are in danger of giving and receiving bad treatment. - Unknown

Trying to manage diabetes is hard because if you don't, there are consequences you'll have to deal with later in life. - Bryan Adams

I've got a great doctor. He gave a guy six months to live. They couldn't pay his bill so he gave him another six months. - Henny Youngman

Let no one suppose that the words doctor and patient can disguise from the parties the fact that they are employer and employee. - George Bernard Shaw

A doctor must work eighteen hours a day and seven days a week. If you cannot console yourself to this, get out of the profession. - Martin H. Fischer

It's a funny relationship that makeup artists have. I always feel kind of like a dentist. People look at me and think of pain. - Rick Baker

Doctors are saying that each piece of bacon you eat takes 9 minutes off of your life. Based on that math, I should have died in 1732. - Unknown

Suspense is very important. Even though this is humor and they're short stories, that theory of building suspense is still there. - Sergio Aragones

Keep your sense of humor. There's enough stress in the rest of your life to let bad shots ruin a game you're supposed to enjoy. - Amy Alcott

Humor is a serious thing. I like to think of it as one of our greatest earliest natural resources, which must be preserved at all cost. - James Thurber

A taste for irony has kept more hearts from breaking than a sense of humor, for it takes irony to appreciate the joke which is on oneself. - Jessamyn West

Smiling is definitely one of the best beauty remedies. If you have a good sense of humor and a good approach to life, that's beautiful. - Rashida Jones

I do not have a psychiatrist and I do not want one, for the simple reason that if he listened to me long enough, he might become disturbed. - James Thurber

When I was born the doctor came out to the waiting room and told my father, "We did everything we could... but he pulled through." - Rodney Dangerfield

I do not love to work out, but if I stick to exercising every day and put the right things in my mouth, then my diabetes just stays in check. - Halle Berry

When you are called to a sick man, be sure you know what the matter is — if you do not know, nature can do a great deal better than you can guess. - Nicholas de Belleville


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