#1 humor site on the 'net

Volkswagen Traffic Jam

Where VW's rust in peace

Volkswagen Traffic Jam thanks to Wayne Nowazek

QuotaBills
Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman - Christopher Walken

Laughter is the best medicine. - the Joe-kster

No doctor is better than three. - German Proverb

Caring is the essence of nursing. - Jean Watson

Constant dripping hollows out a stone. - Lucretius

I'm so mean, I make medicine sick. - Muhammad Ali

One good egg in a barrel of rotten apples. - Archie Bunker

Nurses are the hospitality of the hospital. - Carrie Latet

Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. - Erma Bombeck

You can't make an omelet without breaking eggs. - French Proverb

A half doctor near is better than a whole one far away. - German Proverb

The doctor is often more to be feared than the disease. - French Proverb

Eggheads unite, you have nothing to lose but your yolks. - Adlai Stevenson

Ireland is a fruitful mother of genius, but a barren nurse. - Unknown

I'm Jewish, so I don't know much about Easter eggs. - Simon Kinberg

Medicine sometimes snatches away health, sometimes gives it. - Ovid

A smart mother makes often a better diagnosis than a poor doctor. - August Bier

Joy is more divine than sorrow, for joy is bread and sorrow is medicine. - Henry Ward Beecher

My idea of baking is buying a ready-make cake mix and throwing in an egg. - Cilla Black

Faith and knowledge lean largely upon each other in the practice of medicine. - Peter Mere Latham

A hospital should also have a recovery room adjoining the cashier's office. - Francis O'Walsh

If you are too smart to pay the doctor, you had better be too smart to get ill. - African Proverb

The art of medicine consists in amusing the patient while nature cures the disease. - Voltaire

Poisons and medicine are oftentimes the same substance given with different intents. - Peter Mere Latham

No, Doctor, I don't want to grow young again. I just want to keep on growing old. - Madame de Rothschild

People pay the doctor for his trouble; for his kindness they still remain in his debt. - Seneca

The practice of medicine is a thinker's job, the practice of surgery a plumber's. - Martin H. Fischer

I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course. - Groucho Marx

Physiology is the stepchild of medicine. That is why Cinderella often turns out the queen. - Martin H. Fischer

Constant attention by a good nurse may be just as important as a major operation by a surgeon. - Dag Hammarskjold

My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four. Unless there are three other people. - Orson Welles

The chicken probably came before the egg because it is hard to imagine God wanting to sit on an egg. - Unknown

If my doctor told me I had only six minutes to live, I wouldn't brood, I'd just type a little faster. - Isaac Asimov

Recommending gastric bypass as a national solution for our diabetes epidemic is bad medicine and bad economics. - Mark Hyman

The trained nurse has become one of the great blessings of humanity, taking a place beside the physician and the priest. - William Osler

My doctor recently told me that jogging could add years to my life. I think he was right. I feel ten years older already. - Milton Berle

Health is the state about which medicine has nothing to say; sanctity is the state about which theology has nothing to say. - W H Auden

In any world menu, Canada must be considered the vichyssoise of nations - it's cold, half-French, and difficult to stir. - Stuart Keate

Only one rule in medical ethics need concern you: that action on your part which best conserves the interest of your patient. - Martin H. Fischer

Let no one suppose that the words doctor and patient can disguise from the parties the fact that they are employer and employee. - George Bernard Shaw


Stairway Chute

Walkway Not

Pirate Vacation

How Not To Prop Start Your Plane

Redneck Spaghetti

Wild Game Nutrition Guide

Alaska Gas

Definition Of A Good Friend

Redneck Car Repair

Self-Propelled Rocket

Pole Clock

Donut Holes

Insect Food Fight

Living At C Level

Little Johnny Bath

Emergency Stops Only

Portable Balance Beam

Fried Eggs - Military Style

Motorvation

Teenage Mutant Ninja Hay Bail

Driving Rain

Eddie Reward

Got Them All

Owlvis Presley