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Nice Try, China

Heavy Dtuy Wrench

Nice Try, China thanks to Wayne Nowazek

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Literature is news that stays news. - Ezra Pound

A poet can survive everything but a misprint. - Oscar Wilde

The man who laughs has not yet heard the news. - Bertolt Brecht

Clever men are good, but they are not the best. - Thomas Carlyle

China is a big country, inhabited by many Chinese. - Charles de Gaulle

Life is a foreign language; all men mispronounce it. - Christopher Morley

Drawing on my fine command of language, I said nothing. - Robert Benchley

Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see. - Mark Twain

Symptoms are the body's mother tongue; signs are in a foreign language. - John Brown

Music is the only language in which you cannot say a mean or sarcastic thing. - John Erskine

No Chinese Catholics are allowed to worship ancestors in their familial temples. - Pope Clement XI

This is good news... If the Persians hide the sun, we shall do battle in the shade. - Herodotus

I personally think we developed language because of our deep inner need to complain. - Jane Wagner

First the Doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me. - Steve Martin

Yoga has a sly, clever way of short circuiting the mental patterns that cause anxiety. - Baxter Bell

A gorilla with a cellphone riding a bicycle is bound to generate some clever captions. - Steve Breen

To be clever enough to get a great deal of money, one must be stupid enough to want it. - George Bernard Shaw

It is better to be making the news than taking it; to be an actor rather than a critic. - Winston Churchill

Never make fun of someone who speaks broken English. It means they know another language. - H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

Many agree that the worst thing that could ever happen is if Russia and China get closer. - Donald Trump

I just wasn't cut out to be a Chinese Tiger Mom. I'm more of an Irish Setter Dad. - P.J. O'Rourke

It's a strange world of language in which skating on thin ice can get you into hot water. - Franklin P. Jones

I want to have a bunch of kids so I can open a factory and have free labor. Beat that, China! - Jarod Kintz

Like a bull into a china closet. Like in that picture, "The Prince and The Porpoise." - Archie Bunker

German is the most extravagantly ugly language - it sounds like someone using a sick bag on a 747. - Willy Rushton

I had a meal last night. I ordered everything in French - surprised everybody, it was a Chinese restaurant. - Tommy Cooper

Evening news is where they begin with "Good evening", and then proceed to tell you why it isn't. - Unknown

Violence of language leads to violence of action. Angry men seldom fight if their tongues do not lead the fray. - Charles V Roman

Just because I have rice on my clothes doesn't mean I've been to a wedding. A Chinese man threw up on me. - Phyllis Diller

If you talk to a man in a language he understands, that goes to his head. If you talk to him in his language, that goes to his heart. - Nelson Mandela

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks? - George Carlin

"I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence? - George Carlin

She's so fat she's my two best friends. She wears stretch caftans. She's got more chins than the Chinese telephone directory. - Joan Rivers

I do not like to get the news, because there has never been an era when so many things were going so right for so many of the wrong persons. - Ogden Nash

Oil prices have fallen lately. We include this news for the benefit of gas stations, which otherwise wouldn't learn of it for six months. - Bill Tammeus

I deal with foreign countries. I made a lot of money dealing against China. I've made a lot of money dealing against many other countries. - Donald Trump

When written in Chinese, the word "crisis" is composed of two characters. One represents danger, and the other represents opportunity. - John F Kennedy

NBC News just called it "The Great Freeze" - coldest weather in years. Is our country still spending money on the global warming hoax? - Donald Trump

I remain convinced that obstinate addiction to ordinary language in our private thoughts is one of the main obstacles to progress in philosophy. - Bertrand Russell

Mathematicians are like Frenchmen: whatever you say to them they translate into their own language and forthwith it is something entirely different. - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe


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