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Flat Tire Repair

Redneck on a roll

Flat Tire Repair thanks to Wayne Nowazek

QuotaBills
Chop your own path. Get off the car track. - A.Y. Jackson

Power tires only those who do not have it. - Giulio Andreotti

Didn't he take the exercise tax off cars? - Archie Bunker

I xeroxed my watch. Now I have time to spare. - Steven Wright

Four wheels move the body. Two wheels move the soul. - Unknown

Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth. - Erma Bombeck

You can't be emotional in business, it can flat out kill you. - Donald Trump

Living with a conscience is like driving a car with the brakes on. - Budd Schulberg

The best car safety device is a rear-view mirror with a cop in it. - Dudley Moore

A private railroad car is not an acquired taste. One takes to it immediately. - Eleanor R. Belmont

I've exercised with women so thin that buzzards followed them to their cars. - Erma Bombeck

You can buy anything on eBay. I bought the world's oldest globe. It's flat. - Buzz Nutley

You don't have to carry a designer bag that costs more than a car to look cool. - Kesha

The squeaky wheel may get the most oil, but it's also the first to be replaced. - Marilyn Vos Savant

Wealthy people miss one of life's greatest thrills: making the last car payment. - Unknown

A guy knows he’s in love when he loses interest in his car for a couple of days. - Tim Allen

Intelligence is like a 4 wheel drive - it allows you to get stuck in more remote places. - Garrison Keillor

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke

A suburban mother's role is to deliver children obstetrically once, and by car forever after. - Peter DeVries

Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery. - Erma Bombeck

I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving. - Steven Wright

When Henry Ford made cheap, reliable cars people said, 'Nah, what's wrong with a horse?' - Elon Musk

I don't think I'm a celebrity. I'm just a guy from east Texas who loves cars and airplanes. - Carroll Shelby

There are two things in this world that don't last long: dogs chasing cars, and pros putting for pars. - Lee Travino

He who has a thousand friends has not a friend to spare, and he who has one enemy shall meet him everywhere. - Ali ibn-Abi-Talib

Women are like cars: we all want a Ferrari, sometimes want a pick-up truck, and end up with a station wagon. - Tim Allen

The best way to keep children at home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant - and let the air out of the tires. - Dorothy Parker

Service is the rent we pay for being. It is the very purpose of life, and not something you do in your spare time. - Marion Wright Edelman

Life's golden age is when the children are too old to need babysitters and too young to borrow the family car. - Unknown

For all of the fights I have had in my life, both on and off the ice, I have only been in the back of a cop car once. - Tie Domi

I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone. - Steven Wright

I do get scared of the dentist, so a drive-through dentist might make me feel more at home. If I got to stay in my car. - Jessica Pare

Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car. - Garrison Keillor

I'm not a car guy. The subway gets me where I need to go efficiently and cheaply, and I don't worry about traffic. - Joe Scarborough

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my grandfather did, in his sleep. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car. - Unknown

I have an answering machine in my car. It says, "I'm home now. But leave a message and I'll call when I'm out." - Steven Wright

I can change a diaper in 30 seconds flat. I set the new one beneath the old one. That way, it's just wipe and pull the flap over. - Drew Brees

A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car; but if he has a university education, he may steal the whole railroad. - Theodore Roosevelt

The man who makes no mistakes lacks boldness and the spirit of adventure. He never tries anything new. He is a brake on the wheels of progress. - M.W. Larmour

My life is the land, the dogs, the car, the motorcycle, the pond, the canoe, going to pick up mail. It's just a rural retreat that I enjoy. - Burt Shavitz


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