#1 humor site on the 'net

Cow Licks

Lapping it all in on the farm

Cow Licks thanks to Jim Serritella

QuotaBills
France is a dog-hole. - William Shakespeare

Every dog has his day. - Unknown

The dog is the god of frolic. - Henry Ward Beecher

A hard dog to keep on the porch. - Hillary Clinton

Never kick a cow chip on a hot day. - Will Rogers

Sacred cows make the best hamburger. - Mark Twain

A dog has the soul of a philosopher. - Plato

I am I because my little dog knows me. - Gertrude Stein

A dog in desperation will leap over a wall. - Unknown

You can't teach a young dog old tricks. - Warren Buffet

If you want a friend in Washington, get a dog. - Harry S Truman

I spilled spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone. - Steven Wright

My wife's such a bad cook, the dog begs for Alka-Seltzer. - Rodney Dangerfield

A hot dog at the ballpark is better than a steak at the Ritz. - Humphrey Bogart

I've been on so many blind dates, I should get a free dog. - Wendy Liebman

Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called "Ego". - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

Mrs. O'Leary's cow is sorry, but Cleveland burned anyway. - Archie Bunker

Only a biker knows why a dog sticks his head out of a car window. - Unknown

The cow is of the bovine ilk;
One end is moo, the other milk. - Ogden Nash

A dog is a man's best friend. A cat is a cat's best friend. - Robert J Vogel

Traveling through hyperspace ain't like dusting crops, farm boy. - Han Solo

I had rather hear my dog bark at a crow, than a man swear he loves me. - William Shakespeare

You should never hesitate to trade your cow for a handful of magic beans. - Tom Robbins

To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs. - Aldous Huxley

Why can't a woman be more like a dog, huh? So sweet, loving, attentive. - Kirk Douglas

I look like a real bag lady when I go to Starbucks with my dog and get my chai. - Shirley MacLaine

Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful. - Ann Landers

It's not the size of the dog in the fight - it's the size of the fight in the dog. - Mark Twain

Get a good idea and stay with it. Dog it, and work at it until it's done, and done right. - Walt Disney

My wife is a real Puritan. She thinks licking the stamp on the envelope of a Valentine is foreplay. - Milton Berle

If you don't want your dog to have bad breath, do what I do: pour a little Lavoris in the toilet. - Jay Leno

For us in Russia, communism is a dead dog, while, for many people in the West, it is still a living lion. - Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn

It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass! - Rodney Dangerfield

When a dog bites a man, that is not news, because it happens so often. But if a man bites a dog, that is news. - John B. Bogart

Already, companies that speak in the language of the pitch, the dog-and-pony show, are no longer speaking to anyone. - Unknown

We've begun to long for the pitter-patter of little feet, so we bought a dog. It's cheaper and you get more feet. - Rita Rudner

An actor is never so great as when he reminds you of an animal - falling like a cat, lying like a dog, moving like a fox. - Francois Truffaut

I still play hockey every now and then, and I still golf. But my biggest exercise is walking my big dog in the park every day. - Michael J. Fox

For almost seventy years the life insurance industry has been a smug sacred cow feeding the public a steady line of sacred bull. - Ralph Nader

If animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much. - Mark Twain


T-Rex Shadow

Ordnance Table

Wine Bibber

Redneck Wireless Selfie

Tylenol Ban

GoosePrints

Louisiana Potholes

Cheers!

Billy Goat Gruff

Girlfriend Math

Coffee Days

Marathon Runner Tip

Seaweed Burger

Blinker Fluid

Doc In A Box

One At A Time

Life And Beer Are Very Similar

Redneck Speed Bump

Studley Tool Chest

Shopping With Your Husband

PEI Weather

Math Lab Bust

Political Floor

Redneck Winter Tires