#1 humor site on the 'net

Clever Chinese

Sea if you can find them hiding in plane site

Clever Chinese thanks to William Ng

QuotaBills
Too clever is dumb. - Ogden Nash

Literature is news that stays news. - Ezra Pound

A clever man commits no minor blunders. - Goethe

The man who laughs has not yet heard the news. - Bertolt Brecht

Clever men are good, but they are not the best. - Thomas Carlyle

The Republic of China - back in the Olympic Games for the first time. - David Coleman

Marriage, like a submarine, is only safe if you get all the way inside. - Frank Pittman

For most folks, no news is good news; for the press, good news is not news. - Gloria Borger

I liked being a teenager, but I would not go back for all the tea in China. - Rob Lowe

News events are like Texas weather. If you don't like it, wait a minute. - Jessica Savitch

What else is there to live for? Chinese food and women. There is nothing else! - Dudley Moore

No Chinese Catholics are allowed to worship ancestors in their familial temples. - Pope Clement XI

Yoga has a sly, clever way of short circuiting the mental patterns that cause anxiety. - Baxter Bell

A gorilla with a cellphone riding a bicycle is bound to generate some clever captions. - Steve Breen

A clever person turns great troubles into little ones and little ones into none at all. - Chinese proverb

I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying. - Oscar Wilde

To be clever enough to get a great deal of money, one must be stupid enough to want it. - George Bernard Shaw

It is better to be making the news than taking it; to be an actor rather than a critic. - Winston Churchill

Many agree that the worst thing that could ever happen is if Russia and China get closer. - Donald Trump

I want to have a bunch of kids so I can open a factory and have free labor. Beat that, China! - Jarod Kintz

I had a meal last night. I ordered everything in French - surprised everybody, it was a Chinese restaurant. - Tommy Cooper

One of the lessons of history is that nothing is often a good thing to do and always a clever thing to say. - Will Durant

Evening news is where they begin with "Good evening", and then proceed to tell you why it isn't. - Unknown

When a dog bites a man, that is not news, because it happens so often. But if a man bites a dog, that is news. - John B. Bogart

I was in the first submarine. Instead of a periscope, they had a kaleidoscope. "We're surrounded." - Steven Wright

Just because I have rice on my clothes doesn't mean I've been to a wedding. A Chinese man threw up on me. - Phyllis Diller

Why don't you put that in the headline: "He Only Did Three With Doris!" Set a lot of people straight. - Rock Hudson

It's amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fits the newspaper. - Jerry Seinfeld

When was the last time anybody saw us beating, let's say, China in a trade deal? They kill us. I beat China all the time. - Donald Trump

Why something in the public interest such as television news can be fought over, like a chain of hamburger stands, eludes me. - Jimmy Breslin

Living in China has made me appreciate my own country, with its tiny, ethnically diverse population of unassuming donut-eaters. - Jan Wong

As you've noticed, people don't want to be sold. What people do want is news and information about the things they care about. - Larry Weber

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks? - George Carlin

I do not like to get the news, because there has never been an era when so many things were going so right for so many of the wrong persons. - Ogden Nash

Oil prices have fallen lately. We include this news for the benefit of gas stations, which otherwise wouldn't learn of it for six months. - Bill Tammeus

I deal with foreign countries. I made a lot of money dealing against China. I've made a lot of money dealing against many other countries. - Donald Trump

I'll love you, dear, I'll love you till China and Africa meet and the river jumps over the mountain and the salmon sing in the street. - W H Auden

When written in Chinese, the word "crisis" is composed of two characters. One represents danger, and the other represents opportunity. - John F Kennedy

NBC News just called it "The Great Freeze" - coldest weather in years. Is our country still spending money on the global warming hoax? - Donald Trump

If one morning I walked on top of the water across the Potomac River, the headline that afternoon would read: "President Can't Swim." - Lyndon B. Johnson


Daddy, Can I Ride It?

Macklemore's grandad, Macklemost

Star Wars Howl

Swing Dad

Multi Task Dad

Twin Load

Sometimes Dads Are Wet For Work

Hospital Friends

Ways to say 'Dad' in Different Languages

Back Massage Track

Baby Sitting

Father Sayings for Father's Day

Desert Soccer Fans

Tight Fit Ship

Dog Fairy Tales

Dad's Ex-Ferrari

Dad's Turn

Sleep-In Dad

'Take Your Kid To Work' Day

Baby Shower

Nose Ring

Dad In Mind

Fresh Breath

Bare Bones Love