#1 humor site on the 'net

Sew It Seams

Sew what? For same day clothing alterations!

Sew It Seams thanks to Barry McCartney

QuotaBills
Engineering with fabric. - Jean Muir

As I get older, I just prefer to knit. - Tracey Ullman

I preferred sewing to bossing little children. - Martha Jones

A stitch in time would have confused Einstein. - Unknown

Fabrics doesn't make exquisite dresses, it is the stitches. - Treasure Stitches

I will resist the urge to underestimate the complexity of knitting. - Stephanie Pearl-McPhee

Happiness is having a large, caring, close-knit family in another city. - George Burns

You know you're overweight when you're living beyond your seams. - Unknown

I will continue to freak out my children by knitting in public. It's good for them. - Stephanie Pearl-McPhee

SABLE - A common knitting acronym that stands for Stash Acquisition Beyond Life Expectancy. - Stephanie Pearl-McPhee

Writing is like sewing together what I call these 'buttons,' these bits and pieces. - Sandra Cisneros

You haven't had enough coffee until you can thread a sewing machine while it's running. - Unknown

One has to look out for engineers - they begin with sewing machines and end up with the atomic bomb. - Marcel Pagnol

A good use for me is to let me go away with my sewing machine and come back with some really new stuff. - Betsey Johnson

My regular life today is reading books, making dolls houses, sewing dolls with my daughter and barbequing. - Milla Jovovich

You cannot tailor-make the situations in life, but you can tailor-make the attitudes to fit those situations. - Zig Ziglar

Properly practiced, knitting soothes the troubled spirit, and it doesn't hurt the untroubled spirit either. - Elizabeth Zimmermann

When I moved out of my mom's house at 18 I was almost as sad to leave her sewing machine behind as anything else. - Beth Ditto

There is practically no activity that cannot be enhanced or replaced by knitting, if you really want to get obsessive about it. - Stephanie Pearl-McPhee

I am certain that a Sewing Machine would relieve as much human suffering as a hundred Lunatic Asylums, and possibly a good deal more. - Margaret Atwood

He who cannot change the very fabric of his thought will never be able to change reality, and will never, therefore, make any progress. - Anwar Sadat

When a man's suit fits, when the construction is beautiful, when the sewing and fabrics are there - in the end, you'll look the best in it. - John Varvatos

I'm always tinkering with something - suddenly I'll think I can work with wood, but then I'll realize I can't, so I go back to sewing. - Melissa McCarthy

My husband went through a phase of giving me vacuum cleaners, sewing machines and Mixmasters. It's ironic. He is encouraging me to develop a hobby, I think. - Cate Blanchett

As an adult and a parent, when I'm not acting, I'm not acting. I'm being a parent, and I'm on the school run, and I'm sewing labels onto socks. - Kate Winslet

The only man I know who behaves sensibly is my tailor. He takes my measurements anew each time he sees me. The rest go on with their old measurements and expect me to fit them. - George Bernard Shaw

My apartment has a semblance of a storage facility. It's just stacks, there are no bookshelves, just books and piles of stamp collections and weird little sewing and knitting projects. - Sufjan Stevens

I have written most of my melodies walking and I feel it is definitely one of the most helpful ways of sewing all of the different things in your life together and seeing the whole picture. - Bjork


It's Not My Job

Mathematician's Truck

Redneck Baby Stroller

Redneck Estate Sale

Blonde Car Mirror

Corn Maze Warning

Lane Closure

Texting For Dummies

Clever Weather Billboard

Tree Huggers

Australian Construction Security

India Road Assistance

Cow Walking

Cultural Exchange

Meowzart

Bonus Baby

Strawberry Heart

Water Skiing in Russia

Plumber's Party

Hand Face

Moon Harvest

Reach For The High-Hanging Fruit

CheckMate

Ship Tow