#1 humor site on the 'net

Redneck Turkey Shoot

Bubba makes it a family affair in the restroom

Redneck Turkey Shoot thanks to Jim Serritella

Redneck Turkey Shoot thanks to Jim Serritella

QuotaBills
Hollywood is like Picasso's bathroom. - Candice Bergen

Eternity is two people and a roast turkey. - James Dent

Here he comes, swelling like a turkey-cock. - William Shakespeare

A turkey never voted for an early Christmas. - Unknown

Always go to the bathroom when you have a chance. - King George V

I write poems like some people sing in the bathroom. - Amit Bhatia

I would rather sleep in a bathroom than in another hotel. - Billy Wilder

Endangered forests are being slaughtered for toilet paper. - Daphne Zuniga

A peacock that rests on his feathers is just another turkey. - Dolly Parton

The kitchen. The bathroom. The yin and yang of the household. - David C. Holley

Everyone makes fun of the Redneck until the Zombie Apocalypse. - Unknown

There's a lot involved in going to the bathroom for women. - Leah Remini

I used to practice Tony speeches in my bathroom with my hairbrush. - Audra McDonald

Every bathroom in my house will ultimately have a Toto bidet in it. - Ken Marino

Running is an unnatural act, except from enemies and to the bathroom. - Unknown

Cooking Tip: Wrap turkey leftovers in aluminum foil and throw them out. - Nicole Hollander

My honeymoon night was spent on the floor in the bathroom with my mother. - Ronnie Spector

I started singing in the bathroom. Nothing was coming out. It was ghastly. - Rod Stewart

You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't. - Jeff Foxworthy

When I was younger I used to lock myself in the bathroom and read in the dry tub. - Karen Russell

The turkey is living proof that an animal can survive with no intelligence at all. - Harvey D. Comstock

Go see that turkey for yourself, and see for yourself why you shouldn't see it. - Samuel Goldwyn

There are two things that Jack Bauer never does. Show mercy, and go to the bathroom. - Kiefer Sutherland

I'd rather be able to face myself in the bathroom mirror than be rich and famous. - Ani DiFranco

At Disneyland, you never go 'backstage' - even when you're in the bathroom. - Hideo Kojima

France is a country where the money falls apart but you can't tear the toilet paper. - Billy Wilder

I love Thanksgiving turkey - it's the only time in Los Angeles that you see natural breasts. - Arnold Schwarzenegger

Castro couldn't even go to the bathroom unless the Soviet Union put the nickel in the toilet. - Richard M Nixon

At a formal dinner party, the person nearest death should always be seated closest to the bathroom. - George Carlin

I do like to read in bed, but because I have two kids I'm often forced to read in the bathroom. - Eoin Colfer

If you don't want your dog to have bad breath, do what I do: pour a little Lavoris in the toilet. - Jay Leno

You might be a redneck if your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it. - Jeff Foxworthy

I sleep with a light on in the bathroom so I can see where I'm at, because I wake up and have no clue. - Carrie Underwood

The best measure of a man's honesty isn't his income tax return. It's the zero adjust on his bathroom scale. - Arthur C. Clarke

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car. - Erma Bombeck

I love lean meats like chicken, turkey. I'm obsessed with sushi and fish in general. I eat a lot of veggies and hummus. - Shawn Johnson

You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze

Men who consistently leave the toilet seat up secretly want women to get up to go the bathroom in the middle of the night and fall in. - Rita Rudner

We're having something a little different this year for Thanksgiving. Instead of a turkey, we're having a swan. You get more stuffing. - George Carlin

My wife was a make-up artist, and she's a total product junkie. Our bathroom is packed full of lotions and potions so I end up trying them out. - Robert Carlyle


Undergarment Financing

Shear Dog

Open For Business

This Rocks

Lifting Heavy Objects

Tomato Treat

Wrong Planet

Evaluating Something

Student Driver

Cat Milk

Guitar Pool

Facebook Africa

UniCorn

Less Is More

Taking The Bait

Puppy Circle

Prehistoric Flash Drive

Hair Weavers

Chemical Solutions

Stealth Snake

Coffee Morning

WrenchWare

Pushing The Envelope

Social Media Explained