#1 humor site on the 'net

Money Drop

Taking overnight donations at the Old West Cafe in Grapevine, Texas

Money Drop thanks to joe-kster

'If we’re closed please shove your money under the door.'

QuotaBills
Marry money. - Max Shulman

When one door shuts, a hundred open. - Spanish Proverb

A fool and his money are soon partying. - Steven Wright

Yacht: a floating box you throw money into. - Unknown

If you want the girl next door, go next door. - Joan Crawford

If opportunity doesn't knock, build a door. - Milton Berle

A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money. - WC Fields

Friendship is like money, easier made than kept. - Samuel Butler

All money is tainted, tain't none of it mine. - Thomas F. McGuire

Housekeeping is like being caught in a revolving door. - Marcelene Cox

Not knowing when the dawn will come I open every door. - Emily Dickinson

I don't like money, actually, but it quiets my nerves. - Joe Louis

Money is like manure. You have to spread it around or it smells. - J Paul Getty

I don't mind that I'm fat. You still get the same money. - Marlon Brando

The rich would have to eat money if the poor did not provide food. - Russia Proverb

The key to making money in stocks is not to get scared out of them. - Peter Lynch

I was a great student at a great school, Wharton School of Finance. - Donald Trump

All I ask is the chance to prove that money can't make me happy. - Spike Milligan

A liberal is a man who is willing to spend somebody else's money. - Carter Glass

It's too late to close the stable door after the horse has bolted. - French Proverb

He who is outside his door has the hardest part of his journey behind him. - Flemish Proverb

Happiness often sneaks in through a door you didn't know you left open. - John Barrymore

Don't spend time beating on a wall, hoping to transform it into a door. - Coco Chanel

Will you marry me? Do you have any money?
Answer the second question first. - Groucho Marx

Temptation usually comes in through a door that has been deliberately left open. - Arnold Glasgow

Everybody needs his memories. They keep the wolf of insignificance from the door. - Saul Bellow

Do not hire a man who does your work for money, but him who does it for love of it. - Henry David Thoreau

France is a country where the money falls apart but you can't tear the toilet paper. - Billy Wilder

Half the money I spend on advertising is wasted; the trouble is, I don't know which half. - John Wannamaker

Money itself doesn't interest me. But you must make money to go on building the business. - Rupert Murdoch

The chief value of money lies in the fact that one lives in a world in which it is overestimated. - H L Mencken

Bathtubs are the epitome of luxury. Either you have no money to own one or you have no time to use one. - Akilnathan Logeswaran

A good financial plan is a road map that shows us exactly how the choices we make today will affect our future. - Alexa Von Tobel

Money was never a big motivation for me, except as a way to keep score. The real excitement is playing the game. - Donald Trump

The only security men can have for their political liberty, consists in keeping their money in their own pockets. - Lysander Spooner

Having more money doesn't make you happier. I have 50 million dollars but I'm just as happy as when I had 48 million. - Arnold Schwarzenegger

In general, the art of government consists of taking as much money as possible from one party of the citizens to give to the other. - Voltaire

How you spend your time is more important than how you spend your money. Money mistakes can be corrected, but time is gone forever. - David B. Norris

Let advertisers spend the same amount of money improving their product that they do on advertising and they wouldn't need to advertise it. - Will Rogers

When one door of happiness closes, another opens, but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one that has been opened for us. - Helen Keller


Redneck Tree Fort

OCD Guy

World's Tallest Bus

Long Liquor Store

Happy Wood Pig

On Top Of Things

Anail Retention

Bat Flight

The No Brainer

Truck Bender

Bacon Balls

Fast Closure

Ukrainian Feast

1934 Modern Home

Fliptus

Copper Tubing Specialist

Bach Off Van

Boss Resume

Canadian Gun Shop

Hogwart's Other Bridge

Excalibutter

As The World Turns

Bird Condo

Legal Assistance For All