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Meet Your Future Ex-Wife

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Meet Your Future Ex-Wife thanks to Chris Johnson

QuotaBills
Beer speaks. People mumble. - Tony McGee

Gin was mother's milk to her. - George Bernard Shaw

The future ain't what it used to be. - Yogi Berra

I'm Hybrid. I run on chocolate and wine. - Unknown

The dead are merely the countrymen of my future. - Dean Koontz

Hindsight. It's like foresight without a future. - Kevin Kline

There is no future for a people who deny their past. - Adam Clayton Powell Jr.

I cook with wine; sometimes I even add it to the food. - WC Fields

I like men who have a future and women who have a past. - Oscar Wilde

Hard work pays off in the future, laziness pays off now. - Steven Wright

It was 2:00 p.m., too early for wine but not for chocolate. - Andrea Hurst

What two ideas are more inseparable than Beer and Britannia? - Sydney Smith

I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already. - Tommy Cooper

Here are some names to look forward to - perhaps in the future. - David Coleman

Let him who would enjoy a good future waste none of his present. - Roger Babson

Memorial services are the cocktail parties of the geriatric set. - Ralph Richardson

Ah, good ol' trustworthy beer. My love for you will never die. - Homer Simpson

Give me a woman who truly loves beer and I will conquer the world. - Kaiser Willhelm II

The future you shall know when it has come; before then forget it. - Aeschylus

Whenever you want to marry someone, go have lunch with his ex-wife. - Shelley Winters

Our faith in the present dies out long before our faith in the future. - Ruth Benedict

Too much of anything is bad. Too much of good whisky is barely enough. - Mark Twain

To alcohol! The cause of - and solution to - all of life's problems. - Homer Simpson

Curb your fretting, tadpole, or the frog of your future will fail to croak. - Paul Collins

Hold on to a ray of hope, and a promise of future... and follow your dreams. - Unknown

In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. - Ben Franklin

Any lack of confidence in the economic future of the United States is foolish. - Herbert Hoover

Look to the future, because that is where you'll spend the rest of your life. - George Burns

Descartes commanded the future from his study more than Napoleon from the throne. - Oliver Holmes

There's no present. There's only the immediate future and the recent past. - George Carlin

Logic, like whiskey, loses its beneficial effect when taken in too large quantities. - Lord Dunsany

If we tried to sink the past beneath our feet, be sure the future would not stand it. - Elizabeth Barrett Browning

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke

You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar. - Groucho Marx

I love to sing, and I love to drink scotch. Most people would rather hear me drink scotch. - George Burns

When Jack Benny has a party, you not only bring your own scotch, you bring your own rocks. - George Burns

We cannot always build the future for our youth, but we can build our youth for the future. - Franklin D Roosevelt

That man is prudent who neither hopes nor fears anything from the uncertain events of the future. - Anatole France

Happiness is not something you postpone for the future; it is something you design for the present. - Jim Rohn

I'm making wine at home, but I'm making it out of raisins so it will be aged automatically. - Steven Wright

Family faces are magic mirrors. Looking at people who belong to us, we see the past, present and future. - Gail L. Buckley

Ninety percent I'll spend on good times, women and Irish Whiskey. The other ten percent I'll probably waste. - Tug McGraw

You pretty much can't get away from bacon or whiskey in the South. Put a doughnut in it and you'd be good to go. - Hillary Scott

It was so quiet, a reservation kind of quiet, where you can hear somebody drinking whiskey on the rocks three miles away. - Sherman Alexie

Neither a wise man nor a brave man lies down on the tracks of history to wait for the train of the future to run over him. - Dwight D Eisenhower

I try to learn from the past, but I plan for the future by focusing exclusively on the present. That's where the fun is. - Donald Trump

I have made an important discovery - that alcohol, taken in sufficient quantities, produces all the effects of intoxication. - Oscar Wilde

Canceled checks will be to future historians and cultural anthropologists what the Dead Sea Scrolls and hieroglyphics are to us. - Brent Staples

Alcohol is not in my vodkabulary. However, I looked it up on whiskeypedia and learned if you drink too much of it, it's likely tequilya. - Unknown

Morals are not, like bacon, to be cured by hanging; nor, like wine, to be improved by sea voyages; nor, like honey, to be preserved in cells. - William Taylor


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