#1 humor site on the 'net

House Wrap

Cottage dream in the country

House Wrap thanks to Barry McCartney

Turning expectations in unique house design ideas

QuotaBills
An old man in a house is a good sign. - Benjamin Franklin

Oscar night at my house is called Passover. - Bob Hope

I use a Mac to help me design the next Cray. - Seymoure Cray

A road to a friend's house is never long. - Danish Proverb

A spotless house is a sign of a misspent life. - Unknown

There are no elevators in the house of success. - H.H. Vreeland

Heaven is home. Utopia is here. Nirvana is now. - Edward Abbey

Pedestrian: a man whose son is home from college. - Unknown

I had to sink my yacht to make the guests go home. - F Scott Fitzgerald

It is easier to demolish a house than to build one. - Irish proverb

He that troubleth his own house shall inherit the wind. - The Bible

Home is not where you live but where they understand you. - Christion Morgenstern

He taught me housekeeping; when I divorce I keep the house. - Zsa Zsa Gabor

I can't clean house and save the world at the same time. - Unknown

I have so much hair, I have a separate wig closet in my house. - Sherri Shepherd

A house with old furniture has no need of ghosts to be haunted. - Hope Mirrlees

Go often to the house of a friend, for weeds choke the unused path. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

What can you do to promote world peace? Go home and love your family. - Mother Teresa

Tell her I ain't crawlin' home to her with my tail between her legs. - Archie Bunker

I bought a house on a one-way dead-end road. I don't know how I got there. - Steven Wright

I love contemporary art, although I wouldn't want a pickled shark in my house. - Bruno Tonioli

I stayed up all night playing poker with tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. - Steven Wright

It's not my fault I was dragged out of my house by a mob and forced to predict the weather. - Punxsutawney Phil

In my house on the ceilings I have paintings of the rooms above, so I never have to go upstairs. - Steven Wright

You leave home to seek your fortune and, when you get it, you go home and share it with your family. - Anita Baker

When a man has no design but to speak plain truth, he may say a great deal in a very narrow compass. - Sir Richard Steele

You need a plan to build a house. To build a life, it is even more important to have a plan or goal. - Zig Ziglar

You have a cough? Go home tonight, eat a whole box of Ex-Lax - tomorrow you'll be afraid to cough. - Pearl Williams

A woman should cleave into her husband. Right here in this house is where Edith's cleavage belongs. - Archie Bunker

It is our art that has an opportunity to leave a footprint in the sand. They don't wrap fish in our work. - Hugh N Jacobsen

The house smelled musty and damp, and a little sweet, as if it were haunted by the ghosts of long-dead cookies. - Neil Gaiman

There's nothing to match curling up with a good book when there's a repair job to be done around the house. - Joe Ryan

What's a good investment? Go home from work early and spend the afternoon throwing a ball around with your son. - Ben Stein

We can't win at home, we can't win away. As general manager, I just can't figure out where else to play. - Jock Brown

My house is on the median strip of a highway. You don't really notice, except I have to leave the driveway doing 60 MPH. - Steven Wright

I am like a pelican of the wilderness: I am like an owl of the desert. I watch, and am as a sparrow alone upon the house-top. - Bible

My friend Sally is a nudist. I went to her house. The closets have no doors. The walls are covered with see-through wallpaper. - Steven Wright

Talking is a hydrant in the yard and writing is a faucet upstairs in the house. Opening the first takes the pressure off the second. - Robert Frost

I was born by Caesarian section... but not so you'd notice. It's just that when I leave a house, I go out through the window. - Steven Wright

One of my biggest fears is that I'm going to die alone in my home, and my cats will eat me because I am too dead to open their food cans. - Kelli Jae Baeli


AirHeads

Redneck Power Windows

Race Break

Mirror Fence

Look Both Ways

No-iPhone Kids

Dog Haircut

Loose Lips Sink Ships

Donkey Refill

Self Portrait for Squirrels

Coin Stacking

Hooking Penalty

Zebra Bus Stop

Best Friend Theft

Chewie, We're Home

Police Rides

Bird Smoker

Hot Mexican Deals

Coffin Escape

African Airlines

Who Let The Dogs Out?

Autographed Copy

Fresh Air Computing

Porpoise Pilots