#1 humor site on the 'net

Bookstore Entrance

Capstone books at Le Bal de Ardents, Lyon, France

Bookstore Entrance thanks to Clarice Renaud

QuotaBills
I don't read books. I write them. - Henry Kissinger

Books and chocolate make life bearable. - Unknown

Americans like fat books and thin women. - Russell Baker

Why don't you write books people can read? - Nora Joyce

When I was your age, television was called books. - William Goldman

If you think you have it tough, read history books. - Bill Maher

At night, here in the library, the ghosts have voices. - Alberto Manguel

I have always imagined that Paradise will be a kind of library. - Jorge Luis Borges

The best books... are those that tell you what you know already. - George Orwell

The success that the Tolkien books had redefined modern fantasy. - George R.R. Martin

Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint. - Mark Twain

If you have a garden and a library, you have everything you need. - Cicero

Books should be tried by a judge and jury as though they were crimes. - Samuel Butler

We shouldn't teach great books; we should teach a love of reading. - B.F. Skinner

There are books of which the backs and covers are by far the best parts. - Charles Dickens

Good friends, good books and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life. - Mark Twain

Next to acquiring good friends, the best acquisition is that of good books. - Charles Caleb Colton

Books are no different from goats - they enjoy an afternoon out on the lawn. - Kate Bernheimer

The worst thing about new books is that they keep us from reading the old ones. - John Wooden

Books are as useful to a stupid person as a mirror is useful to a blind person. - Chanakya

There is more treasure in books than all the pirate's loot on treasure island. - Walt Disney

No man can be called friendless when he has God and the companionship of good books. - Elizabeth Barrett Browning

If sex is such a natural phenomenon, how come there are so many books on how to do it? - Bette Midler

There is more stupidity than hydrogen in the universe, and it has a longer shelf life. - Frank Zappa

There is no such thing as a moral or an immoral book. Books are well written, or badly written. - Oscar Wilde

It's not uncommon to see kids on the school bus reading books and doing homework on the bus. - Anthony Amero

Parents should leave books lying around marked "forbidden" if they want their children to read. - Doris Lessing

My regular life today is reading books, making dolls houses, sewing dolls with my daughter and barbequing. - Milla Jovovich

Wanting to meet a writer because you like their books is like wanting to meet a duck because you like pate. - Margaret Atwood

If you only read the books that everyone else is reading, you can only think what everyone else is thinking. - Haruki Murakami

It is books that teach us to refine our pleasures when young, and to recall them with satisfaction when we are old. - Leigh Hunt

Five years from now, you're the same person except for the people you've met and the books you've read. - John Wooden

Keeping books on social aid is capitalistic nonsense. I just use the money for the poor. I can't stop to count it. - Evita Peron

What progress we are making. In the Middle Ages they would have burned me. Now they are content with burning my books. - Sigmund Freud

The biggest seller is cookbooks and the second is diet books - how not to eat what you've just learned now to cook. - Andy Rooney

I had plenty of pimples as a kid. One day I fell asleep in the library. When I woke up, a blind man was reading my face. - Rodney Dangerfield

If my books had been any worse, I should not have been invited to Hollywood, and if they had been any better, I should not have come. - Raymond Chandler

Today's public figures can no longer write their own speeches or books, and there is some evidence that they can't read them either. - Gore Vidal

Books are the quietest and most constant of friends; they are the most accessible and wisest of counselors, and the most patient of teachers. - Charles W. Eliot

Meditation here may think down hours to moments. Here the heart may give a useful lesson to the head and learning wiser grow without his books. - William Cowper


Ukrainian Feast

1934 Modern Home

Fliptus

Copper Tubing Specialist

Bach Off Van

Boss Resume

Canadian Gun Shop

Hogwart's Other Bridge

Excalibutter

As The World Turns

Bird Condo

Legal Assistance For All

Chinese Law School

Do Not Stack

Stairway Chute

Walkway Not

Pirate Vacation

How Not To Prop Start Your Plane

Redneck Spaghetti

Wild Game Nutrition Guide

Alaska Gas

Definition Of A Good Friend

Redneck Car Repair

Self-Propelled Rocket