#1 humor site on the 'net

Virtual Air Canada

Latest air safety guide: Do Not Exit Plane During Flight

Virtual Air Canada thanks to Emery Pettigrove

QuotaBills
I got bigger fish to fly - Archie Bunker

Mothers are angels that lift us when we cannot fly. - Unknown

Never drive faster than your guardian angel can fly. - Unknown

You cannot fly like an eagle with the wings of a wren. - William Henry Hudson

If God wanted us to fly, He would have given us tickets. - Mel Brooks

He imagines a necessary joy in things that must fly to eat. - Wendell Berry

I think being a dragon would be pretty awesome... you get to fly. - Josh Keaton

Disappointments are to the soul what thunderstorms are to the air. - Johann C. F. von Schiller

It is now possible for a flight attendant to get a pilot pregnant. - Richard J. Ferris

Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines. - Steven Wright

Our Air Corps reunion was held to rememmorate the great things we done. - Archie Bunker

I love Halloween: the cold air, the spooky dangers lurking around the corner. - Evan Peters

Airplane travel is nature's way of making you look like your passport photo. - Al Gore

If God had intended us to fly he would have made it easier to get to the airport. - Jonathan Winters

He who waits for a roast duck to fly into his mouth must wait a very, very long time. - Chinese Proverb

My tent doesn't look like much but it is air-conditioned and has exceptional location. - Fennel Hudson

Old age is like a plane flying through a storm. Once you are aboard, there is nothing you can do. - Golda Meir

We breathe air, trees make air, homework kills trees, therefore homework is going to kill us all. - Unknown

Caesar dreamed that he was flying above the clouds, and now that he was clasping the hand of Jupiter. - Suetonius

I don't like all this fresh air: I'm from Los Angeles; I don't trust any air I can't see. - Bob Hope

Music gives a soul to the universe, wings to the mind, flight to the imagination, and life to everything. - Plato

The scientific theory I like best is that the rings of Saturn are composed entirely of lost airline luggage. - Mark Russell

I am the astronaut of boxing. Joe Louis and Jack Dempsey were just jet pilots. I'm in a world of my own. - Muhammad Ali

Give me my golf clubs, fresh air, and a beautiful partner, and you can keep my golf clubs and the fresh air. - Jack Benny

When everything seems to be going against you, remember that the airplane takes off against the wind, not with it. - Henry Ford

Concentrating on poses clears the mind, while focusing on the breath helps the body shift out of fight or flight mode. - Melanie Haiken

The only people flying to Europe will be terrorists, so it will be, "Will you be sitting in armed or unarmed?" - Robin Williams

Aerodynamically the bumblebee shouldn't be able to fly, but the bumblebee doesn't know so it goes flying anyway. - Mary Kay Ash

The reason birds can fly and we can't is simply because they have perfect faith, for to have faith is to have wings. - J.M. Barrie

There's so much pollution in the air now that if it weren't for our lungs there'd be no place to put it all. - Robert Orben

Bruce Lee's fast pace, Jet Li's pretty style and Jet Li's acrobatics combine with Muay Thai for my own style. - Tony Jaa

If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put foundations under them. - Henry David Thoreau

It's better to swim in the sea below
Than to swing in the air and feed the crow,
Says jolly Ned Teach of Bristol. - Benjamin Franklin

Aim at the sun, and you may not reach it; but your arrow will fly far higher than if aimed at an object on a level with yourself. - Joel Hawes

If Beethoven had been killed in a plane crash at the age of twenty-two, it would have changed the history of music... and of aviation. - Tom Stoppard

Southwest Airlines is successful because the company understands it's a customer service company. It also happens to be an airline. - Harvey Mackay

If the "black box" flight recorder is never damaged during a plane crash, why isn't the whole airplane made out of that stuff? - George Carlin

A neurotic is a man who builds a castle in the air. A psychotic is the man who lives in it. And a psychiatrist is a man who collects the rent. - Lord Webb-Johnson

A nation that destroys its soils destroys itself. Forests are the lungs of our land, purifying the air and giving fresh strength to our people. - Franklin D Roosevelt

From lessening negativity to boosting creativity, hiking in fresh air actually boosts brain power and can help certain parts of the brain grow. - Meredith Carey


UniCorn

Puppy Circle

Wrong Planet

Scottish Weather Forecast

Chemical Solutions

Stealth Snake

Turn Into Lanes

Hair Weavers

WrenchWare

Missing File

Pumping Services

Coffee Morning

Social Media Explained

One Tough Lady!

Sleep With Us

Bull Squirrel

Child Tax Lesson

Just Thinking

Boneless Bananas

He Might Wait A Long Time

Do Not Disturb

Life of Freedom and Peace

Fallen Heroes

Lest We Forget