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Redneck Plane Repair

How Bubba the Mechanic gets cheap airfare

Redneck Plane Repair thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

QuotaBills
Heavier-than-air flying machines are impossible. - Lord Kelvin

Never drive faster than your guardian angel can fly. - Unknown

Angels can fly because they take themselves lightly. - G K Chesterton

You cannot fly like an eagle with the wings of a wren. - William Henry Hudson

Feet, what do I need you for when I have wings to fly? - Frida Kahlo

The time to repair the roof is when the sun is shining. - John F Kennedy

If God wanted us to fly, He would have given us tickets. - Mel Brooks

Luck is like having a rice dumpling fly into your mouth. - Japanese Proverb

As the velocity of air increases, its pressure decreases. - Daniel Bernoulli

If God wanted us to fly, he would have given us air tickets. - Mel Brooks

I think being a dragon would be pretty awesome... you get to fly. - Josh Keaton

The shortest distance between two points is usually under repair. - Unknown

Disappointments are to the soul what thunderstorms are to the air. - Johann C. F. von Schiller

It is now possible for a flight attendant to get a pilot pregnant. - Richard J. Ferris

Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines. - Steven Wright

If ever a chef were to cook a fly, he would keep the breast for himself. - Poland Proverb

Something in the air this morning made me feel like flying... Spring Flight - Eileen Granfors

Thank God men cannot as yet fly and lay waste the sky as well as the earth. - Henry David Thoreau

If women can be railroad workers in Russia, why can't they fly in space? - Valentina Tereshkova

The nation that secures control of the air will ultimately control the world. - Alexander Graham Bell

I love Halloween: the cold air, the spooky dangers lurking around the corner. - Evan Peters

If God had intended us to fly he would have made it easier to get to the airport. - Jonathan Winters

There are two kind of air travel in the United States, first class and third world. - Bobby Slayton

Hold fast to dreams, for if dreams die, life is a broken winged bird that cannot fly. - Lanston Hughes

My mechanic told me, "I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder." - Steven Wright

Old age is like a plane flying through a storm. Once you are aboard, there is nothing you can do. - Golda Meir

We breathe air, trees make air, homework kills trees, therefore homework is going to kill us all. - Unknown

Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the clubs and the fresh air. - Jack Benny

Caesar dreamed that he was flying above the clouds, and now that he was clasping the hand of Jupiter. - Suetonius

Music gives a soul to the universe, wings to the mind, flight to the imagination, and life to everything. - Plato

When everything seems to be going against you, remember that the airplane takes off against the wind, not with it. - Henry Ford

A fly, Sir, may sting a stately horse and make him wince; but, one is but an insect, and the other is a horse still. - Samuel Johnson

Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
So just what are time flies, and why do they fly like an arrow? - Groucho Marx

The reason birds can fly and we can't is simply because they have perfect faith, for to have faith is to have wings. - J.M. Barrie

It's better to swim in the sea below
Than to swing in the air and feed the crow,
Says jolly Ned Teach of Bristol. - Benjamin Franklin

Aim at the sun, and you may not reach it; but your arrow will fly far higher than if aimed at an object on a level with yourself. - Joel Hawes

I put my air conditioner in backwards. It got cold outside. The weatherman on TV was confused. "It was supposed to be hot today." - Steven Wright

If the "black box" flight recorder is never damaged during a plane crash, why isn't the whole airplane made out of that stuff? - George Carlin

Love is like jumping out of an airplane with no parachute. But there’s no need to be frightened, because that plane is still on the ground. - Jarod Kintz

This is love: to fly toward a secret sky, to cause a hundred veils to fall each moment. First to let go of life. Finally, to take a step without feet. - Rumi


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