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Christmas Sidecar

Harvesting a Christmas tree in the good old days

Christmas Sidecar thanks to Vera Densen

QuotaBills
Thank God kids never mean well. - Lily Tomlin

A turkey never voted for an early Christmas. - Unknown

Raising kids is part joy and part guerrilla warfare. - Ed Asner

With kids, the days are long, but the years are short. - John Leguizamo

Kids are life's only guaranteed bona fide upside surprise. - Jack Nicholson

Kids. They're not easy. But there has to be some penalty for sex. - Bill Maher

Raising kids make most people, including me, grow up at least a little. - Madonna

All kids are gifted: some just open their packages earlier than others. - Michael Carr

The last thing my kids ever did to earn money was lose their baby teeth. - Phyllis Diller

Silence is golden unless you have kids. Then silence is just suspicious. - Unknown

Kids: they dance before they learn there is anything that isn't music. - William Stafford

That's all the motorcycle is, a system of concepts worked out in steel. - Robert M. Pirsig

The hardest job kids face today is learning good manners without seeing any. - Fred Astaire

Nothing's as mean as giving a little child something useful for Christmas. - Kin Hubbard

The most effective form of birth control I know is spending the day with my kids. - Jill Bensley

My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor. - Phyllis Diller

If my Valentine you won't be,
I'll hang myself on your Christmas tree. - Ernest Hemingway

My wife and I have a tradition of popcorn and videos with our kids on Friday evenings. - Ozwald Boateng

Hopefully, kids realize you can do anything you want. Skateboarding can be that gateway. - Ryan Sheckler

If we would listen to our kids, we'd discover that they are largely self-explanatory. - Robert Brault

Most motorcycle problems are caused by the nut that connects the handlebars to the saddle. - Unknown

I want to have a bunch of kids so I can open a factory and have free labor. Beat that, China! - Jarod Kintz

I still have my Christmas Tree. I looked at it today. Sure enough, I couldn't see any forests. - Steven Wright

I do like to read in bed, but because I have two kids I'm often forced to read in the bathroom. - Eoin Colfer

The Christmas season has come to mean the period when the public plays Santa Claus to the merchants. - John Andrew Holmes

The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree: the presence of a family all wrapped up in each other. - Bill Vaughan

No matter how long we've been together Edith, you still, as the kids say, "turn me over." - Archie Bunker

All kids are trouble, Edith. And I don't wanna spend my reclining years trying to raise another one. - Archie Bunker

Every boy needs a role model that he can be proud of and talk about to the other kids in the playground. - Athol Fugard

Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing is like shovelling the walk before it stops snowing. - Phyllis Diller

One in four kids have either pre-diabetes or diabetes - what I like to call diabesity. How did this happen? - Mark Hyman

Might make a real good Christmas present for the uninformed. The book is called 'Taking America Back.' - Paul Harvey

I love to go to a movie, get a Diet Coke and a barrel of popcorn, and sit there with my kids and watch a film. - William Shatner

A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together. - Garrison Keillor

People are more violently opposed to fur than leather because it's safer to harass rich women than motorcycle gangs. - Unknown

There's no such thing as a soul. It's just something they made up to scare kids, like the bogeyman or Michael Jackson. - Bart Simpson

You know your kids are growing up when they stop asking you where they came from and refuse to tell you where they're going. - P.J. O'Rourke

When it comes to hockey, it's been in my blood since I was 3 or 4 years old. I love coaching the kids, especially at that level. - Mario Lemieux

If you want your kids to listen to you, don't yell at them. Whisper. Make them lean in. My kids taught me that. I do it with adults now. - Mario Batali

Like all parents, my husband and I just do the best we can, and hold our breath and hope we've set aside enough money for our kids' therapy. - Michelle Pfeiffer


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