#1 humor site on the 'net

Winter Deflation

Sometimes it doesn't pay to be full of hot air

Winter Deflation thanks to Wayne Nowazek

Blowing up a balloon to see it blowing down

Party balloon supplies for cold weather locations

QuotaBills
And after winter folweth grene May. - Geoffrey Chaucer

I used to be Snow White, but I drifted. - Mae West

You bring your own weather to the picnic. - Harlan Coben

Cursing the weather is never good farming. - English Proverb

An old man in love is like a flower in winter. - Portuguese Proverb

If I melt dry ice, can I swim without getting wet? - Steven Wright

An end is in sight to the severe weather shortage. - Ian Macaskill

Some say the world will end in fire, some say in ice. - Robert Frost

The groundhog said six more weeks of winter so I ate him. - Wile E. Coyote

Never take a job where winter winds can blow up your pants. - Geraldo Rivera

The coldest winter I ever spent was summer in San Francisco. - Mark Twain

I don't jog. It makes the ice jump right out of my glass. - David Lee Roth

I used to jog but the ice cubes kept falling out of my glass. - David Lee Roth

The wagon rests in winter, the sleigh in summer, the horse never. - Yiddish Proverb

The time will come when winter will ask what you were doing all summer. - Henry Clay

If you want to make everyone happy, don't be a leader. Sell ice cream. - Steve Jobs

Wherever you go, no matter what the weather, always bring your own sunshine. - Anthony J. D'Angelo

News events are like Texas weather. If you don't like it, wait a minute. - Jessica Savitch

It is only in sorrow bad weather masters us; in joy we face the storm and defy it. - Amelia Barr

Sun salutations can energize and warm you, even on the darkest, coldest winter day. - Carol Krucoff

Advice from your friends is like the weather, some of it is good, some of it is bad. - Unknown

Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow. - Jeff Valdez

I don't make plans, because life is short and unpredictable - much like the weather. - Al Roker

Let's get an extended weather forecast from a jittery, inconsistent, reddish brown rodent. - Unknown

There's one good thing about snow: it makes your lawn look as nice as your neighbor's. - Clyde Moore

It's not my fault I was dragged out of my house by a mob and forced to predict the weather. - Punxsutawney Phil

A good wife is one who can mow the lawn in the summer and put up the storm windows in the winter. - WC Fields

Just 'cause there's snow in the basement don't mean there ain't no fire in the roof! - Archie Bunker

I believe Ronald Reagan can make this country what it once was... a large Arctic region covered with ice. - Robin Williams

Usually the thing that signifies that I'm done with the winter and all that is that I start skateboarding. - Shaun White

All the plants in my house are dead - I shot them last night. I was teasing them by watering them with ice cubes. - Steven Wright

Too much sun after a Syracuse winter does strange things to your head, makes you feel strong, even if you aren't. - Laurie H. Anderson

For all of the fights I have had in my life, both on and off the ice, I have only been in the back of a cop car once. - Tie Domi

When you're stressed, eat ice cream, cake, chocolate and sweets. Why? Because stressed spelled backwards is desserts. - Unknown

The only thing more depressing than another six weeks of winter would be having to spend them in Punxsutawney, Pennsylvania. - Unknown

Everyone knows that ice cream is worth the trouble of being cold. Like all things virtuous, you have to suffer to gain the reward. - Brandon Sanderson

If we had no winter, the spring would not be so pleasant; if we did not sometimes taste of adversity, prosperity would not be so welcome. - Anne Bradstreet

My advice to you is not to inquire why or whither, but just enjoy your ice cream while it's on your plate - that's my philosophy. - Thornton Wilder

Winter is the time for comfort, for good food and warmth, for the touch of a friendly hand and for a talk beside the fire: it is the time for home. - Edith Sitwell

I love the scents of winter! For me, it's all about the feeling you get when you smell pumpkin spice, cinnamon, nutmeg, gingerbread and spruce. - Taylor Swift


Cultivator

Hazardous Materials Data Sheet for Woman

TP Safety

Crochet Shorts

Wine Bottle Recycling

Garden Outhouse

Alberta Winter Fridge

Wheelbarrow Wheelies

Redneck Deer Stand

Bucket Seat

Security Camera Setup

Smithton Stoneys

Hearse Parking

Just Saying Goodbye

Golden End of the Rainbow

Redneck Shower

Thank You For Driving

Debbie's Fridge

Just Be Ugly

Ex-Benedict

Scubaru

Irish Handcuffs

Irish Flu Shots

Wee Shamrock