#1 humor site on the 'net

Stinger Beach

How to treat Jellyfish stings

Stinger Beach thanks to Eddy Joyce, Armadale, West Australia

New Queensland study raises doubts about effectiveness of vinegar

Jellyfish are free-swimming marine animals consisting of a gelatinous umbrella-shaped bell and trailing tentacles

QuotaBills
Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee. - Muhammad Ali

Friendship is a plant we must often water. - German Proverb

Droughts are because god didn't pay his water bill. - Steven Wright

People run from rain but sit in bathtubs full of water. - Charles Bukowski

When I go to the beach, even the tide won't come in. - Phyllis Diller

Drown in a vat of whiskey? Oh death, where is thy sting? - WC Fields

One cannot collect all the beautiful shells on the beach. - Anne Morrow Lindbergh

You catch more flies with honey than you do with vinegar. - Unknown

If there is magic on this planet, it is contained in water. - Loren Eiseley

Ice Water? Get some Onions - that'll make your eyes water! - Groucho Marx

Say anything that you like about me except that I drink water. - WC Fields

I moved to Florida because you don't have to shovel water. - James Randi

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him float. - Unknown

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink. - English Proverb

Don't think there are no crocodiles because the water is calm. - Malayan Proverb

If his IQ slips any lower, we'll have to water him twice a day. - Molly Ivins

Men are like wine. Some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age. - Pope John XXIII

I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it. - WC Fields

An entire ocean can't sink a ship unless it allows the water inside. - Donna Smith

When in doubt as to the applicability of a disinfectant, use soap and water. - Martin H. Fischer

I finally found out how priests get holy water. They boil the hell out of it. - Joan Rivers

You can lead a horse to water but I'd rather ride it to the liquor store. - Wayne Nowazek

In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. - Ben Franklin

Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water. - WC Fields

The dignity of movement of an iceberg is due to only one ninth of it being above water. - Ernest Hemingway

We should be as water, which is lower than all things yet stronger even than the rocks. - Sioux Proverb

It's a strange world of language in which skating on thin ice can get you into hot water. - Franklin P. Jones

If NASA really wants to find water on Mars, they should just send me there to hit a golf ball. - Gene Jaster

Tart words make no friends: A spoonful of honey will catch more flies than a gallon of vinegar. - Benjamin Franklin

I keep looking for one more teacher, only to find that fish learn from the water and birds learn from the sky. - Mark Nepo

Be like a duck, paddling and working very hard inside the water, but what everyone sees is a smiling and calm face. - Manoj Arora

Following his doctor's orders, Nikita (Khrushchev) has cut his drinking in half. He's leaving out the water. - Bob Hope

A fly, Sir, may sting a stately horse and make him wince; but, one is but an insect, and the other is a horse still. - Samuel Johnson

I love Canada. It makes a nice hat for America. When America runs out of water, it's the first place I'll go. - Ryan Reynolds

Menopause is thicker than water. When we talk and laugh about it, we learn and relax. It's a life transition, not a disease. - Unknown

Not all chemicals are bad. Without hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. - Dave Barry

Take a music bath once or twice a week for a few seasons, and you will find that it is to the soul what the water bath is to the body. - Oliver Wendell Holmes

A leader is not an administrator who loves to run others, but someone who carries water for his people, so that they can get on with their jobs. - Robert Townsend

Today was about chasing sun-rays, beach waves, and sunsets. All things beautiful that give you peace are worth chasing. Everything else isn't. - April M. Monterrosa

If one morning I walked on top of the water across the Potomac River, the headline that afternoon would read: "President Can't Swim." - Lyndon B. Johnson


Plywood Portrait

Subway Dinner

Trump Cross

Dubai-ous Hotel

Animal Rescue

Openish Hours

Jim's Happy Hour

Moses' Headache Relief

Medical Breakthrough

Burning Water

Math Watch

Mega Samurai Sudoku Puzzles

Elderly Rocker

Daddy, Can I Ride It?

Macklemore's grandad, Macklemost

Star Wars Howl

Swing Dad

Multi Task Dad

Twin Load

Sometimes Dads Are Wet For Work

Hospital Friends

Ways to say 'Dad' in Different Languages

Back Massage Track

Baby Sitting