#1 humor site on the 'net

Redneck Hayride

Bubba doubles as an Amish chauffeur in his spare time

Redneck Hayride thanks to Stan Krause

Travel plans for Amish and Redneck deluxe holidays

QuotaBills
If it swells, ride it! - Unknown

Not all those who wander are lost. - JRR Tolkien

The patient always lies on the couch. - Unknown

Travel is glamorous only in retrospect. - Paul Theroux

Last week I forgot how to ride a bicycle. - Steven Wright

The thicker the hay, the easier it is mowed. - Alaric the Goth

A wise traveler never despises his own country. - Carlo Goldoni

I was trying to daydream, but my mind kept wandering. - Steven Wright

Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness. - Mark Twain

Everyone makes fun of the Redneck until the Zombie Apocalypse. - Unknown

I don't own a camera, so I travel with a police sketch artist. - George Carlin

A good traveler has no fixed plans and is not intent upon arriving. - Lao-tzu

The world is a book and those who do not travel read only one page. - St. Augustine

We seem to want one vehicle to carry people and soccer balls and hay bales. - Franz von Holzhausen

In America there are two classes of travel - first class, and with children. - Robert Benchley

Airplane travel is nature's way of making you look like your passport photo. - Al Gore

A lie can travel halfway around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes. - Mark Twain

There are two kind of air travel in the United States, first class and third world. - Bobby Slayton

Too often travel, instead of broadening the mind, merely lengthens the conversation. - Elizabeth Drew

Love doesn't make the world go 'round. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile. - Franklin P. Jones

I like the map feature on the iPhone that tells me where I am, because I travel a lot. - Gary Shteyngart

While armchair travelers dream of going places, traveling armchairs dream of staying put. - Anne Tyler

A racehorse is an animal that can take several thousand people for a ride at the same time. - Marjorie Johnson

Why endeavor to straighten the road of life? The faster we travel, the less there is to see. - Helen Hayes

Like all great travelers, I have seen more than I remember, and remember more than I have seen. - Benjamin Disraeli

The months and days are the travelers of eternity. The years that come and go are also voyagers. - Matsuo Basho

Though we travel the world over to find the beautiful, we must carry it with us or we find it not. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

I took lessons in bicycle riding. But I could only afford half of them. Now I can ride a unicycle. - Steven Wright

There ain't no surer way to find out whether you like people or hate them than to travel with them. - Mark Twain

If I don't work, I'll be sitting on the couch watching TV, eating popcorn and getting like a cow. - Celia Cruz

Television remote controls encourage couch potatoes to exercise their options while broadening their base. - William Arthur Ward

You might be a redneck if your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it. - Jeff Foxworthy

I travel without barely any luggage. Just a second set of underwear and binoculars and a map and a toothbrush. - Werner Herzog

It is impossible to travel faster than the speed of light, and certainly not desirable, as one's hat keeps blowing off. - Woody Allen

We are all omnibuses in which our ancestors ride, and every now and then one of them sticks his head out and embarrasses us. - Oliver Wendell Holmes Sr.

Own only what you can always carry with you: know languages, know countries, know people. Let your memory be your travel bag. - Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn

If the marriage needs help, the answer almost always is have more fun. Drop your list of grievances and go ride a roller coaster. - Garrison Keillor

The whole object of travel is not to set foot on foreign land; it is at last to set foot on one's own country as a foreign land. - G K Chesterton

You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze

Halloween is one of my favorite days of the year. I have a strict rule: I don't work on Halloween and I won't travel on Halloween. - Simon Sinek


Just Like Grandpa

High Heel Diver

Leading Edge Climber

Garden Gnome Soccer

Florence Time

Bird Trio

Chess Sudoku Puzzles C

I Want My Own Room

Fish Flops

Lip Gloss

Beer Pong

Canadian High Five

Kodak Moment

Third Fiddle

Clown Down

African Car Wash

Pointless

Hebrew Sudoku Puzzles A

Fowl Soccer Coach

Atrophy Cure

Math Mug

Zidane Is Fast

Atheist Professor

Punctuation Matters