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Quit Your Wining

Bubba told his wife to stop drinking from afar

Quit Your Wining thanks to Manny Morongo

Would you like some whine with your wine?

QuotaBills
Wine is bottled poetry. - Robert Louis Stevenson

Payday came and with it beer. - Rudyard Kipling

Gin was mother's milk to her. - George Bernard Shaw

Does wine count as a serving of fruit? - Joe-kster

Religions change; beer and wine remain. - Hervey Allen

Whining is anger through a small opening. - Al Franken

You can never buy beer, you just rent it. - Archie Bunker

We only serve fine wine. Did you bring any? - Unknown

Beer. Now there's a temporary solution. - Homer Simpson

Good friends, like wine, get better with age. - Unknown

Step aside Coffee. This is a job for Alcohol. - Unknown

Everything's better with bacon and red wine. - Dianne Harman

What two ideas are more inseparable than Beer and Britannia? - Sydney Smith

I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already. - Tommy Cooper

Herb is the healing of a nation, alcohol is the destruction. - Bob Marley

I'm only a beer teetotaller, not a champagne teetotaller. - George Bernard Shaw

Stop trying to make everybody happy - you're not tequila. - Unknown

Drinking rum before noon makes you a pirate, not an alcoholic. - Unknown

God invented whiskey to prevent the Irish from ruling the world. - Irish Saying

Memorial services are the cocktail parties of the geriatric set. - Ralph Richardson

I'm aging like fine wine. I'm getting complex and fruity. - Unknown

You ought to get out of those wet clothes and into a dry martini. - Mae West

Ah, good ol' trustworthy beer. My love for you will never die. - Homer Simpson

I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me. - Winston Churchill

In heaven there is no beer...
That's why we drink ours here. - Unknown

A raise is like a martini: it elevates the spirit, but only temporarily. - Dan Seligman

I'll have a "Cafe Mocha Vodka Valium Latte" to go, please. - Unknown

You can lead a horse to water but I'd rather ride it to the liquor store. - Wayne Nowazek

I imagine hell like this: Italian punctuality, German humour and English wine. - Peter Ustinov

Whiskey is by far the most popular of all remedies that won't cure a cold. - Jerry Vale

One of the disadvantages of wine is that it makes a man mistake words for thoughts. - Samuel Johnson

Logic, like whiskey, loses its beneficial effect when taken in too large quantities. - Lord Dunsany

You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar. - Groucho Marx

I love to sing, and I love to drink scotch. Most people would rather hear me drink scotch. - George Burns

My heart says chocolate and wine but my jeans say, for the love of God women, eat a salad. - Unknown

I exercise extreme self control. I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast. - WC Fields

An Irishman after trying American beer for the first time: "Put it back in the horse!" - Unknown

Great people talk about ideas, average people talk about things, and small people talk about wine. - Fran Lebowitz

I'm making wine at home, but I'm making it out of raisins so it will be aged automatically. - Steven Wright

If you have to choose between drinking wine every day or being skinny, which would you choose: Red or White? - Unknown

Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat. - Alex Levine

There is more refreshment and stimulation in a nap, even of the briefest, than in all the alcohol ever distilled. - Ovid

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. - George Carlin

We have embarked upon the world's largest and longest cocktail party, and every issue imaginable is up for grabs. - Geoffrey Moore

You pretty much can't get away from bacon or whiskey in the South. Put a doughnut in it and you'd be good to go. - Hillary Scott

It was so quiet, a reservation kind of quiet, where you can hear somebody drinking whiskey on the rocks three miles away. - Sherman Alexie

I have made an important discovery - that alcohol, taken in sufficient quantities, produces all the effects of intoxication. - Oscar Wilde

Not all chemicals are bad. Without hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. - Dave Barry

Irish whiskey was first developed for its medicinal benefits. It's just lucky for the rest of us that the Irish are such a sickly bunch. - Unknown

When I have an idea, I turn down the flame, as if it were a little alcohol stove, as low as it will go. Then it explodes and that is my idea. - Ernest Hemingway


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