#1 humor site on the 'net

Police Gone Bananas

Career diversity in Italy is quite a-peal-ing

Police Gone Bananas thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

Snacks go hand in hand for an Italian Policeman

QuotaBills
Make crime pay. Become a lawyer. - Will Rogers

All people look better under arrest. - John Waters

Crime does not pay as well as politics. - Alfred E. Newman

Behind every great fortune there is a crime. - Honore de Balzac

Poverty is the parent of revolution and crime. - Aristotle

Obviously crime pays, or there'd be no crime. - G. Gordon Liddy

Is it a bigger crime to rob a bank or to open one? - Ted Allan

The police must obey the law while enforcing the law. - Earl Warren

All mothers have intuition. The great ones have radar. - Cathy Guisewite

Stop crime at its source - support planned parenthood. - Robert Byrne

The adjective is the banana peel of the parts of speech. - Clifton Fadiman

I think crime pays. The hours are good, and you travel a lot. - Woody Allen

Rape is the only crime in which the victim becomes the accused. - Freda Adler

Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children. - George Bernard Shaw

The best car safety device is a rear-view mirror with a cop in it. - Dudley Moore

My loathings are simple: stupidity, oppression, crime, cruelty, soft music. - Vladimir Nabokov

I wanted a man who wouldn't stray so I'm dating a guy on house arrest. - Kim Bove

Outside of the killings, D.C. has one of the lowest crime rates in the country. - Marion Barry

I am kind of paranoid in reverse. I suspect people of plotting to make me happy. - J.D. Salinger

If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent? - George Carlin

Never think that war, no matter how necessary, nor how justified, is not a crime. - Ernest Hemingway

It's a proven fact that capital punishment is a well-known detergent to crime. - Archie Bunker

The only medicine for suffering, crime, and all the other woes of mankind, is wisdom. - Thomas Huxley

I took a physical for some life insurance. All they would give me was fire and theft. - Milton Berle

Blind commitment to a theory is not an intellectual virtue: it is an intellectual crime. - Imre Lakatos

I'm the only woman who can walk in Central Park at night... and reduce the crime rate. - Phyllis Diller

The old believe everything, the middle-aged suspect everything, the young know everything. - Oscar Wilde

If crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight? - George Carlin

We don't seem to be able to check crime, so why not legalize it and then tax it out of business. - Will Rogers

My wife is on a diet. Coconuts and bananas. She hasn't lost any weight, but she can sure climb a tree. - Henny Youngman

My mother always used to say, "The older you get, the better you get. Unless you're a banana." - Betty White

Women are like the police. They could have all the evidence in the world, but they still want the confession. - Chris Rock

A benefit of any job is laughter. It should never be a crime to have fun on the job. It may be a crime not to. - Terry Paulson

The crime problem in New York is getting really serious. The other day the Statue of Liberty had both hands up. - Jay Leno

They're picking bananas in Brazil and them Indians down there, they don't care about what you look like. - Archie Bunker

For all of the fights I have had in my life, both on and off the ice, I have only been in the back of a cop car once. - Tie Domi

Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
So just what are time flies, and why do they fly like an arrow? - Groucho Marx

When I was a kid, one cop could have taken care of the whole neighborhood. Now, one cop wouldn't be safe in the neighborhood. - Mike Royko

Homosexuality in Russia is a crime and the punishment is seven years in prison, locked up with the other men. There is a three year waiting list. - Yakov Smirnoff

One of the fondest expressions around is that we can't be the world's policeman. But guess who gets called when suddenly someone needs a cop. - General Colin Powell


Flower Frame Heels

I'll Be Right There

Frankfurt Subway Entrance

Winter Deflation

Baby Papaya Crossing

Cat Tofu

Dad Sandwich

The Untangler

Glendambo Welcome

Leaning Tower Of Pisa Dog

Slim People Bathroom

Soothing Hairstyle

Truck Driver Birth

Spider Trap

Nice Day For A Ride

Motion Picture Selfie

Winter Mirror

Is This Really Happening?!

House 'Broke'rage

2019 Hooters Owl & Birds of Prey Calendars (3)

Restaurant Valentines

Cute Puppy

Unhappy Valentine's Day

My Favourite Day of the Year