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Garbage Day Special Delivery

The Practical Joe-ker guide on how to liven up garbage day

Garbage Day Special Delivery thanks to Emery Pettigrove

Endorsed by the Al Capone school of victim services

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A quiet fool is half a sage. - Yiddish Proverb

Only a fool knows everything. - Maasai Proverb

Architects are practical poets. - Unknown

The secret to humor is surprise. - Aristotle

Why did I wake up in a garbage can? - Nicole Polizzi

Arguing with a fool proves there are two. - Doris M. Smith

A jester unemployed is nobody's fool. - Danny Kaye

Expect nothing. Live frugally on surprise. - Alice Walker

Foolish indeed are those who trust to fortune. - Lady Murasaki

Talk sense to a fool and he calls you foolish. - Euripides

Practical politics consists in ignoring facts. - Henry Brooks Adams

Sometimes I drink water just to surprise my liver. - WC Fields

The wise person questions himself, the fool others. - Henri Arnold

A genius from nine to five - a fool at the weekends. - Unknown

Before God we are all equally wise - and equally foolish. - Albert Einstein

It is a profitable thing, if one is wise, to seem foolish. - Aeschylus

First love is only a little foolishness and a lot of curiosity. - George Bernard Shaw

Illusion is the dust the devil throws in the eyes of the foolish. - Minna Antrim

Failure is unimportant. It takes courage to make a fool of yourself. - Charlie Chaplin

If a million people say a foolish thing, it is still a foolish thing. - Anatole France

He who breaks a resolution is a weakling. He who makes one is a fool. - F.M. Knowles

Clean and nourish your mind every day. It can easily become a garbage bin. - Unknown

A fool thinks himself to be wise, but a wise man knows himself to be a fool. - William Shakespeare

Idealism, alas, does not protect one from ignorance, dogmatism, and foolishness. - Sidney Hook

The heart of a fool is in his mouth, but the mouth of a wise man is in his heart. - Benjamin Franklin

The foolish man seeks happiness in the distance. The wise grows it under his feet. - James Oppenheim

In California, they don't throw their garbage away - they make it into TV shows. - Woody Allen

He who asks is a fool for five minutes, but he who does not ask remains a fool forever. - Chinese Proverb

The only fool bigger than the person who knows it all is the person who argues with him. - Stanislaw Jerszy Lec

The young man who has not wept is a savage, and the old man who will not laugh is a fool. - George Santayana

I've been married to a communist and a fascist, and neither would take out the garbage. - Zsa Zsa Gabor

Mix a little foolishness with your serious plans. It is lovely to be silly at the right moment. - Horace

A little government and a little luck are necessary in life, but only a fool trusts either of them. - P.J. O'Rourke

Start a huge, foolish project like Noah. It makes absolutely no difference what people think of you. - Rumi

Fang can't stand to see trash & garbage lying around the house. He can't stand the competition. - Phyllis Diller

Never tell people how to do things. Tell them what to do and they will surprise you with their ingenuity. - George S Patton

It is better to remain silent at the risk of being thought a fool, than to talk and remove all doubt of it. - Maurice Switzer

You can always tell a real friend: when you make a fool of yourself, he doesn't feel you've done a permanent job. - Laurence Peter

The greatest advantage I know of being thought a wit by the world is that it gives one the greater freedom of playing the fool. - Jonathan Swift

Thirteen roadways lead through life
To thirteen doors of death,
Homeward from foolish fears and strife
We float on failing breath. - Tao


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