#1 humor site on the 'net

Escalator Performance

Cautious escalator takes acting lessons

Escalator Performance thanks to Jim Serritella

A moving staircase that doesn't move

QuotaBills
Just let the wardrobe do the acting. - Jack Nicholson

How prone to doubt, how cautious are the wise! - Homer

Acting is everybody's favorite second job. - Jack Nicholson

Acting is like a Halloween mask that you put on. - River Phoenix

Caution is not cowardice; even the ants march armed. - Uganda

An acre of performance is worth a world of promises. - Red Auerbach

When your image improves, your performance improves. - Zig Ziglar

Acting is standing up naked and turning around slowly. - Rosalind Russell

Acting is just a way of making a living; the family is life. - Denzel Washington

I have learned to use the word impossible with the greatest caution. - Wernher von Braun

We promise according to our hopes and perform according to our fears. - Fran├žois de La Rochefoucauld

I know very little about acting. I'm just an incredibly gifted faker. - Robert Downey Jr.

Marriage requires a special talent like acting. Monogamy requires genius. - Warren Beatty

You cannot perform in a manner inconsistent with the way you see yourself. - Zig Ziglar

Acting is merely the art of keeping a large group of people from coughing. - Ralph Richardson

Bravery is the capacity to perform properly even when scared half to death. - Omar Brailey

Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase. - Martin Luther King, Jr.

If you don't see yourself as a winner, then you cannot perform as a winner. - Zig Ziglar

My friend Sam has one leg. I went to his house. I couldn't go up the stairs. - Steven Wright

Of all forms of caution, caution in love is perhaps the most fatal to true happiness. - Bertrand Russell

The principal benefit acting has afforded me is the money to pay for my psychoanalysis. - Marlon Brando

Faith goes up the stairs that love has built and looks out the window which hope has opened. - Charles Spurgeon

A habit cannot be tossed out the window. It must be coaxed down the stairs a step at a time. - Mark Twain

Great acting is being able to create a character. Great character is being able to be yourself. - John Leguizamo

The elevator to success is out of order. You'll have to use the stairs... one step at a time. - Joe Girard

Take the first step in faith. You don't have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step. - Martin Luther King, Jr.

The only way you can sustain a permanent change is to create a new way of thinking, acting, and being. - Jennifer Hudson

On the stage he was natural, simple, affecting;
T'was only that when he was off he was acting. - Oliver Godsmith

If you're willing to do today what others won't, you can perform tomorrow like others can't. - Jim Brogan

The Irish Catholic side was married to the life of an actor and I found out acting could be a form of prayer. - Liam Neeson

I'm acting when I serve as a hostess, when I run my wig business. I was born to act, and life itself is the greatest part. - Eva Gabor

Acting childish seems to come naturally, but acting like an adult, no matter how old we are, just doesn't come easy to us. - Lily Tomlin

Self-consciousness is the enemy of all art, be it acting, writing, painting, or living itself, which is the greatest art of all. - Ray Bradbury

God moves in a mysterious way
His wonders to perform;
He plants His footsteps in the sea
And rides upon the storm. - William Cowper

If anyone has conducted a Beethoven performance, and then doesn't have to go to an osteopath, then there's something wrong. - Simon Rattle

If I advocate cautious optimism it is not because I do not have faith in the future but because I do not want to encourage blind faith. - Aung San Suu Kyi

At fifty, the madwoman in the attic breaks loose, stomps down the stairs, and sets fire to the house. She won't be imprisoned anymore. - Erica Jong

I'm building a glass pyramid over the Egyptian escalator where my body will be mummified, so my customers can come and see me forever. - Mohamed Al-Fayed

A man who is used to acting in one way never changes; he must come to ruin when the times, in changing, no longer are in harmony with his ways. - Niccolo Machiavelli

We are given one life, and the decision is ours whether to wait for circumstances to make up our mind, or whether to act, and in acting, to live. - Omar Nelson Bradley


Dragon Buoy

Wi-Fi Password

When You Gotta Go

Bird Melons

Black Golfer

Gated Community

Piano Shelves

Page Lurker

Swimsuit Police

Aussie Shopping Cart

LabraThor Retriever

Local Crabs

ThrowYo

Hair Plants

Ruined Day

Classic Ballet Ad

Tea Party Weapon

Reading Talent

ParaPlane Ride

iArm

Instant Engine Starting Down Under

Shakespeare Pens

Car-nage

Drum Kit Chandelier