#1 humor site on the 'net

Car Seat Painting

Upholstery repair for car seat covers

Car Seat Painting thanks to Mike King

Bubba experiments with new car upholstery fabric

QuotaBills
The painting has a life of its own. - Jackson Pollock

I want to paint the way a bird sings. - Claude Monet

Keep the paint up, and the rubber down. - Unknown

Life is painting a picture, not doing a sum. - Oliver Wendell Holmes

What is this, an audience or an oil painting? - Milton Berle

Every time I paint a portrait I lose a friend. - John Singer Sargent

A brush of kindness can paint a smile on a face. - Robert M. Hensel

The only time I feel alive is when I'm painting. - Andy Warhol

The time to repair the roof is when the sun is shining. - John F Kennedy

If I could say it in words there would be no reason to paint. - Edward Hopper

It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men. - Frederick Douglass

The shortest distance between two points is usually under repair. - Unknown

It's a small world, but I wouldn't want to have to paint it. - Steven Wright

A painting is never finished — it simply stops in interesting places. - Paul Gardner

You should not paint the chair, but only what someone has felt about it. - Edvard Munch

Out of suffering comes creativity. You cannot spell painting without pain. - John Lithgow

Any fool can paint a picture, but it takes a wise man to be able to sell it. - Samuel Butler

Life is a great big canvas, and you should throw all the paint on it you can. - Danny Kaye

Keep your bike in good repair: motorcycle boots are not comfortable for walking. - Unknown

As a child, I always chose a false nose and some face paint and a wig for my birthday. - Ashley Jensen

It's easier to build up a child than it is to repair an adult. Choose your words wisely. - Unknown

My mechanic told me, "I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder." - Steven Wright

It's not your painting anymore. It stopped being your painting the moment that you finished it. - Jeff Melvoin

There's nothing to match curling up with a good book when there's a repair job to be done around the house. - Joe Ryan

The minute there's a map, there is no art. Paint by numbers is not art. Paint by numbers is a mechanical activity. - Seth Godin

If you hear a voice within you say "you cannot paint," then by all means paint and that voice will be silenced. - Vincent Van Gogh

If there be a God, I think that what he would like me to do is paint as much of the map of Africa British red as possible. - Cecil Rhodes

I challenge you to make your life the masterpiece you want to paint, the novel you want to read, the day you want to wake to. - Toni Sorenson

Self-consciousness is the enemy of all art, be it acting, writing, painting, or living itself, which is the greatest art of all. - Ray Bradbury

When it began, cubism was a sort of analysis, which was no more painting than the description of physical phenomena was physics. - Juan Gris

Deals are my art form. Other people paint beautifully on canvas or write wonderful poetry. I like making deals, preferably big deals. - Donald Trump

Painting is a blind man's profession. He paints not what he sees, but what he feels, what he tells himself about what he has seen. - Pablo Picasso

It was any outcast's nightmare. If I looked carefully, I suspected I might find it beneath the black paint of the small acrylic by the window. - Nancy Werlin

I went to the hardware store and bought some used paint. It was in the shape of a house. I also bought some batteries, but they weren't included. - Steven Wright


Wet T-Shirt Contest Winners

Cheating Husband

Stuck On High Gear

Bottom Blast Car Wash

Yo Mama Bin Shopping

Gangsta

Helmet Full Of Hair

Air Conditioner Repair

Redneck Towing

Walking His Fresh Food Pet

Japanese Tea Bath

Redneck Daycare

Hedge Hunter

Pilot Prop Job

Front To Side View

Moses' USB Tablets

Family Photo

Is Laughter The Best Medicine?

Plastered Wall Plasterer

Waffle Board

Stairway Repair

Cowboy Bubble Bath

Trunk Load

Centennial Puff