#1 humor site on the 'net

Big Hands Baby

Growing up to his full potential a little too early

Big Hands Baby thanks to Heather Pulfer

Little Johnny was born a natural comedian

QuotaBills
Childhood is a wilderness. - Aspen Matis

Adults are just obsolete children. - Dr. Seuss

Lawyers, I suppose, were children once. - Charles Lamb

Old men are children for a second time. - Aristophanes

Time is a game played beautifully by children. - Heraclitus

Raising kids is part joy and part guerrilla warfare. - Ed Asner

With kids, the days are long, but the years are short. - John Leguizamo

The childhood shows the man, as morning shows the day. - John Milton

Your children need your presence more than your presents. - Jesse Jackson

Children need love, especially when they do not deserve it. - Harold Hulbert

There are two kinds of cruises - pleasure and with children. - George Burns

A child seldom needs a good talking to as a good listening to. - Robert Brault

As long as you know men are like children, you know everything. - Coco Chanel

We've had bad luck with our kids - they've all grown up. - Christopher Morley

As a child, the only clear thought I had was "Get candy." - Jerry Seinfeld

Our separation from each other is an optical illusion of consciousness. - Albert Einstein

My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor. - Phyllis Diller

The most important thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother. - Henry Ward Beecher

Children need the freedom and time to play. Play is not a luxury. Play is a necessity. - Kay R. Jamison

Free will is an illusion. People always choose the perceived path of greatest pleasure. - Scott Adams

The most effective kind of education is that a child should play amongst lovely things. - Plato

Oh, what a tangled web do parents weave
when they think that their children are naive. - Ogden Nash

When I was a child, I wanted to raise horses in Wyoming or be a cabin boy on a pirate ship. - Sadie Jones

Don't worry that your children never listen to you; worry that they are always watching you. - Robert Fulghum

I brought children into this dark world because it needed the light that only a child can bring. - Liz Armbruster

Success is the good fortune that comes from aspiration, desperation, perspiration and inspiration. - Evan Esar

When it comes to raising children, I believe in give and take. I give orders and they take ‘em. - Bernie Mac

It is an act of love to say, "I believe in you as my child, and you don't need my help." - Peter Buffett

Our children may learn about heroes of the past. Our task is to make ourselves architects of the future. - Jomo Mzee Kenyatta

A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an occasional animal, and the common cold. - Ogden Nash

Children raced outside. She surveyed their trail - traces of sticky fingerprints across everything, like wee poems. - Dr. SunWolf

I am afraid we must make the world honest before we can honestly say to our children that honesty is the best policy. - George Bernard Shaw

There's nothing that can help you understand your beliefs more than trying to explain them to an inquisitive child. - Frank A. Clark

You know your kids are growing up when they stop asking you where they came from and refuse to tell you where they're going. - P.J. O'Rourke

My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide whether to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives. - Rita Rudner

Everything here is edible; even I'm edible. But that, dear children, is cannibalism, and is in fact frowned upon in most societies. - Johnny Depp

It is not what you do for your children, but what you have taught them to do for themselves, that will make them successful human beings. - Ann Landers

I think, at a child's birth, if a mother could ask a fairy godmother to endow it with the most useful gift, that gift should be curiosity. - Eleanor Roosevelt

If you never want to see a man again, just tell him, "I love you. I want to marry you. I want to have children." They leave skid marks. - Rita Rudner

Rather than pushing children to think like adults, we might do better to remember that they are great learners and to try harder to be more like them. - Seymour Papert


Patio Losers

How To Argue With A Woman

Wings Fans Are Ruthless

Temple Car

Netherlands Parking Lot

Model T Snowmobile

Tulip Snowpath

New Audi

Tower of Hammocks

Family Birthday Reminder

Dead Batteries

Ostrich Bush

Tetris Cake

T-Rex Shadow

Ordnance Table

Wine Bibber

Redneck Wireless Selfie

Tylenol Ban

GoosePrints

Louisiana Potholes

Cheers!

Billy Goat Gruff

Girlfriend Math

Coffee Days