#1 humor site on the 'net

Room For Two

Clearing out the toys to make way for a good friend

Room For Two thanks to Mike King

The cat's in the bag

QuotaBills
Old friends are best. - John Selden

Curiosity killed the cat. - English Proverb

True friends stab you in the front. - Oscar Wilde

Babies are such a nice way to start people. - Don Herold

Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer. - Michael Corleone

A baby is God's opinion that the world should go on. - Carl Sandburg

Do I not destroy my enemies when I make them my friends? - Abraham Lincoln

If you want an accounting of your worth, count your friends. - Merry Browne

If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends? - Steven Wright

You shall judge a man by his foes as well as by his friends. - Joseph Conrad

Tell me who your friends are and I will tell you who you are. - Russian Proverb

People that hate cats will come back as mice in their next life. - Faith Resnick

A countryman between two lawyers is like a fish between two cats. - Benjamin Franklin

In prosperity our friends know us; in adversity we know our friends. - J. Churton Collins

Insomnia: a contagious disease often transmitted from babies to parents. - Shannon Fife

Good friends are hard to find, harder to leave, and impossible to forget. - Unknown

When rats infest the palace, a lame cat is better than the swiftest horse. - Chinese Proverb

Next to acquiring good friends, the best acquisition is that of good books. - Charles Caleb Colton

Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you. - Mary Bly

Wishing to be friends is quick work, but friendship is a slow ripening fruit. - Aristotle

If you hold a cat by the tail you learn things you cannot learn any other way. - Mark Twain

The main difference between a cat and a lie is that a cat only has nine lives. - Mark Twain

We make our friends. We make our enemies. But God makes our next-door neighbour. - G K Chesterton

Friends are those rare people who ask how we are and then wait to hear the answer. - Ed Cunningham

The only time a woman wishes she were a year older is when she is expecting a baby. - Mary Marsh

Sleep is like my cat. I can call him by his name, but he still won't come to me. - Shane Koyczan

In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends. - Martin Luther King Jr.

Never make excuses. Your friends don't need them and your foes won't believe them. - John Wooden

We cherish our friends not for their ability to amuse us, but for our ability to amuse them. - Evelyn Waugh

When I go home, I play with my baby dolls and strollers and diaper bags, and play with my sisters. - Dakota Fanning

The baby bat
Screamed out in fright,
'Turn on the dark,
I'm afraid of the light.' - Shel Silverstein

As yet, Bernard Shaw hasn't become prominent enough to have any enemies, but none of his friends like him. - Oscar Wilde

Your friends will know you better in the first moment you meet than your acquaintances will know you in a lifetime. - Richard Bach

The best reason for a knitter to marry is that you can't teach the cat to be impressed when you finish a lace scarf. - Stephanie Pearl-McPhee

I like thieves. Some of my best friends are thieves. Why, just last week we had the president of the bank over for dinner. - WC Fields

You end up as you deserve. In old age you must put up with the face, the friends, the health, and the children you have earned. - Fay Weldon

As we grow up we think we lose our friends. But the truth is that we don't lose friends, we just learn who the real ones are. - Unknown

I put contact lenses in my dog's eyes. They had little pictures of cats on them. Then I took one out and he ran around in circles. - Steven Wright

My candle burns at both ends,
It will not last the night;
But ah, my foes, and oh, my friends -
It gives a lovely light! - Edna St Vincent Millay

If animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much. - Mark Twain


Trouser Iron

Bathroom Choices

Free Paper Strips

Redneck Bass Tape Measure

Bath Head Protection

Ivy Facade

Wet T-Shirt Contest Winners

Cheating Husband

Stuck On High Gear

Bottom Blast Car Wash

Yo Mama Bin Shopping

Gangsta

Helmet Full Of Hair

Air Conditioner Repair

Redneck Towing

Walking His Fresh Food Pet

Japanese Tea Bath

Redneck Daycare

Hedge Hunter

Pilot Prop Job

Front To Side View

Moses' USB Tablets

Family Photo

Is Laughter The Best Medicine?