QuotaBillsEvery dog has his day. - Unknown
Baby lying in the bassinoot. - Archie Bunker
The dog is the god of frolic. - Henry Ward Beecher
A hard dog to keep on the porch. - Hillary Clinton
A bambiraptor is a savage baby dear. - Alan Davies
A dog has the soul of a philosopher. - Plato
I am I because my little dog knows me. - Gertrude Stein
The view only changes for the lead dog. - Norman O. Brown
A dog in desperation will leap over a wall. - Unknown
You can't teach a young dog old tricks. - Warren Buffet
If you want a friend in Washington, get a dog. - Harry S Truman
Don't think to hunt two hares with one dog. - Benjamin Franklin
A baby is an inestimable blessing and a bother. - Mark Twain
Ever notice how baby shampoo smells like spring? - Toni Sorenson
I love a dog. He does nothing for political reasons. - Will Rogers
I spilled spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone. - Steven Wright
Anybody who hates dogs and babies can't be all bad. - Leo Rosten
A baby is God's opinion that the world should go on. - Carl Sandburg
You take more pictures of your baby than NASA does of Mars. - Unknown
My wife's such a bad cook, the dog begs for Alka-Seltzer. - Rodney Dangerfield
I've been on so many blind dates, I should get a free dog. - Wendy Liebman
A baby is born with a need to be loved - and never outgrows it. - Frank A. Clark
Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called "Ego". - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche
When a man's best friend is his dog, that dog has a problem. - Edward Abbey
Dogs are getting bigger, according to a leading dog manufacturer. - Leo Rosten
Only a biker knows why a dog sticks his head out of a car window. - Unknown
People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. - Leo J Burke
A dog is a man's best friend. A cat is a cat's best friend. - Robert J Vogel
Having a baby is like trying to push a grand piano through a transom. - Alice Roosevelt Longworth
I had rather hear my dog bark at a crow, than a man swear he loves me. - William Shakespeare
Anybody who doesn't know what soap tastes like never washed a dog. - Franklin P Jones
The big lesson in life, baby, is never be scared of anyone or anything. - Frank Sinatra
The last thing my kids ever did to earn money was lose their baby teeth. - Phyllis Diller
Insomnia: a contagious disease often transmitted from babies to parents. - Shannon Fife
Back then the women had babies, which they called in them days, begatten. - Archie Bunker
To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs. - Aldous Huxley
Baby: a loud noise at one end and no sense of responsibility at the other. - Ronald Knox
Why can't a woman be more like a dog, huh? So sweet, loving, attentive. - Kirk Douglas
A dog is the only thing on this earth that loves you more than he loves himself. - Josh Billings
The only time a woman really succeeds in changing a man is when he's a baby. - Natalie Wood
Having a baby is like falling in love again, both with your husband and your child. - Tina Brown
The only time a woman wishes she were a year older is when she is expecting a baby. - Mary Marsh
An ugly baby is a very nasty object, and the prettiest is frightful when undressed. - Queen Victoria
The firsts go away - first love, first baby, first kiss. You have to create new ones. - Sarah Jessica Parker
Life is like a dogsled team. If you ain't the lead dog, the scenery never changes. - Lewis Grizzard
If newborn babies could speak they would be the most intelligent beings on planet earth. - Jaden Smith
It's not the size of the dog in the fight - it's the size of the fight in the dog. - Mark Twain
I love working in Canada. The ovation is great. It makes me feel like I'm the top dog. - Owen Hart
Get a good idea and stay with it. Dog it, and work at it until it's done, and done right. - Walt Disney
A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down. - Robert Benchley
Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend.
Inside of a dog it's too dark to read. - Groucho Marx
When I go home, I play with my baby dolls and strollers and diaper bags, and play with my sisters. - Dakota Fanning
I'm beginning to have morning sickness. I'm not having a baby, I'm just sick of morning. - Phyllis Diller
What a pity Hell's gates are not kept by O'Flynn
The surly old dog would let nobody in. - Patrick Ireland
If you don't want your dog to have bad breath, do what I do: pour a little Lavoris in the toilet. - Jay Leno
For us in Russia, communism is a dead dog, while, for many people in the West, it is still a living lion. - Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn
It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass! - Rodney Dangerfield
This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold of a hammer. - Will Rogers
The baby bat
Screamed out in fright,
'Turn on the dark,
I'm afraid of the light.' - Shel Silverstein
If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around. - Unknown
My illness is due to my doctor's insistence that I drink milk, a whitish fluid they force down helpless babies. - WC Fields
Sensitive love letters are my specialty: "Dear Baby, Welcome to Dumpsville. Population: You. P.S. I'm gay." - Homer Simpson
We've begun to long for the pitter-patter of little feet, so we bought a dog. It's cheaper and you get more feet. - Rita Rudner
An actor is never so great as when he reminds you of an animal - falling like a cat, lying like a dog, moving like a fox. - Francois Truffaut
I still play hockey every now and then, and I still golf. But my biggest exercise is walking my big dog in the park every day. - Michael J. Fox
No one ever wants to see his or her name linked to anything bad. Conscience is like a baby. It has to go to sleep before you can. - Harvey Mackay
I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks? - George Carlin
If animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much. - Mark Twain
Among God's creatures two, the dog and the guitar, have taken all the sizes and all the shapes, in order not to be separated from the man. - Andres Segovia
Our babies are like penguins; penguin babies can't exist unless more than one person is taking care of them. They just can't keep going. - Alison Gopnik