#1 humor site on the 'net

Oil Lamps

Lighting the way for a clean-energy environment

Oil Lamps thanks to Wayne Nowazek

How Bubba recycles his light bulbs

QuotaBills
Electrical degenerators - Archie Bunker

A light heart lives long. - William Shakespeare

Many hands make light work. - English Proverb

Formula for success: rise early, work hard, strike oil. - J Paul Getty

It is better to light one candle than to curse the darkness. - Chinese Proverb

I merely took the energy it takes to pout and wrote some blues. - Duke Ellington

I love the spirit of Halloween and the energy that comes with it. - Katharine McPhee

Faith is the bird that feels the light when the dawn is still dark. - Rabindranath Tagore

May it be a light to you in dark places, when all other lights go out. - JRR Tolkien

If I could light my own farts I could fly to the moon or at least Uranus. - Robin Williams

Advice is like castor oil, easy enough to give but dreadful uneasy to take. - Josh Billings

Without passion you don't have energy, without energy you have nothing. - Donald Trump

Energy, like the Biblical grain of the mustard seed, will remove mountains. - Hosea Ballou

Walking with a friend in the dark is better than walking alone in the light. - Helen Keller

May you have warmth in your igloo, oil in your lamp, and peace in your heart. - Eskimo Proverb

And all we feared inside the night / shows true in morning's biased light. - Garth von Buchholz

Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal. - Albert Camus

Chains of habit are too light to be felt until they are too heavy to be broken. - Warren Buffet

If it weren't for electricity, we'd all be watching television by candlelight. - George Gobel

Death is not extinguishing the light; it is putting out the lamp because dawn has come. - Rabindranath Tagore

Bound by paperwork, short on hands, sleep, and energy... nurses are rarely short on caring. - Sharon Hudacek

Life engenders life. Energy creates energy. It is by spending oneself that one becomes rich. - Sarah Bernhardt

I've got more energy now than when I was younger because I know exactly what I want to do. - George Balanchine

We have been too long in darkness. Once already we have been in the light, and we want it again. - Alexander Dubcek

Often statistics are used as a drunken man uses lamp posts… for support rather than illumination. - Andrew Lang

Fathers are like a lighthouse - when there is fog his children can always depend on seeing the light. - Unknown

I am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at the state prison. - WC Fields

We - we need strength, we need energy, we need quickness and we need brain in this country to turn it around. - Donald Trump

I think that most people would rather face the light of a real enemy than the darkness of their imagined fears. - Max Brooks

Milton's style was exactly right for what he did. He had enormous energy. Enormous vitality. He still does. - Steve Allen

We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light. - Plato

The reason gas prices are so high is because the oil is in Texas and Oklahoma and all the dipsticks are in Washington. - Yakov Smirnoff

It is impossible to travel faster than the speed of light, and certainly not desirable, as one's hat keeps blowing off. - Woody Allen

The fundamental concept in social science is Power, in the same sense in which Energy is the fundamental concept in physics. - Bertrand Russell

Direct your energy toward achieving a goal, and tackle the problems with an emphasis on edging closer to a successful result. - Harvey Mackay

Disability is a way of getting some extremity, some kind of very difficult situation, that throws an interesting light on people. - Mark Haddon

If I were a flower,
humming bird would be my favourite bee
And If I were blind,
the light of darkness I'd love to see - Munia Khan

Distinguished ancestors shed a powerful light on their descendants, and forbid the concealment either of their merits or of their demerits. - Gaius S. Crispus

To be a star, you must shine your own light, follow your path, and don't worry about the darkness, for that is when the stars shine brightest. - Joe-kster

And God said, 'Let there be light' and there was light, but the Electricity Board said He would have to wait until Thursday to be connected. - Spike Milligan


The No Brainer

Truck Bender

Bacon Balls

Fast Closure

Ukrainian Feast

1934 Modern Home

Fliptus

Copper Tubing Specialist

Bach Off Van

Boss Resume

Canadian Gun Shop

Hogwart's Other Bridge

Excalibutter

As The World Turns

Bird Condo

Legal Assistance For All

Chinese Law School

Do Not Stack

Stairway Chute

Walkway Not

Pirate Vacation

How Not To Prop Start Your Plane

Redneck Spaghetti

Wild Game Nutrition Guide