#1 humor site on the 'net

How Babies Are Made In Canada

Useful corner gas stations air supply

How Babies Are Made In Canada thanks to Barry McCartney

Air today... gone tomorrow (at least in 9 months time)

How Babies Are Made In Canada thanks to Barry McCartney

How Babies Are Made In Canada thanks to Barry McCartney

How Babies Are Made In Canada thanks to Barry McCartney

How Babies Are Made In Canada thanks to Barry McCartney

How Babies Are Made In Canada thanks to Barry McCartney

How Babies Are Made In Canada thanks to Barry McCartney

QuotaBills
A child is a curly dimpled lunatic. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

A baby is an inestimable blessing and a bother. - Mark Twain

A rich child often sits in a poor mother's lap. - Danish Proverb

A baby is God's opinion that the world should go on. - Carl Sandburg

Every baby born into the world is a finer one than the last. - Charles Dickens

Love is the child of illusion and the parent of disillusion. - Miguel de Unamuno

If pregnancy were a book, they would cut the last two chapters. - Nora Ephron

One year they wanted to make me poster boy - for birth control. - Rodney Dangerfield

If you can give your child only one gift, let it be enthusiasm. - Bruce Barton

Never help a child with a task at which he feels he can succeed. - Maria Montessori

Ask your child what he wants for dinner only if he's buying. - Fran Lebowitz

Neither fire nor wind, birth nor death can erase our good deeds. - Buddha

When I was a child, nobody died; but now it happens all the time. - Unknown

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. - Leo J Burke

My Birth Certificate is so old, it's written in Roman Numerals. - Bill Carter

A very small degree of hope is sufficient to cause the birth of love. - Stendhal

It is spring again. The earth is like a child that knows poems by heart. - Rainer M. Rilke

Insomnia: a contagious disease often transmitted from babies to parents. - Shannon Fife

There's only one pretty child in the world, and every mother has it. - English Proverb

Anyone who thinks the art of conversation is dead ought to tell a child to go to bed. - Robert Gallagher

There are no seven wonders of the world in the eyes of a child. There are seven million. - Walt Streightiff

People always ask me, "Were you funny as a child?" Well, no, I was an accountant. - Ellen DeGeneres

I am the indoctrinated child of two lapsed Irish Catholics. Which is to say: I am not religious. - Meghan O'Rourke

When I go home, I play with my baby dolls and strollers and diaper bags, and play with my sisters. - Dakota Fanning

I'm beginning to have morning sickness. I'm not having a baby, I'm just sick of morning. - Phyllis Diller

I was such an ugly baby. My mother never breast fed me. She told me that she only liked me as a friend. - Rodney Dangerfield

As a child, I was subjected to a lot of spaghetti Westerns and hated them. I wanted the Indians to win. - Kara Walker

The baby bat
Screamed out in fright,
'Turn on the dark,
I'm afraid of the light.' - Shel Silverstein

The only way we can ever teach a child to say "I'm sorry" is for him to hear it from our lips first. - Kevin Leman

My illness is due to my doctor's insistence that I drink milk, a whitish fluid they force down helpless babies. - WC Fields

Let early education be a sort of amusement; you will then better be able to find out the natural bent of the child. - Plato

We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light. - Plato

Spare the rod and spoil the child - that is true. But, beside the rod, keep an apple to give him when he has done well. - Martin Luther

You can be childlike without being childish. A child always wants to have fun. Ask yourself, 'Am I having fun?' - Christopher Meloni

Children are smarter than any of us. Know how I know that? I don't know one child with a full time job and children. - Bill Hicks

Babies are bits of stardust, blown from the hand of God. Lucky the woman who knows the pangs of birth, for she has held a star. - Larry Barratto

Life is a child playing around your feet, a tool you hold firmly in your grip, a bench you sit down upon in the evening, in your garden. - Jean Anouilh

Religion is something left over from the infancy of our intelligence, it will fade away as we adopt reason and science as our guidelines. - Bertrand Russell

I think, at a child's birth, if a mother could ask a fairy godmother to endow it with the most useful gift, that gift should be curiosity. - Eleanor Roosevelt

Our babies are like penguins; penguin babies can't exist unless more than one person is taking care of them. They just can't keep going. - Alison Gopnik


Don't Get Your Head In A Knot

Cornfield Fishing

Dawn Gone

Highest Human Position In The World

Together Since

You Never Call

CLUMSY Driver

Water Short

Post Research

Motorcycle Taxi

Columbia Street Party

Fly By Meal

Down Day

Hanging Out With Friends

You Want Me To Do What?

Mirror Lake

Kitchen Thing

Light Road

Coffee Spoon

Show Stopper

Water Judge

Litter of DalCations

Fitness On The Bus

Deluxe Peanut Butter Jam Sandwich