QuotaBillsPhysician, heal thyself. - Luke 4:23
Laughter is the best medicine. - the Joe-kster
I think I can wipe out diabetes. - Robert Atkins
Time is generally the best doctor. - Ovid
I'm so mean, I make medicine sick. - Muhammad Ali
Surgery is the cry of defeat in medicine. - Martin H. Fischer
God heals, and the doctor takes the fees. - Benjamin Franklin
The best doctor gives the least medicines. - Benjamin Franklin
Nurses are the hospitality of the hospital. - Carrie Latet
When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick. - George Burns
God is a concept by which we measure our pain. - John Lennon
Always laugh when you can. It is cheap medicine. - Lord Byron
Humor is the instinct for taking pain playfully. - Max Eastman
A little chocolate a day keeps the doctor at bay. - Marcia Carrington
I always say shopping is cheaper than a psychiatrist. - Tammy Faye Bakker
Nursing would be a dream job if there were no doctors. - Gerhard Kocher
Champions expect pain, endure pain, and never complain. - Unknown
No man is a good doctor who has never been sick himself. - Chinese Proverb
If you wish to die young, make your physician your heir. - Romania Proverb
We must embrace pain and burn it as fuel for our journey. - Kenji Miyazawa
What do we need a psychiatrist for? We know our kid is nuts. - Homer Simpson
Trips to the dentist - I like to postpone that kind of thing. - Johnny Depp
Psychiatrist: an M.D. who can't stand the sight of blood. - Unknown
How much pain have cost us the evils that have never happened. - Thomas Jefferson
Champagne for my real friends and real pain for my sham friends. - Tom Waits
Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist should have his head examined. - Samuel Goldwyn
A smart mother makes often a better diagnosis than a poor doctor. - August Bier
A dentist at work in his vocation always looks down in the mouth. - George D. Prentice
Be kind to your dentist because he has "fillings" too. - Unknown
I'm so ugly my mother had morning sickness - AFTER I was born. - Rodney Dangerfield
She got her good looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon. - Groucho Marx
There is no curing a sick man who believes himself to be in health. - Henri Amiel
The patient is not likely to recover who makes the doctor his heir. - Thomas Fuller
One of the greatest pains to human nature is the pain of a new idea. - Walter Bagehot
The worst thing about medicine is that one kind makes another necessary. - Elbert Hubbard
One word frees us of all the weight and pain of life: That word is love. - Sophocles
There's no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face. - Bernard Williams
The great art of life is sensation; to feel that we exist, even in pain. - Lord Byron
A good laugh and a long sleep are the best cures in the Doctor's book. - Irish Proverb
We do have a zeal for laughter in most situations, give or take a dentist. - Joseph Heller
Shared pain is lessened; shared joy, increased - thus do we refute entropy. - Spider Robinson
Humor does not diminish the pain - it makes the space around it get bigger. - Allen Klein
Financial ruin from medical bills is almost exclusively an American disease. - Roul Turley
To array a man's will against his sickness is the supreme art of medicine. - Henry Ward Beecher
He's the best physician that knows the worthlessness of the most medicines. - Benjamin Franklin
The doctors can cure all sorts of ills, except the shock of doctors' bills. - Unknown
A psychiatrist is a man who goes to Les Folies Bergere and looks at the audience. - Mervyn Stockwood
Poisons and medicine are oftentimes the same substance given with different intents. - Peter Mere Latham
The only medicine for suffering, crime, and all the other woes of mankind, is wisdom. - Thomas Huxley
What clinical lectures I will give in heaven, demonstrating the ignorance of doctors! - Israel Zangwill
People pay the doctor for his trouble; for his kindness they still remain in his debt. - Seneca
If suffering brought wisdom, the dentist's office would be full of luminous ideas. - Mason Cooley
Life is not over because you have diabetes. Make the most of what you have, be grateful. - Dale Evans
Psychiatry enables us to correct our faults by confessing our parents' shortcomings. - Laurence J Peter
The practice of medicine is a thinker's job, the practice of surgery a plumber's. - Martin H. Fischer
Show me a Jewish boy who doesn't go to medical school and I'll show you a lawyer. - Milton Berle
I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places. - Henny Youngman
I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course. - Groucho Marx
Coaching doesn't make sick people well - it helps healthy people become extra-ordinary. - Thomas Leonard
Let your entrance into the sick room decrease, not increase, the irritability of your patient. - Martin H. Fischer
You can judge your age by the amount of pain you feel when you come in contact with a new idea. - Pearl S. Buck
A physician buries his mistakes, a dentist pulls them out, but a teacher has to live with them. - Unknown
My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four. Unless there are three other people. - Orson Welles
Psychiatrist: a person who will give you expensive answers that your wife will give you for free. - Unknown
German is the most extravagantly ugly language - it sounds like someone using a sick bag on a 747. - Willy Rushton
I'm beginning to have morning sickness. I'm not having a baby, I'm just sick of morning. - Phyllis Diller
When I was born the Doctor took one look at my face, turned me over and said, "Look, twins!" - Rodney Dangerfield
Many people find themselves with illness as they become successful: higher blood pressure and diabetes. - Zong Qinghou
I've always been independent. I've always had courage. But I didn't always own my diabetes. - Mary Tyler Moore
Happiness is your dentist telling you it won't hurt and then having him catch his hand in the drill. - Johnny Carson
I love being married. I was single for a long time, and I just got so sick of finishing my own sentences. - Brian Kiley
I was determined to share my positive approach and not let diabetes stand in the way of enjoying my life. - Paula Deen
The road to medical knowledge is through the pathological museum and not through an apothecary's shop. - William Withey Gull
Kindness and a generous spirit go a long way. And a sense of humor. It's like medicine - very healing. - Max Irons
If my doctor told me I had only six minutes to live, I wouldn't brood, I'd just type a little faster. - Isaac Asimov
The doctor sees all the weakness of mankind, the lawyer all the wickedness, the theologian all the stupidity. - Arthur Schopenhauer
You go to a psychiatrist when you're slightly cracked and keep going until you're completely cracked. - Unknown
The New England Journal of Medicine reports that 9 out of 10 doctors agree that 1 out of 10 doctors is an idiot. - Jay Leno
I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so he gave me pep pills. Know what happened? I ate faster. - Joe E. Lewis
With some diseases, like type 2 diabetes, if people get alerted early, they can take steps to avert getting sick. - Elizabeth Holmes
Just like a shoe, if someone is meant for you, they will fit just perfectly. No forcing, no struggling, and no pain. - Unknown
Following his doctor's orders, Nikita (Khrushchev) has cut his drinking in half. He's leaving out the water. - Bob Hope
The doctor may also learn more about the illness from the way the patient tells the story than from the story itself. - James B. Herrick
I chalk up the fact that I got diabetes to my body saying, 'Dude, you have been doing wrong for way too long!' - Randy Jackson
I do get scared of the dentist, so a drive-through dentist might make me feel more at home. If I got to stay in my car. - Jessica Pare
The trained nurse has become one of the great blessings of humanity, taking a place beside the physician and the priest. - William Osler
The pain you feel today is the strength you feel tomorrow. For every challenge encountered there is opportunity for growth. - Unknown
Only one rule in medical ethics need concern you: that action on your part which best conserves the interest of your patient. - Martin H. Fischer
Trying to manage diabetes is hard because if you don't, there are consequences you'll have to deal with later in life. - Bryan Adams
I've got a great doctor. He gave a guy six months to live. They couldn't pay his bill so he gave him another six months. - Henny Youngman
Let no one suppose that the words doctor and patient can disguise from the parties the fact that they are employer and employee. - George Bernard Shaw
A doctor must work eighteen hours a day and seven days a week. If you cannot console yourself to this, get out of the profession. - Martin H. Fischer
Sometimes, giving up your privacy is a little like going to the dentist and we have let him have access that no one's ever had. - Tom Petty
I do not have a psychiatrist and I do not want one, for the simple reason that if he listened to me long enough, he might become disturbed. - James Thurber
You've heard of people calling in sick. You may have called in sick a few times yourself. But have you ever thought about calling in well? - Tom Robbins
A neurotic is a man who builds a castle in the air. A psychotic is the man who lives in it. And a psychiatrist is a man who collects the rent. - Lord Webb-Johnson
There are two ways you can get through pain. You can let it destroy you, or you can use it as fuel to drive you: to dream bigger, to work harder. - Taylor Swift
When you are called to a sick man, be sure you know what the matter is — if you do not know, nature can do a great deal better than you can guess. - Nicholas de Belleville
One of the first duties of the physician is to educate the masses not to take medicine... Soap and water and common sense are the best disinfectants. - William Osler
Mysterious love, uncertain treasure, hast thou more of pain or pleasure! Endless torments dwell about thee: Yet who would live, and live without thee! - Joseph Addison