#1 humor site on the 'net

Boneless Bananas

Latest in free range, gluten free food

Boneless Bananas thanks to Dave Loewen

Lose any more weight and they'll become Plantains

Boneless Bananas thanks to Dave Loewen

QuotaBills
Let them eat cake. - Marie Antoinette

Abstain from beans. - Pythagoras

Chocolate cake is the bomb! - Scarlett Pomers

Photographing a cake can be art. - Irving Penn

I'm not much of a cake person. - Daniel Radcliffe

Diets are mainly food for thought. - N Wylie Jones

The French: Germans with good food. - Fran Lebowitz

A party without cake is just a meeting. - Julia Child

Laughter is brightest where food is best. - Irish Proverb

The best food is whatever fills the belly. - Arab Proverb

Fame is a fickle food upon a shifting plate. - Emily Dickinson

What poison is to food, self-pity is to life. - Oliver C. Wilson

I want my food dead. Not sick, not dying - dead. - Oscar Wilde

The English contribution to world cuisine. The chip. - John Cleese

Food tastes best when you eat it with your own spoon. - Denmark Proverb

My policy on cake is pro having it and pro eating it. - Boris Johnson

My theory is that all of Scottish cuisine is based on a dare. - Mike Myers

Writing is only the frosting on my cake. I'm whole without it. - Tabitha King

If you are looking for a fly in your food, it means that you are full. - South Africa Proverb

A gourmet who thinks of calories is like a tart who looks at her watch. - James Beard

A nice creamy chocolate cake does a lot for a lot of people; it does for me. - Audrey Hepburn

Always give them the old fire, even when you feel like a squashed cake of ice. - Ethel Merman

The only time to eat diet food is while you're waiting for the steak to cook. - Julia Child

Vegetables are a must on a diet. I suggest carrot cake, zucchini bread and pumpkin pie. - Jim Davis

I always thought that bagels and lox was my soul food, but it turns out it's sushi. - Sara Sheridan

If more of us cared about food and home above gold, this world would be a merrier place. - Bilbo Baggins

From an early age I understood that cooking was never going to be a job, it's a passion. - Gordon Ramsay

I need to tone up, as I eat a lot of fast food. I love Maccy D's, Subway and Domino's. - Amy Childs

We're really just the frosting on a cake and we don't know what's inside the cake. - Adam Riess

If fat people just gave skinny people more food, we could solve obesity and hunger at the same time. - Ashton Kutcher

I refuse to believe that trading recipes is silly. Tuna-fish casserole is at least as real as corporate stock. - Barbara Harrison

Sea spaghetti looks like dark fettuccine and has a similar texture - you can get it in health food stores or online. - Yotam Ottolenghi

Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
So just what are time flies, and why do they fly like an arrow? - Groucho Marx

A burrito is a delicious food item that breaks down all social barriers and leads to temporary spiritual enlightenment. - Lisi Harrison

I like simple food, seasoned with just salt, pepper, oil and vinegar. Complicated food and complicated lives are never good. - Sirio Maccioni

An expert is like the bottom of a double boiler. It shoots off a lot of steam, but it never really knows what's cooking. - Unknown

If another one of my Whole Food friends says my wife should have a home birth, I am going to punch all the soy on the planet. - Patton Oswalt

You know you're getting old when you get that one candle on the cake. It's like, 'See if you can blow this out.' - Jerry Seinfeld

Winter is the time for comfort, for good food and warmth, for the touch of a friendly hand and for a talk beside the fire: it is the time for home. - Edith Sitwell

A stockbroker urged me to buy a stock that would triple its value every year. I told him, "At my age, I don't even buy green bananas." - Claude Pepper


iPhone Charger

Tube Travel

Redneck Tree Fort

OCD Guy

World's Tallest Bus

Long Liquor Store

Happy Wood Pig

On Top Of Things

Anail Retention

Bat Flight

The No Brainer

Truck Bender

Bacon Balls

Fast Closure

Ukrainian Feast

1934 Modern Home

Fliptus

Copper Tubing Specialist

Bach Off Van

Boss Resume

Canadian Gun Shop

Hogwart's Other Bridge

Excalibutter

As The World Turns