#1 humor site on the 'net

How Grandma Handles Windows

It's hard to find such a dedicated window washer in Russia

How Grandma Handles Windows thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

When there's not a ladder to be found

QuotaBills
Old age is a wonderful disguise. - Katherine Applegate

Cherish youth, but trust old age. - Pueblo Proverb

I'm not aging, I'm marinating. - Unknown

A window of opportunity won't open itself. - Dave Weinbaum

Old age is like underwear, it creeps up on you. - Unknown

Old age is when the liver spots show through your gloves. - Phyllis Diller

Fourty is the old age of youth; 50 is the youth of old age. - Victor Hugo

You should never have more children than you have car windows. - Erma Bombeck

The whole purpose of education is to turn mirrors into windows. - Sydney J. Harris

I'm aging like fine wine. I'm getting complex and fruity. - Unknown

Only a biker knows why a dog sticks his head out of a car window. - Unknown

Old age is the most unexpected of all things that happen to a man. - Leon Trotsky

Man fools himself. He prays for a long life, and he fears an old age. - Chinese Proverb

Forget aging. If you're six feet above ground, it's a good day. - Faith Hill

Young men soon give, and soon forget, affronts; old age is slow in both. - Joseph Addison

I suppose real old age begins when one looks backward rather than forward. - May Sarton

I'm so ugly I stuck my head out the window and got arrested for mooning. - Rodney Dangerfield

The key to successful aging is to pay as little attention to it as possible. - Judith Regan

I will never be an old man. To me, old age is always 15 years older than I am. - Francis Bacon

Menopause is our chance to say, "I am woman - open a freaking window." - Unknown

It was a blonde. A blonde to make a bishop kick a hole in a stained glass window. - Raymond Chandler

My favourite place to eat is my grandma's kitchen. She makes a mean crab cake. - Karlie Kloss

Children are a great comfort in your old age, and they help you reach it faster, too. - Lionel Kauffman

If you fall out of that window and break both your legs, don't come running to me. - Groucho Marx

We could certainly slow the aging process down if it had to work its way through Congress. - Will Rogers

Faith goes up the stairs that love has built and looks out the window which hope has opened. - Charles Spurgeon

A habit cannot be tossed out the window. It must be coaxed down the stairs a step at a time. - Mark Twain

Old age is like a plane flying through a storm. Once you are aboard, there is nothing you can do. - Golda Meir

There are only three things that can kill a farmer: lightning, rolling over in a tractor, and old age. - Bill Bryson

To keep the heart unwrinkled, to be hopeful, kindly, cheerful, reverent - that is to triumph over old age. - Thomas Bailey Aldrich

I'm learning in my old age that the only thing you can do to keep your sanity is to stay in the moment. - Willem Dafoe

Old age is an excellent time for outrage. My goal is to say or do at least one outrageous thing every week. - Maggie Kuhn

Old age is when you resent the swimsuit issue of Sports Illustrated because there are fewer articles to read. - George Burns

The larger office, the corner space, the extra window are the teddy bears and tricycles of adult office life. - Willard Gaylin

Don't waste a minute not being happy. If one window closes, run to the next window - or break down a door. - Brooke Shields

I have this theory that chocolate slows down the aging process. It may not be true, but do I dare take the chance? - Unknown

We do not need to attend classroom training programs for everything. Observation opens the windows of knowledge around us. - Sukant Ratnakar

We are all dreaming of some magical rose garden over the horizon - instead of enjoying the roses that are blooming outside our windows today. - Dale Carnegie

Old age has a great sense of calm and freedom. When the passions have relaxed their hold you have escaped, not from one master, but from many. - Plato

It was any outcast's nightmare. If I looked carefully, I suspected I might find it beneath the black paint of the small acrylic by the window. - Nancy Werlin


Designer Lamp

Scottish Road Sign

Too Late Now

How Paper Beats Rock

Joburg Police

Behind Curtain Number One

One More Drop

Changing Priorities

Made His Bed

Dog Sled

Only In Canada - Nosey Moose

Camper Tank

Plane Pushers

Wise Electricity Use

Critter Control

Redneck Ice Fishing

Skeletons In The Closet

Captive Audience Twins

Brew Table

Nailed It Baby

Water Supply

Holding His Own Portraits

Hawaii Scuba Bus

Chicken Pie